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Home » Chemistry For Your Sex-Starved Marriage: Jessica Gold (Transcript)

Chemistry For Your Sex-Starved Marriage: Jessica Gold (Transcript)

Here is the full transcript of Jessica Gold’s talk titled “Chemistry For Your Sex-Starved Marriage” at TEDxGrandviewHeights conference.

Jessica Gold’s talk, “Chemistry For Your Sex-Starved Marriage,” offers a compelling and innovative approach to revitalizing intimacy in relationships. Drawing from her unique background as a PhD organic chemist turned sex and relationship coach, Gold delves into the essential principles of emotional safety and spark, which she identifies as crucial for deepening connection and enhancing sexual fulfillment.

She challenges the conventional wisdom of “happy wife, happy life,” arguing that true relationship satisfaction comes from authenticity and mutual respect rather than sacrificing one’s needs for the sake of peace. By sharing her personal journey of transformation—from a career in science to exploring the complexities of human bonding—Gold illustrates the power of applying scientific curiosity to our personal lives. She provides practical strategies for couples to rekindle their intimacy, emphasizing the importance of communication, emotional vulnerability, and playful interaction.

Gold’s talk is a call to action for individuals and couples to approach their relationships with the same dedication and openness to learning that they would apply to any important endeavor in life. Ultimately, “Chemistry For Your Sex-Starved Marriage” is a testament to the transformative potential of viewing love and intimacy through the lens of emotional and physical chemistry.

Listen to the audio version here:


Understanding Relationship Dynamics

If I do everything she wants to please her and keep her happy, then I’ll have the intimacy and sex that I want. I’ll have a good marriage and a happy life. This is the refrain that I hear over and over from the men who come to work with me in my practice. After all, “happy wife, happy life,” right? Wrong.

Of course, the intention behind this saying is good. Who doesn’t want their partner to be happy? But we misunderstand how to execute it. Because when you abandon yourself in order to get love, it’s an unspoken transaction that creates resentment, not attraction. So what do you do instead? Because today, as many as one in seven adults are in marriages with little to no sex. Now for some couples, this isn’t a problem.

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