So, I typically ask thinking types, “Tell me when you want someone to give you some appreciation or recognition for your work on that project.”
And my hand will move along and finally, when I get to the end, they’ve finished the project, they will say, “Now.”
And I’ll ask them, “So, what happens if someone gives you some recognition earlier in that work?”
And they say, “Well, I’m a little worried. I think I’m working for an idiot. They have no sense of standards and what is good work.”
Now, I ask feeling types the same thing, “When do you want recognition on that project?,” and they call out, “Now, now, now, now, now.”
All the way through.
“So, what does that look like?” I’m a thinking type, I’m waiting till I’m done. They say like, “Well, it can be things like, ‘Good start!,’ or, ‘Gee, you had some great ideas here.'”
And then, I ask the feeling types, “So, what happens if someone gives you some recognition — if they wait until the end?”
And they say, “Well, I think that they don’t care, and if they don’t care about me, they don’t care about my work, and it affects my morale.”
Now, both thinking types and feeling types can come to the exact same conclusions. They just do it in different ways. And it’s really helpful for thinking types to remember to always ask, “How would this logically impact people?,” and for feeling types to always ask, “What’s the most important thing here?”
But we need to move on.
Our last one has to do with how we like to go about living our lives. And our words are “judging” and “perceiving” in this preference pair, and “judging” here doesn’t mean “judgmental.”
But what judging types like to do is organize things, make decisions, get on with it, and perceiving types like to kind of go with the flow and be spontaneous and continue gathering information.
So, I’ll admit, I’m a judging type, I love to make lists, I love to check off things from the list and I’ve even been known to put things on the list I’ve already done for the sheer joy of checking them off. True confessions. Okay.
Now, I happen to live with a man who prefers perceiving. He thinks I’m nuts. His life is about options, it’s about going with the flow. So, you can imagine what happens when we go to a Chinese restaurant: I’m making my decisions — you know, judging is about, “Let’s make a decision and get on with it” –
And he’s looking over the menu, looking at what other people have, trying to decide what he’s going to have, that’s perhaps new and different, and I’m getting hungry.
But, for perceiving types, it’s no decision before its time. So, judging types will often use words that end in “ed”: “I’ve finished that,” “I’ve completed that,” I’ve decided that,” and perceiving types will often talk in “ing” words: “I’m finishing that,” “I’m completing that,” “I’m deciding that.”
So, if we look at what’s a plan, judging types will often say, “A plan is a systematic way of achieving an objective,” and perceiving types will say, “Plans, they’re options.”
Now, I also have a little activity that I like to do with people, and that’s I’ll ask people to think about the next free day, the next day they have off, okay?
And I typically have judging types start out and I want to know how many plans they have for that day off.
So, I start giving them numbers and, as we get to the higher and higher numbers, the judging types look prouder and prouder. They just love it.
Now, when I do the same thing for the perceiving types, they’ve raised their hands and I can see they get more and more embarrassed as the number gets higher and they’ll often call out, “But they’re not my plans. Someone came up with them for me.”
So, both can have lovely days off and, in fact, sometimes I’ll have judging plans, people coming to me and saying, “You know, I must be a perceiving type because on my next day off I plan to do nothing.”
You heard the word “plan.”
So, this is about how you live your life. All of these come together in a magical way. So, we’ve got four preference pairs. We’ve got how you gain energy — extroversion, introversion; how you gather information — sensing, intuition; how you make decisions — thinking or feeling; and how you live your life — judging or perceiving.
So, there are 16 possible unique types within this.
Now, we use a shorthand for this. You probably have already figured it out. The only trick is we have to use an “N” for “intuition” because we’ve already used the “I” up for “introversion.”
Now, of these types, when they come together in that unique chemical reaction, we say the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
Now, my particular type happens to be ESTJ: I’m extroverted, sensing, thinking and judging.
So, you’ve heard a lot about my type. I’m also really responsible: you give me something to do and I will follow through to completion. That’s how I got into the Myers-Briggs in the first place.
I walked into my manager’s office one day and he said, “Jean, everybody in this office is going to become an expert in something. Yours is going to be the Myers-Briggs.”