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Home » Feelings: Handle Them Before They Handle You by Mandy Saligari (Transcript)

Feelings: Handle Them Before They Handle You by Mandy Saligari (Transcript)

Mandy Saligari

Here is the full transcript of addiction and parenting expert Mandy Saligari’s TEDx Talk on Feelings: Handle Them Before They Handle You at TEDxGuildford conference. This event took place on April 13, 2017.

Listen to the MP3 Audio: Feelings- Handle them before they handle you by Mandy Saligari at TEDxGuildford

 

Mandy Saligari – Founder and Clinical Director of CHARTER

I’m an addictions therapist. I’m also a recovering addict. I’m a parent and I do a lot of work now in the field of recovery and looking at addiction, looking at mental health, and most importantly, looking at early intervention and what is the one thing that we could really home in on, that will be the best preventative measure. And I think that that falls into those two little words: self-esteem.

But self-esteem is a very well-known phrase, but what actually is it? And I think that in its kind of core, self-esteem is how I feel about myself, and therefore how I treat myself, therefore how I behave.

When I say to people, “I’m a recovering addict,” they say things like, “What were you addicted to?” And I kind of yawn, you know? It’s not about what I’m addicted to or was addicted to, this is about why would I use something outside of myself, in an attempt to fix how I feel, to the detriment of myself?

So my first message to you, really, is that addiction isn’t the drug of choice, of which, I believe, there are probably 15 or 16 regular manifestations of addiction. But it is the pattern of delegating, of outsourcing your emotional process on to something else that backfires.

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