Become the Person You Can't Imagine: Norman Bacal (Transcript)

Here is the full transcript of Norman Bacal’s talk titled “Become the Person You Can’t Imagine” at TEDxRyersonU conference.

In his motivational talk titled “Become the Person You Can’t Imagine,” Norman Bacal shares his personal journey of transformation and growth, emphasizing the power of single-minded determination and the importance of embracing failure as a teacher. He recounts his experiences of moving to Toronto to establish a new office, learning karate to develop discipline, and ultimately, overcoming the monumental failure of his law firm’s collapse.

Bacal highlights the significance of seeking guidance and learning from mistakes, urging his audience to take charge of their lives and decisions. Through his story, he demonstrates how unexpected turns and challenges can lead to unimagined success and fulfillment. Bacal dedicates his speech to the memory of Dr. Harry Lyon-Bacal, whose wisdom and legacy deeply influenced his life and career path.

Listen to the audio version here:

TRANSCRIPT:

Over the next few minutes, I don’t plan to change the blueprint of your life, your career, or even your tomorrow. But I do plan to challenge what you think about it, because what I’ve learned has changed my tomorrows, my career, and my life. But before I start, I want to introduce you to someone who’s here with me today.

This is Uncle Harry. Oh, you can’t see him? Then, picture this: Uncle Harry’s a little shorter than me, a lot greyer. He has this bushy mustache, wears a white lab coat with a black stethoscope around his neck, and always has this unlit cigarette dangling out of his mouth.

Uncle Harry’s Influence

He served with distinction in the Canadian Navy in World War II, and went on to become one of Montreal’s most beloved pediatricians. All his little patients called him Uncle Harry.

In fact, many of them still do.

So, I’m 19 years old, just returned from a European vacation, with a gray tan, a bushy haircut, and a long beard, ready to begin my major in biology at McGill University, headed towards, well, I’m not sure where I’m headed. Which is why I go to see Uncle Harry for advice, he being a doctor and all.

But what he tells me is not what I expect. “Norm,” he says, “think of your career as a river, and you have a choice. You can launch your boat in the water, and paddle upstream towards a goal you think you want, only to find you arrive there exhausted, and it isn’t what you want. Or, you can steer your boat downstream, and find all the bends and turns which provide you opportunities you never could have imagined. That’s what I did, and I’ve had the most incredible career. And one more thing, Norm, whatever it is you do, make sure you come to love it.”

Wow, that was very serious advice. So, what did I do with it? I think I did what most first-year university students would do. I gathered together with my buddies, and we went to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show, about 15 times. No, I never discussed Uncle Harry’s advice with anyone for almost 40 years.

University Challenges

But, it’s just a few weeks later, I’m standing in my first biology lab at McGill University. It is huge. We’re in the big leagues. There are microscopes all over. I’m standing in front of one, looking for a fungus. And I move my slide up and down, back and forth, and I see nothing. And I keep trying, and I’m just getting more frustrated, and I start to sweat, because there’s this impatient line growing behind me.

Finally, I find that fungus. At this point, I have another F-word for it. And then I feel this presence behind me, and this little whisper, “you’re never going to love this.” I bend over, pick up my backpack, head down the corridor to my course advisor’s office. “Barbara, how do I get out of this?”

Well, Barbara listens to my rant, and being the scientist she is, she keeps a very straight face, and finally, just asks me two questions. “Norm, forget about school for a minute. What is it you like, and what interests you?” Oh, well, that was easy. Math, logical puzzles, argument. Barbara helps me find a law course being given the next semester to replace the lost lab credit. Legal Problems of the Poor. It’s being given by a young Montreal lawyer by the name of Bob Cooper.

Well, you know how it is when you really connect with a teacher? Bob and I hit it off. In fact, by the end of the semester, Bob has me convinced to make an application to law school. He even writes me the letter of reference that helps me get in.

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Bob Cooper changed the course of my river. But you want to know something else? Bob Cooper didn’t love me. He didn’t love anyone else. Bob Cooper didn’t love being a lawyer anymore. He told me he had this dream of becoming a film producer. Well, roll the camera forward twenty years, and Bob Cooper has become the president of HBO Pictures in Los Angeles. He then goes on to work for Steven Spielberg at DreamWorks, and forms his own film and television production company, and becomes one of my clients. Uncle Harry’s River. But it was way more complicated than that. So let me start with the night that I met Pierre Elliott Trudeau.

Meeting Pierre Elliott Trudeau

He had just shocked the country by announcing he was resigning as Prime Minister and was going to join a small Montreal law firm, Heenan Blaikie, where I happened to be working as a young lawyer. Well, Roy Heenan was so excited with the national news that he held a little soiree at his house for all of us to go meet Mr. Trudeau. I went, but I didn’t really want to be there.

I don’t know about you, but I wasn’t really comfortable in those kinds of social environments. I’m terrible at small talk. I’ll have to say something to him, and he’s never going to remember me anyway. So as soon as it’s feasible, I make my excuses, head for the door. And who should be standing there, not that far from me, with his coat on? Yep, Pierre Trudeau.

Well, as we head out into the snowy cold, I can’t help but get cold. I get all clammed up. I know I have to say something. And I hear these words coming out of my mouth. “Can I offer you a lift home, sir?” My little hatchback is parked across the street. There’s a car seat in the back. I can’t remember when the last time was I cleaned it up. “Oh my God.” And he says, “yes.”

Like, what am I going to say? He’s maybe the most famous Prime Minister in Canadian history, and I’m nobody. Well, we get to the car, get in, and I have this flash. We have one thing in common. “How are your children?” I ask. Well, he starts to talk, and he doesn’t stop talking until we get home. I discover that his oldest child, Justin, is just a young teenager, and he’s quite disappointed in him.

Reflections on Paths and Potential

“When I was a boy,” he said, “it was before the days of television, I listened to radio for amusement. I read the classics. But Justin, all he’s interested in is watching reruns of this film called Star Wars.” And then he said the words I would never forget. “I have no idea what is to become of that boy.” Who can possibly judge the course of anyone’s river? From Star Wars superfan, to high school teacher, to the Luke Skywalker of Canada. That was his journey. But my boat, it was going nowhere. I felt like I was drifting. In fact, by my year-end review, my boss says to me, “Norm, you have a lot of potential. But there’s something missing, and I just can’t tell you what it is.”

He couldn’t tell me what it was. Was he serious? How could I fix myself if I didn’t know what was wrong with me? I went home all depressed, and my wife Sharon talked to me all night. I think I was getting good at listening. And finally she said, “Norm, I don’t think the problem is you, but there’s a problem with your approach. You need to take a little initiative. You need to take charge.”

Take charge! It was like she lit a flame. It was more like a match to start, but enough to illuminate Uncle Harry. He didn’t say, “put your boat in the river.” He said, “steer it.” I was missing a rudder. I went back to work the next day angry, mostly at myself. I’d spent four years waiting for the work to arrive on my desk.

A New Focus

Four years waiting for my career to happen to me. Well, no more! From that point on, I took charge of everything in my career, from what I was doing, more important to why I was doing it, and most important to how I could distinguish myself. I found a very narrow area of Canadian tax law to specialize in, the financing of movies and television shows. The industry was still fairly young, and a lot of people thought I should quit, because who knew where that was going?

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But producers in Toronto began to take notice. And that was the interesting thing. I didn’t notice a change so much in me, as much as in other people’s reactions to me. I began to speak with a little more authority. My confidence grew. Cut to the next scene: New Year’s Eve, 1989. We’re sitting at home. Sharon is pregnant with our fourth child, but I feel something growing in me as well. Something that needs to be born immediately. And the words just come bursting out: “That’s it. We’re moving to Toronto. That’s where our future is.”

A New Beginning

Well, we talked about it all night through the next day. I got ready, because I had to go meet with the managing partner, Pina Blaikie, and Peter Blaikie is this big, imposing man with a booming voice. “Bacal, how can I help you?” I was a little nervous. Okay, I was a lot nervous. But I summoned my courage. “Peter, I’d like to open the Heenan Blaikie office in Toronto.” I took charge. Well, six months later, the baby is born. It’s a beautiful baby.

It’s a beautiful baby. We pack up the truck. We move down the 401. Shortly after that, we have our opening party in Yorkville. And who should be there? None other than Pierre Trudeau. And we talk. So that got me to Toronto. Taking charge was the beginning. But it wasn’t enough, because did I have any idea how to run an office? I had no idea.

No idea how to build an organization. But I was about to learn from a very interesting, inspirational source. My son Brian is getting bullied in grade one. So we start him in karate. I decide to join him. We walk into the dojo and I see this sign on the wall. It says, “Regardless of the number of years of practice, you will never advance without single-minded determination.” Single-minded determination. I understand why it’s there.

Karate Lessons

So white belts like Brian and I will fight through those moments of difficulty, the pain. When we look at the black belts and we see we can never be that, we will stick with it. We will be determined. We will develop a fighting spirit. Well, spoiler alert, I stayed with the karate for almost 20 years and achieved my third degree, or sandan, in terms of black belts. In fact, to break the tension, I wouldn’t mind sparring right now. And I gather Justin used to do some boxing. So bring it on. Nobody’s got enough problems.

Single-minded determination became my mantra. It helped me get through those moments of doubt. When others doubted me, when I doubted myself. Every consultant I spoke to said, “There is no way your startup will ever compete with the major firms in Toronto. Not possible.” And that became my marketing approach. “We are the underdogs. We are determined. We will compete.” Cut and fade into the next scene.

It’s almost 25 years later and we have done it. We have built this glorious national firm with international dimensions. My career as well has blossomed. I’ve gone from representing small independent producers to becoming an advisor to major Hollywood studios. I was sitting in the boardroom the day that the decision to produce the Hunger Games was made. How cool was that? In fact, it was unimaginable. And that was my ride.

Learning from Failure

But there was one more thing I needed in my boat that helped me get there. It wasn’t so much something I learned. It was something that I had to unlearn. And that was that failure was the adversary. “It’s something you’ll also have to unlearn. Failure is not your adversary. It is your teacher.” Failure is not the boulder in the river that’s going to crush you unless you let your fear of it crush you. Interesting.

See, as managing partner, I learned that one out of every four decisions I made was going to be wrong. One in four. And it wasn’t so much about the successes as what I learned from the mistakes and the failures. How we adjusted, how we moved forward, how we were able to compete. So I could give you lots of examples of how I overcame failure and the mistakes that were made and the rejections that we suffered, but I’m only going to give you one.

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Seven years ago, my boat capsized. I was drowning. One year after I’d stepped down from my leadership position, the law firm that I had helped build collapsed. Boom. The shockwaves of the tsunami could be felt from coast to coast. The greatest failure in Canadian law firm history. That’s the way the national media was reporting it. In its final two months, I returned to a leadership position in an effort to save it, but I failed. 1100 people out of work.

Life’s Challenges

The feeling of loss, indescribable. Have you ever lost anything near or dear to you? If you haven’t, eventually you will, because it’s called life. You see, Uncle Harry’s River isn’t just filled with opportunities. It’s got rocks and rapids, and every once in a while you miss the final turnoff before the falls. So I had a choice. I could give up, drown, disappear into retirement, or I could start over. Now, it’s one thing to start when you’re in your twenties, but is it any different when you’re in your late fifties?

I was about to find out. I found a day job and I began to write at night. I had no intention of writing a book. I was pretty certain I could never write a book, but I needed to process my feelings, my anger. I began to write down my stories, and I wrote, night after night, week after week, month after month, until I discovered I was starting to like it. I was exactly where you are right now, discovering an interest, trying to determine if it might lead to another river.

There was only one problem. I didn’t have sufficient skill as a writer, and that’s when it hit me. Flash the vignettes of Barbara and Bob Cooper, Roy Heenan, Pierre Trudeau, my wife Sharon, my partners, all the mentors along the way. I didn’t do it myself the first time. I needed paddlers in my boat. But where to find them? I was home, alone, like so many of us are these days. I went online.

I picked up books on writing by Stephen King and others. I read my favorite authors. I looked up a couple of authors online and asked if they wouldn’t mind critiquing my work. I got started on my path, on my river. And seven years later, once more, I am at this unimaginable point in my life. Norman Bacal, author. I stay in touch with Uncle Harry. We talk from time to time. Okay, mostly he listens. But he was right.

Success is not a ladder. It’s not a straight line. It’s filled with bends and turns and falling out of the boat and climbing back in, discovering you didn’t drown. You just learned how to swim. So that’s been my journey up until now. And it’s been a glorious one. But it’s taken guts and filled me with exhilaration. But that’s been my choice. But what about you? What are you going to choose?

Uncle Harry’s Legacy

And here are my words of advice. “Launch your boat in your river. Work on developing your skills. Take charge of your decisions. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Don’t be afraid to fail. Be determined. Work through those moments of doubts. And never be ashamed to ask for help. That is how you can become the person you can’t imagine.” And as for Uncle Harry, well, once more he’s shuffling off the stage, back bent, the gowns hanging a little lower, that cigarette still dangling out of his mouth as he leaves us.

He never waves goodbye. Because really, he never leaves. He never leaves. He never leaves. This speech has been dedicated to the memory of Dr. Harry Lyon-Bacal, member of the Order of the British Empire in 1946 for distinguished military service. May his memory be a blessing and his legacy his words. And thank you.

Become the Person You Can’t Imagine: Norman Bacal (Transcript)