Thank you. I’m here with priceless advice for men: two rules that will blow your mind and change your life.
Follow these rules, and everything will go better, and a lot of the bad stuff that happens in a man’s life will not happen to you.
Rule number one: don’t be a dick! You know what I’m talking about: you’re hunk, you’re mean, you’re unkind, give somebody shit. “Hey, he called me a motherfucker so I stuck a knife in his leg.” Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick! Usually, a guy will have some excuse for being a dick, “She made me do it,” “He shouldn’t have talked to me that way,” “She wrecked my car.” There are no excuses for being a dick.
None at all. No excuses for a guy. Don’t be a dick! – rule number one.
What’s rule number two? Don’t be a pussy! You whine, you complain, you give in, “Sure, your parents could come stay for eight weeks! I don’t mind” “Oh, yeah! I’ll pay an extra 10,000 dollars for that car if you say it’s worth it; that’s fine with me” “Oh, yeah! You can cut my hours 50% to hire your brother-in-law.” I understand that’s being a pussy. A man gets in touch with his principles, plans his step, looks somebody in the eye, and stands up for what’s right. Don’t be a pussy! – rule number two. So, don’t be a dick! Don’t be a pussy.
What’s left if you’re not a dick, and you’re not a pussy? A good guy! The kind of man that women want and other men admire. Now, you’re never going to stop being a dick. You’ll screw up, catch yourself, screw up, catch yourself. That’s a man’s life, but you can be a dick less and less. And you’re never going to stop being a pussy either.
You complain, you let somebody pussywhip your bully, but then you’ll catch yourself. “Not going to be a pussy,” “I’m going to stand up for what’s right,” and you can be a pussy less and less. And if you’re a dick less and less, and a pussy less and less, you’re going to be a good guy more and more and more. Follow these rules, and your life is going to be 100 times better than if you don’t follow these rules. Priceless advice for men.
Thank you very much.