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Home » Dear Overwhelmed Moms, Self-Care Isn’t Selfish: Liz Carlile (Transcript)

Dear Overwhelmed Moms, Self-Care Isn’t Selfish: Liz Carlile (Transcript)

Here is the full transcript of Liz Carlile’s talk titled “Dear Overwhelmed Moms, Self-Care Isn’t Selfish” at TEDxColoradoSprings conference.

Listen to the audio version here:


The Shift from “Me” to “We”

And when I first learned that I was pregnant seven years ago, my whole mindset shifted from one of me to we. I became obsessed from getting all the right prenatal vitamins to drinking tons of water to moving my body. Everything I was doing was for this other life form that I wanted to be absolutely sure was going to be healthy and happy. But I want to challenge you today.

I want you to consider the notion that mothers not only could but should be more selfish. Now before you roll your eyes or laugh or judge, hear me out. Because I’m coming to you with this because I was a mother that was not being selfish, was not taking care of myself. I was doing everything I could for my son at the expense of my own mindset and well-being.

And all of that came to a head one night. My son was about six weeks old. We were going through our nighttime routine. I had him in the bath, splashing in the water. And he’s looking up at me with these beautiful blue eyes and smiling. And I just started to cry. I’m crying. And I’m thinking, “Liz, what’s wrong?

A Moment of Realization

Why aren’t you happy? Your son is healthy. You’re healthy. Why are you in such a dark place? And in that moment of darkness, my own mother’s words came through, as they often do, don’t they? I remember her saying, ‘Liz, if I didn’t get my run in, if I didn’t do my Joni Greggins workout tape, I wasn’t me for the day.’ And I thought, of course, I haven’t been taking care of myself. You see, my mother was one who ran the household. She had four crazy children.

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