Here is the full transcript and summary of Karen Faith’s talk titled “How To Talk To The Worst Parts Of Yourself” at TEDxKC conference.
In this TEDx talk, people researcher and empathy trainer Karen Faith discusses how to talk to the worst parts of yourself in a way that is both honest and rational. She notes that therapy or other forms of self-care can be helpful in managing hard thoughts and feelings. Ultimately, she advocates for an open mind and gratitude for all aspects of the self.
Listen to the audio version here:
It isn’t true what they say, that you can’t love anyone until you love yourself. Have you heard that? People say you have to learn to love yourself before you can love anybody else. But it’s not true. I loved everybody before I loved myself. Love doesn’t care which way you come or what state you’re in when you get here. Love welcomes everyone unconditionally. Oddly, so do focus group moderators, which is how and why I learned to do it.
If you’ve never been a part of a focus group, you’re missing a really special cultural experience. So, in every focus group, there’s a range of characters, right? There’s always a shy one and a chatty one, a grumpy one that doesn’t want to do any of the exercises, and a very excited mom with a notebook, who wants to get an A plus in all of the exercises. There’s a student who lied on the intake because they need the money, and a dad full of jokes who can’t read the room.
And usually, there’s one ex-military guy who keeps staring at the two-way mirror suspiciously. It’s a situation where a group of people that may not otherwise ever meet have the chance to share their perspectives. And it’s my job as the moderator to make sure that they all get heard.
Now, it’s not quite a classroom. It’s not group therapy. And while the community feel has some elements of holiness, probably no one would call it a spiritual experience. I mean, no one else. Because moderating rooms of strange and difficult voices is what taught me to welcome all the strange and difficult parts of myself. No kidding.