Here is the full text and summary of Kevin Williams’ talk titled “Everything I Know I Learned in Kindergarten (and SEAL Training)” at TEDxSaintThomas conference.
Listen to the audio version here:
TRANSCRIPT:
Mrs. Packard was the name of my kindergarten teacher, and I adored this woman, as I hope most kindergartners do. She had short blonde hair, she was tall, and she had round-rimmed glasses.
To be honest with you, I only remember one other thing about Mrs. Packard, and it was during recess one day. It was wintertime, there was snow on the ground, and I spied the girl that I had a crush on. Her name was Laura Block.
Now I don’t know how the little kindergartner’s antilles do it, but back in my day, the way to push that relationship forward was to hit her in the back of the head with a snowball. So I proceeded to make said snowball, and I drifted back into her blind spot, and I closed the distance, and I let it loose.
Now I’d like to think that I was proficient at many things as a kindergartner, but throwing snowballs was not one of them. So it sailed over her head, fortunately for Laura, unfortunately for the little girl just beyond Laura. It augured itself into her ear. So you had freezing water rushing to her eardrum. She runs off to tell Mrs. Packard, and I find myself in whatever it is, kindergarten detention. No more recess for Kev.
And I’m sitting there waiting for Mrs. Packard to lecture me, to punish me, and to my surprise, she just asked me a question. She says, “Who do you want to be when you grow up?” So that’s an easy question to answer. This is circa 1977, and the answers rhyme with, I want to be a Jedi Knight, and I want to be a firefighter.
And she said, no, no, no, that’s not what I asked you. I didn’t ask you what you wanted to do, I asked you who you wanted to be. Don’t ever confuse those two questions, because who you are is the mean little boy that just hurt that girl with a snowball. That’s pretty edgy.
So I sat there ashamed and sad and confused, because the gravity of what she pointed out to me wasn’t clear at the time, it wouldn’t be clear for years. But Mrs. Packard, see, she got it, right? She knew it. She knew this premium on character, and she knew that it’s formed at an early age, and she knew that it probably costs us a lot more than we’re willing to pay. She knew that it’s a lot tougher to recover it than it is to keep it.
So fast forward 28 years, I’m in the military, and I slide into this role as the basic training officer of basic underwater demolition SEAL school, and that’s a lot of words that just describe the guy who runs the 25-week SEAL training program. So when a kid raises his hand and says, I want to join the SEAL teams, whether he’s actually in the military or he’s not in the military, he’ll go to boot camp and then he’ll go straight to the schoolhouse, the 25-week schoolhouse.
And it didn’t take me long in that position to realize that SEAL training was the proving ground for Mrs. Packard’s lesson on character. So the Secretary of Defense, right, he has a series of lists for all of the teams and units under his command, and the SEALs have their own list. And on that list it might say, I need the SEALs to do these things, right? I need them to kill bad guys in dark places in the world and rescue hostages in dark places in the world. I need them to capture bad guys, take down ships, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
And for each one of those missions, the SEALs have individual skills, right, that they need to be able to do. They need to be able to handle weapons and explosives, and they need to jump out of planes, they need to dive under the water, and the list would go on and on. And that’s what the list looks like today.
Well, 50 years ago, say, during Vietnam, that list looked a lot different. Twenty-five years ago during the Persian Gulf War, that list looked a lot different, right? And that makes sense because warfare changes, special warfare changes. The techniques, the tactics, right, the technology, it evolves exponentially. So you adopt on the fly.
But guess what hasn’t changed a whole heck of a lot is basic SEAL training. So if I took all of you on a tour of the SEAL training center, you would be disappointed. It’s a blast from the past. It is not a peek into the future, right? You’d walk through and you’d see 300-pound telephone poles lined up on the beach. You’d see pull-up bars, right? You’d see rope climbs. You’d see rubber boats that weigh 300 pounds that look like they’re 50 years old. You’d see dive rigs that look like they’re 150 years old.
And the kids that walk through the door, they come from all walks of life. They come from Georgia. They come from West Virginia, California. They come right off the ships in the Navy. They’re tall. They’re skinny. They’re short. They’re wide. Some of them are ex-bankers. Some of them are ex-teachers. Some of them are ex-grand pianists. Some of them have never set foot in the ocean. Some of them have never even seen a gun.
And so if I lined up a class that was just about to start training, it would number about, probably in this room here, about the same as, so what do we have in here, 150-ish, let’s say, 160. So you’re a training class just about to start training. I line you up and I coach somebody from the audience and we have a competition between me and you to predict the 30, because only 30 of you are going to make it.
With that number, give or take, 30 will make it. Twenty-five weeks later, you’re going to graduate. Everyone else goes away.
You would have as good a chance as me or any SEAL instructor, for that matter, of picking who’s going to make it, right? Why is that? Because SEAL instructors know what Mrs. Packard knows, is that making that three-meter head shot with a snowball doesn’t matter. Making a 50-meter head shot with a snowball doesn’t matter.
You can be an expert in a ton of things and it doesn’t matter. They’re not looking for experts. And despite what you may read about or despite what you may see on the big screen, it’s not about survival of the fittest, not even by a stretch. What you’re looking for is the kid who knows it’s a bad idea to throw that snowball, bad idea. Wrong place, wrong time, wrong target, wrong weapon of choice. The intent versus the expected outcome, it’s not going to work out in my favor. It’s not going to work out in my favor, right?
And even if it was a good idea to throw the snowball, you’re going to look at the risk and say, nope, I’m walking away. So who you are, what you value, how committed you are, what are you prepared to do to preserve this value system that you have, what’s the true nature of your character, that is going to be tested. And that place is absolutely going to find the answer to those questions.
Because the truth is, is that that sexy, sophisticated list the Secretary of Defense has of all the things that they need to be able to do, that can be taught. We can teach you those things. You can be taught how to take a 500-meter sniper shot. You can be taught how to jump out of an airplane at 30,000 feet. You can be taught how to become a combat diver.
Lee, Lee can be taught how to, bad example, bad example, right? So, but what you can’t teach, what you cannot teach is character, right? The instructors in the three short weeks that they have these kids, before the fourth week, which is Darwin’s Big Cut, it’s called Hell Week, we’ll touch on it, they’ve got it for three weeks. You can’t rewire someone’s values, they’re already raised, they’ve been raised, right? Whether it was by their parents or their grandparents or a pack of lemurs, they bring that value system with them in the front door. So the instructors find themselves in the position of trying to discover diamonds, right? Not create them.
So how will these kids think and act and decide when they are emotionally and physically and psychologically bankrupt? How are they going to measure the risk to themselves, the risk to their teammates, the risk to the mission when they’re placed in very dangerous or uncertain environments?
Well, there’s a lot of ways you can probably get to those answers, but SEAL training elects for efficiency’s sake to manufacture stress and fear, right? It might be fear of heights, it might be fear of a water, cold water, deep water. It might be fear of quitting, fear of failure, fear that my girlfriend’s going to break up with me if I get punted out of SEAL training, right? But the question, are you afraid? Nobody cares about that. That’s not even the right question to ask, right?
The right question to ask is, why are you afraid and what are you going to do about it? Well, SEAL training provides students with daily opportunities to answer that question. So that 25 weeks is divided up into three phases, right? The first phase is seven weeks long and it’s the physical fitness, it’s the intensive physical fitness phase, seven weeks.
And the 120 of you or 130 of you that aren’t going to make it, that aren’t going to graduate 25 weeks later, we lose you in the first seven weeks. More specifically, we lose you in the first four weeks and most of that happens in that fourth week, right, which is Hell Week.
The second phase is eight weeks long, it’s called dive phase, where the students learn how to become proficient combat divers and swimmers. And the third phase is land warfare, where the kids get to shoot, they get to learn how to use applied explosive techniques, they learn small unit tactics and mission-specific skills.
But Darwin’s Big Cut, that fourth week, is where the litmus test for that character and all those questions. Much has been written about Hell Week, much has been said, but the best advice I’ve ever heard that would apply to students entering Hell Week was said by Winston Churchill. I love that he said, you know, if you wake up and you find yourself going through hell, keep going, right? And that’s simple and that’s the secret.
So Hell Week starts on a Sunday night and it ends on a Friday night. Five days straight, students are divided up into seven-man boat crews. They get the 300-pound rubber boat, they carry that boat with them everywhere they go, and it’s nonstop. You get two hours of sleep in five days, you are constantly cold and you are constantly wet, and you’re moved from one physical event to another, to another, to another for five days. Whether it’s a run or a swim or an obstacle course or you’re paddling out through the surf zone or you’re just sitting in the surf zone, that’s what happens for five days.
Really, the purpose of Hell Week is to simulate an environment, to simulate the stressors that these kids, if they graduate, may or will experience in combat. So you can’t plug these kids into combat and understand how they’ll act and decide, so you use Hell Week as a proxy for that. And you peel away all the emotions and all the psychology and all of their physical defenses to get to the answer to those important questions. Why are you here? What’s your value system?
And so, you see things that you wouldn’t even be able to wrap your mind around the students or take to a place in their mind where they’ve never been before, and they’re pushing up against this, what they think are their left and right limits, right? And if they do that long enough, most of them quit.
But the ones that take Winston Churchill’s advice and they keep pushing, and they push that left limit out, and they push the right limit out, and they keep going, those are the ones that make it and they learn a very critical skill during Hell Week because you’re going to be in that situation once you graduate, once you’re overseas, and once you’re in the middle of the melee. You’re giving a place in your mind where you’ve never been before, and you’re going to know what to do. You’re going to keep pushing, and you’re going to keep pushing, and you’re going to push left and you’re going to push right because that’s the only thing you know how to do. And in many cases, that’s the only option.
A funny story to help you appreciate Hell Week. So as a student, my boat crew and I, it was Thursday night, and the event was called Around the World. And what the students do is they get in the water with their boats on the ocean side of San Diego, they paddle up the coast, they paddle into the bay, and then they make their way south towards the south end of the bay, and it’s a race.
And you periodically paddle ashore to compete in some other shenanigans or some event, and then you race back into the ocean to continue paddling. And so by about 2 o’clock in the morning, you find yourself in the bay, and the lights from San Diego were kind of cascading off the water, and it plays funny tricks on your mind.
And so I was the third man back on the starboard side paddling. The kid in front of me pounces on the kid in front of him, inexplicably, and starts to chew on his shoulder, and he starts screaming. And so we grab this guy, and we have to dunk him in the water and pull him out. And as we pull him out, he’s screaming at the top of his lungs, Sir, sir, you’ve got to let me go! There’s a brownie on his shoulder! You can’t make that up. That’s good stuff.
And so these kids make it, these 30 or 40 make it, these diamonds, they get discovered, they make their way through. And now you’ve got a kid that, he just doesn’t know how to quit. I mean, you’d have to kill him now before he would quit. And these kids, after Hell Week, they only know two speeds, right? They know stop, and they know destroy.
And the rest of training for the instructors becomes an exercise in helping them build out a toolkit that includes a lot more than just stop and destroy, right, where there’s a lot of elegant solutions to very complicated problems that include faint left, faint right, back off, move forward, and a tail for another time.
And it all starts, whether we knew it or not, whether we liked it or not, it all started in kindergarten, this identifying character and building and developing character and leveraging fear, leveraging failure in an effort to build this character. So a big shout out to kindergarten teachers all over the globe, you have a great responsibility, and we are indebted to you, and a super shout out to Mrs. Packard, wherever you may be, you would have made a fine SEAL instructor.
Thank you for your time.
Want a summary of this talk? Here it is.
SUMMARY:
Kevin Williams’ talk, titled “Everything I Know I Learned in Kindergarten (and SEAL Training),” touches on key points that emphasize the importance of character and resilience in SEAL training. Here’s a summary of his talk:
In his talk, Kevin Williams reminisces about his kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Packard, who left a lasting impact on him. He recalls a childhood incident when he threw a snowball at a girl he had a crush on, inadvertently hurting another girl. Mrs. Packard didn’t scold him but instead asked, “Who do you want to be when you grow up?” This simple question planted the seed for a profound lesson: character matters more than actions.
Fast forward to Kevin’s role as a training officer for SEALs, and he realized that SEAL training was about building character above all else. The evolving nature of warfare meant that the specific skills SEALs needed could change, but character remained a constant. SEAL training sought to discover and nurture individuals with the right character traits.
Williams described Hell Week, a grueling five-day ordeal that tests SEAL candidates physically and mentally. It simulates the stress and challenges they might face in combat. During this week, candidates learn to push their limits and overcome fear, not by avoiding it but by understanding it and acting despite it.
He shared a humorous story from his own Hell Week experience to illustrate the extreme nature of the training. The goal of Hell Week is to identify and develop individuals who won’t quit, who only know two speeds: stop and destroy.
Williams emphasized that SEAL training couldn’t teach character but could reveal it. The instructors aimed to discover diamonds among the candidates, not create them. The resilience and character formed in the early stages of life, like in kindergarten, played a crucial role in determining a candidate’s success.
In conclusion, Kevin Williams’ talk underscores the significance of character in SEAL training. He recognizes the role of kindergarten teachers and educators in shaping character from a young age. SEALs aren’t just skilled professionals; they are individuals with unwavering character, ready to face adversity head-on. Mrs. Packard’s simple question laid the foundation for this profound understanding: who you are matters more than what you do. SEAL training, as described by Williams, is a testament to the enduring importance of character in shaping elite warriors.