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Home » Jennifer Nacif: The Secret to Motivating Your Child at TEDxSanDiego (Transcript)

Jennifer Nacif: The Secret to Motivating Your Child at TEDxSanDiego (Transcript)

Jennifer Nacif at TEDxSanDiego

Following is the full transcript of Speaker, Consultor, Coach Jennifer Nacif’s TEDx Talk: The Secret to Motivating Your Child at TEDxSanDiego 2014 conference.

Jennifer Nacif – Speaker, Consultor, Coach

I’m so excited!

Well, I’m excited not only to be in TEDxSanDiego, but to touch on my favorite subject: the secret to motivating your children. I mean we try to motivate, we do our best, but generally what do we do? We use fear: “Ah, if you don’t do this, mmm, big punishment.”

Or we bribe them: “OK, if you do this, you’ll get this prize, or this payment.” And, well it works, on the short term. But there are ramifications, consequences that we’re not aware of in the long run, when we educate in this manner.

So, today I want to ask you a question: How many of you would love to have a better relationship with your children? Raise your hands. Everyone, of course!

Now, a harder question: How many of you believe you know, exactly, how to motivate your children? Don’t worry, don’t feel bad, I don’t see any hands. Don’t take it personally.

My studies – I’ve been studying this for more than 20 years – are that less than 2% of parents have the exact answer to this question. The good news is: all of you, by the end of this talk, are going to know, exactly, in one word, how to motivate your children.

So, let me start by telling you a real story. I live in Mexico City and we were at a party, it was a girl’s 10th birthday; my friend has four daughters and they were behaving, not [badly], no, [terribly]! It came to a point that my friend was very tired and went to the four girls: “The four of you come here, either you behave well or we’re going to leave.” Oh, and let me mention, in Mexico the best part of a party is the piñata, the famous piñata (a figure filled with goodies). No kid wants to leave before the piñata.

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