Read the full transcript of fitness coach Kara Wutzke’s talk titled “The Key To Fitness Is Not What You Think” at TEDxGuangzhou 2021 conference. Here is the YouTube video link.
Listen to the audio version here:
TRANSCRIPT:
The Journey to Physical Transformation
KARA WUTZKE: At 35, I was in the best physical shape of my life. I trained for years as a natural bodybuilder and I had six-pack abs and muscles showing everywhere. It was my goal to find out what the body could achieve. So I ate the cleanest foods, I trained as smart and as hard as possible, and above anything else, I put my body first.
And it was my goal to share the key to physical transformation with everyone around me. So as you can see, my body on the outside looked pretty good, right? I looked pretty strong, fit, healthy, and amazing on the outside. But on the inside, something else was happening.
My body was, say, getting annoyed with me when I had certain things. It took me a while to figure out what was bothering me, but I realized when I had these two things, I would struggle and I would be in physical pain. It was milk and beer. So I was, fitness coach, okay, I must be allergic to milk or beer.
I got to tell you, I was really hoping it was the milk. So I went to the doctor, assuming I had a food allergy. What I wasn’t prepared for was bowel cancer. I was completely devastated.
At this point in my life, I’d been in the fitness industry for 15 years, living healthy, living strong. It’s what I did. It’s what I taught everyone around me. And more than that, it was who I was.
I was the strong coach, the coach that transformed everyone else’s bodies. Suddenly I’d gone from working out at the gym every day to not being able to move without being in pain. From being a champion to asking my children to put on my shoes for me because bending over hurt so much. For the first time in my life, I felt truly weak and I didn’t like it.
The Power of Empathy
So when I looked at the other patients around me, I didn’t see weakness. I didn’t judge them for being sick. I didn’t judge them for their few steps to recovery that they were taking. No, of course not.
I saw courage and I showed them kindness. So why for them and not myself? Suddenly I had to stop berating myself for everything that I couldn’t do. I had to be kind and understanding to myself, just like I did for others.
I had to set realistic and small goals and realize the road to recovery would be a long process and journey. I also had to rely on my family and community for emotional support and physical support, which I didn’t like so much, but I got used to it. What do you think I’m talking about here? Empathy.
Empathy is the ability to understand or share the feelings of one another. It’s the ability to imagine what someone else might be going through or feeling. How can empathy be the key to physical transformation? Let me show you.
Transformation is a long process. Okay? It’s a slow journey. We have to take it step by step.
I wish that I could just snap my fingers and you’d all hit your goals. Wouldn’t that be cool? But unfortunately, it’s a process where we need to set small goals and work towards our achievements. But, of course, there are bumps in the road.
So how do we reach our desired destination? Well, we have to accept and take those bumps in stride and just realize they’re part of the ride. When we can accept that bumps are part of our journey, they’re totally natural, we can empathize with ourselves. And when we hit those bumps, we can just keep moving forward.
Learning from Babies
Take babies, for example. Babies are the best. They’re so cute, they’re adorable, and we celebrate everything they do. No matter what, babies are constantly given love, encouragement, and support from everyone around them.
But we don’t expect babies to go from standing one moment to doing back flips the next. Although how cool would that be? No. First, they start to crawl. Then they stand. And then they walk. They literally take baby steps towards their goals. But it’s not without bumps, of course.
Babies stand, and then babies fall. Babies stand, they take one step, and they fall. Over and over again, we see this. We see the babies persevere. We recognize every small step and celebrate every win. And no matter what, we love and encourage them, no matter how many times they fall. Imagine if we laughed at a baby when it fell, or mocked it for the few steps it took. We wouldn’t do that, right?
Never. But it’s actually what we do to ourselves. When we are starting a new version of ourselves, wanting to transform or learn something new, we beat ourselves up. Instead, we need to shift that and look at the small steps we take, celebrate every small win, no matter how small, and be around people that love, encourage, and support us, and bring us back up, no matter how many times we fall.
Misty’s Transformation Story
This makes me think of a client I once had. Her name was Misty. She was one of my favorite clients. And I know you’re not supposed to have favorite clients, but you do.
And Misty was walking with her kids one day, walking along, and the kids decided they wanted to run, laugh, play, so they sped up, way ahead. And Misty couldn’t keep up with them. So Misty called out, she’s like, “Kids! Slow down! You’re going too fast!” And the kids are running along, they’re like, “No, Mom! You’re the one going too slow!” Boom!
That was Misty’s wake-up call.
That was the moment she knew she couldn’t live this way anymore. Misty was 35 kilos overweight, and she literally couldn’t keep up with her kids. Misty had tried to lose weight before, but like many of us, she set her expectations way too high.
And she tried to achieve so many goals at once, all or nothing. And every time she did that, she failed. How many of you have ever started a diet or fitness program to not achieve your goals and kind of feel like a failure? I know I have. It doesn’t feel good, right? So let’s shift that. One of Misty’s main goals was to be able to wear her wedding rings again. She hadn’t been able to wear them in years.
They didn’t fit anymore. And this was heartbreaking to her. But with such a long journey ahead, and so much weight to lose, where do you begin? Set realistic goals.
Too many times, I’ve seen people jump into the deep end with every goal in sight, and when they miss just even one target, they crash and burn and fail. This time, when Misty started, she knew she didn’t want to fail. She’d done it before, so she set realistic goals. First, all she did was take sugar out of her coffee.
One tiny thing, but it was manageable and achievable. Then she stopped drinking pop, or soft drink, sugary drinks. That was another big step for her, even though it seemed small. After that, she was able to play with her kids a little bit more and started playing these dance video games.
She’s dancing, having a good time with her kids. I hope she doesn’t dance like me. Horrible. She set small weight loss goals. She tracked her progress, and she kept a journal to make sure she stayed accountable. Step two, celebrate small wins. Misty celebrated every small win. So every pop she didn’t drink, every coffee without sugar that she did drink, she celebrated.
And she said, good on you, Misty. She gave herself kudos and a pat on the back. So for the weight that she lost and the weight she was now lifting, even small, she recognized the baby steps that she had taken and gave herself kudos for that. She celebrated these small wins, she tracked her progress, and she practiced positive self-talk.
But positive self-talk and being kind to yourself every day, all day, is really hard, right? I know I can’t do it. And that’s where step three comes in. Find a supportive community.
The Importance of Community
Often we need others to help show us the kindness and the encouragement that sometimes we can’t show ourselves. Remember, it’s not the baby that’s celebrating every small step. It’s not the baby picking itself up when it falls or celebrating every moment on social media. Imagine babies doing back flips, taking selfies.
How cool would that be? But no, it’s us. It’s the community that bring those babies up. Misty joins my fitness program, the K2 Fit Challenge.
Now, the K2 Fit Challenge is a community-based approach to fitness and to physical transformation. We not only encourage you to work out, we give meal plans, and most importantly, you have the support from our community members and our amazing coaching team. The most important part is that we are around-the-clock support of motivation, accountability, kindness, and encouragement with our community around the world. So when Misty joined our program, she definitely found the workouts hard sometimes and struggled with some of the exercises.
But we made sure to adjust those so she could take it one step at a time. We adjusted the exercises so that they were doable for her and she could feel that success. The community had her back too. She would check in with a group daily for encouragement and seeing her teammates work out, working hard, motivated her to do the same.
And on the days that Misty couldn’t celebrate or couldn’t empathize with herself, she had a safe space where she could ask for help, especially on the days when she didn’t want to work out. We’ve all had those days, right? But when Misty didn’t work out, she would let the community know and the community would help pick her back up, dust herself off, and say, “Hey, it’s okay, don’t worry about it. Tomorrow, you’ve got this.”
Giving her the confidence boost she needed the most. And it was a give-and-take relationship. So members would check in and they would share their successes, but they would also share their struggles and their perceived failures. And this allowed Misty to feel connected rather than alone, empathetic rather than disheartened.
And eventually, feeling supported and encouraged, Misty stepped up and she actually led a group in the community of 30 people to their goals. So while she continued on her own success, she helped others around her. When you have a supportive community, something magical happens. In fitness, success rates double.
I’ve seen it time and time again in the thousands of clients I’ve coached. But it’s not about the coach. It’s not about the workout program. It’s about the people. For Misty, setting these realistic goals, celebrating the small wins, and having this amazing community of support around her added up to massive change. This is Misty today. She’s amazing. She lost 35 kilos.
She’s smiling. She’s fit. She’s healthy. She’s happy, feeling good about herself, and playing with her kids. Oh, and yes, she’s wearing her wedding rings again. You would think hours of the gym, a no-excuse plan, and a restrictive diet was the key to physical transformation. You’d be wrong. So what’s the key to physical transformation?
The Key to Physical Transformation
Empathy. Cancer showed me that. Without empathy, I wouldn’t be here today. Without empathy, I wouldn’t have been able to show myself that kindness, to realize the road to recovery was going to be long if I didn’t set realistic goals, celebrate the small wins that I was achieving on the way.
And if I rejected the support of my family, my friends, and my fitness community, where would I be? Not here. Not here with you today. So who here wants to transform their life in some way, to live healthy, happy, fit? You’re happiest. Transform your life? Just a few of you? All the hands.
Yes. Like me, I want you to go at your goals, whatever they may be, with empathy, to take your own transformation one step at a time, and focus on what you have done, not what you can’t do. And rely on the people around you for support and encouragement to bring you up. You know, like babies.
You do not need to get cancer to understand and practice empathy, and I hope you never have to go through that. But like me, you deserve to hit your goals, no matter what they are. Here’s how. Thank you.
Thank you. Number one, set realistic goals. Two, celebrate the small wins, even if they’re like tiny, like way down here. All the goals, all the wins. And number three, find a supportive community, a network of people that want to bring you up, and you do the same. Do this. Do this empathetically, and change will come. Trust me. I’m a fitness coach.
