Transcript – Masturbation Myths by Teesha Morgan at TEDxStanleyPark
Right click to download the audio:
Teesha Morgan – Sex Therapist & Couples Counselor
Did you know that spicy foods actually increase your sex drive, that they wake up your libido and actually cause you to become more lustful as a result?
And did you know that if you’re a man and you masturbate enough, you can actually become infertile? Not only that but it can cause a slow degenerative condition that not only affects the man but any offspring that he has as well?
And did you know that too much self-loving can actually cause you to grow hair on the palms of your hands? Everyone will know what you do with your spare time?
Okay. Everything I just told you was a lie. Thank God. But it was not that long ago when people used to believe these things and many still do. So today I’m talking to you about masturbation myths, so we can uncover some of today’s most perpetuated falsehoods and unearth some from the past that have actually come to shape our present day reality. For example, unsweetened Kellogg’s Corn Flakes were developed by Dr. John Harvey Kellogg. See, he was an anti-masturbation crusader. He believed as did many people at the time that spicy foods led to lust and lust led to masturbation and masturbation led to a whole host of horrible things. So he developed this diet that was bland in flavor to hopefully decrease the chances of masturbation. It was actually his brother Will that added sugar to the flakes and market them as a breakfast cereal before they took off.
The Graham Cracker actually has a similar past. Sylvester Graham was a minister and anti-masturbation crusader and he developed the Graham Cracker as well as part of a bland diet in order to decrease masturbation. If you only knew what we did with S’mores.
Now it wasn’t just these two men campaigning against the evils of masturbation. In fact, most healthcare professionals at the time and health manuals believed the same thing. So now it’s easy for us to snicker at this and think how naive and ignorant these people must have been to believe such silly things because of course we have above leaps and bounds out of our grandparents’ generation of sexual shaming. We know our facts. I mean we’re part of movements like legalizing gay marriage and improving our sex education in our school systems and increasing our cliteracy through things like the Vagina Monologues. We know our facts. Or do we?
There’s actually still a lot of falsehood around masturbation today. You see as a sex therapist I get to meet and talk with a whole host of different people. It’s actually quite a unique opportunity because people come to me and they told me their innermost thoughts and feelings, their desires, their fears, their anxieties, their wishes, everything. And over time you start to notice patterns. So for example, women will often come to me because they have not been able to have an orgasm.
Now being pre-orgasmic could stem from a whole host of different things but one trend I often see is that many women still feel so much shame around self pleasuring, around masturbation that they don’t do it. Therefore they’re reliant on their partner as their only means to orgasm attainment but they have no roadmap for their body.
With men, I often see a different trend, or maybe — stay with me on this — maybe they’ve relied on masturbation as their sole means for orgasm attainment for so long that this has created adverse patterns. Now regardless if the client is a male or a female, looking at the issues surrounding masturbation and how that ties to the presenting sexual issue is extremely important to recognize.
So today I thought we’d address masturbation myths as our mistaken beliefs will have a trickle-down effect on future generations and contribute to many sexuality based issues that I see today. So let’s do a little fact or fiction with our favorite past time, shall we?
Fact or fiction. Women who rely on vibrators or toys to masturbate will not be able to have an orgasm with their partner during sex. They will become depended on it. That is fiction. Yes.
So some women do like more intense direct stimulation on the clitoral hood which a vibrator would provide more so than a penis. Yes, but that does not cause an inability to reach orgasm by other means. In fact, research shows that women who take the time to self-explore and learn about their body through masturbation are more likely to attain an orgasm with a partner than those who do not.
All right. Fact or fiction. Those in dating relationships are more likely to masturbate than those who are single. But it’s a fact. So those in relationships are more likely or just as likely to masturbate than those who are single. Not only that but homosexual behavior is associated with a higher degree or higher frequency of masturbation. Men masturbate more than women, older people less than younger people, African-Americans less than other groups, non-religious more so than Christians, and the more educated you are, the more likely it is that you will masturbate.
Fact or fiction. I think she’s reading Fifty Shades of Grey. Fact.
Women generally masturbate by inserting objects into the vagina therefore simulating penetrative sex. Fiction, yes.
Now, yes, some women do masturbate in this fashion and that’s fine and completely normal. However it’s far more likely for women to masturbate by using clitoral stimulation or the stimulation of the clitoral hood. Clitoris is actually a very interesting little body part. It’s not merely a little button that’s hidden away, you know we say look for the little man in the canoe. It’s actually a fairly large internal organ and it is the only body part that exists solely for pleasure. Clitoris is estimated to be between 9 and 12 centimeters long and 6 centimeters wide.
Fact or fiction. Early childhood masturbation is abnormal and may mean that your child is hypersexual. Well done, fiction.
So children learn very early on what feels good, when they touch the ball, it’s both male and female. So early childhood masturbation well before puberty even into infancy is actually quite normal.
Fact or fiction. Too much masturbation can cause adverse health risks. Fiction.
So the only health risk associated with too much masturbation would be allergic reactions due to lubricants’ infections due to unwashed toys or just skin irritation in general. Masturbation is actually the ultimate form of safe sex. Fact. Masturbation resulting in orgasm actually carries with it a plethora of positive health benefits. It alleviates headaches, it decreases stress, it’s a asleep aid. It actually improves your immune functioning. And women who masturbate during their period can actually alleviate menstrual cramps. It’s estimated that about 95% of men and 89% of women have masturbated at some time in their life, so masturbating for both sexes every day even is normal and healthy. So the only adverse health risk that might be associated with it is if you are masturbating so much that you start going to work less, say or is impeding your daily functioning and social responsibilities, then it may be an issue and you should come see me.
Fact or fiction. Masturbation will not impede your stamina or in fact your performance before a big game or workout. It’s a fact. So as already said masturbation carries with it a plethora of positive health benefits. So it actually may be beneficial to you rather than harmful.