Transcript: Miranda Lambert on Joe Rogan Podcast #2402

But she’s cowgirl and she’s everybody. She’s a badass. And became friends with her and I just never had the guts to go do it, you know? And finally my husband was like, “stop talking about it and go out there and do it. Go out there and shoot with her. You’ll love it.”

JOE ROGAN: Wow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And I got addicted immediately. It’s just something different.

JOE ROGAN: Well, it’s very wild west, right? It’s essentially training how to fight with a gun on a horse.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. That’s all it is, except it’s balloon as the perpetrator.

JOE ROGAN: But I mean, that’s how you would train, right, without killing people.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And it’s, you know, just something that started a new hobby at 40. It’s just try to preoccupy my mind and, I don’t know, I think it inspires me to take a break from thinking about what I think about every single day, which is music industry, you know, so just trying new things and saying, “what the hell, let’s go for it.”

The Importance of Hobbies for Artists

JOE ROGAN: I think that’s very good for artists. I try to talk to comedians about that all the time. I’m like, pick up something, man. Hobbies are, play golf, go fishing, do something. For me, I play pool, do something.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I just started golf too. I’m in my try new things era.

JOE ROGAN: There you go. You try new things.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes, my yes era. Sure, I’ll do it. Try to golf. Not too great yet, but I did, I just played the Ryder Cup.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, nice.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They had a celebrity. Somebody heard I played golf and when they heard that, I literally started that day.

JOE ROGAN: Jamie’s a nut. And I was a full on golf nut.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I literally was cramming my a off this September because I was on tour all summer and I didn’t have time to practice. And you know how that feels. Golf is, you have to practice and you have a coach. I had a coach. Yes, Dan, I have a coach and he came with me as my caddy. Very helpful. But it was an experience. It was a lot of pressure.

JOE ROGAN: Did you feel it even though nobody expected you to win?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I mean, I just felt like, what the hell have I done? When I got there, it’s like doing something you don’t do in front of people. A lot of people.

JOE ROGAN: But you don’t do it. You just don’t do it a lot.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, and I do things in front of people. But it’s singing.

JOE ROGAN: You do things in front of people and you’re really good at it. That’s the difference.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, that’s the thing. Doing something that you suck at in front of people is a very scary place to be.

JOE ROGAN: Right. Right. Jamie has O.J. Simpson’s golf clubs. A couple of them. Not all of them. I have a few. How many do you have? It’s not really awesome at all. They’re haunted.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Whatever you’re into.

JOE ROGAN: How many you got? Three? No, I mean, I got a whole set, but do you use them? I use one of them.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Did you hit?

JOE ROGAN: Well, I have. That’s why I used it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Blaster cars.

JOE ROGAN: Well, he bought it as a goof. Yeah. I just want to talk about it. It’s a fun, just one of those things. Conversation starter that came up. Did you get him after he died?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, yeah.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, I got him six months ago. Yeah, I forgot. I forgot when he died a couple years ago.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, that’s cool.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, hey, I guess. But it is really important having some kind of a thing that you do to take your mind off of the business. Because the people that I know where their mind is only on show business, whatever it is, music, comedy, whatever it is, they go crazy. You can eventually get lost in your own little world. You need a little break.

Living Life to Write About It

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You do. And I think it’s, you know, especially if you’re a writer, you got to go live to write about it or what are you writing about? Same s* you already said, you know.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s like, I need to go live a life and gather information and be around different people and sort of open my circle up to just, I don’t know, different experiences. Yeah. Different environment.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, my friend Ari does that. He disappears for three months every year and a half or so. And he gets rid of his phone, gets rid of his email.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He goes off grid.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, he goes off grid. He goes to Asia. He backpacks through Asia. And he’s famous. He’s a famous comedian and he doesn’t give a f*. He just goes and vanishes. We can’t find him. No one knows where he is. I don’t hear from him for three, four months. I just hope he’s alive.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Does it change him?

JOE ROGAN: Oh, yeah. He comes back weird. He’s weird already. He’s weird as well.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He’s weirder.

JOE ROGAN: He’s weirder when he comes back because he’s, you know, been living in foreign countries for, you know, a long time.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I’m not, I mean, I’m just shooting balloons and swinging a golf club. Nothing as cool as that.

JOE ROGAN: But the thing you’re doing, the thing about both of those things is they require all of your focus while you’re doing. I mean, if you’re riding a giant animal while you’re shooting a gun, there’s no room for thinking about, “oh, I got to do laundry.” You know, there’s no room. You’re just doing that thing only.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, that’s what I think I loved about it and got addicted to.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You know, and I guess I don’t really have, I always say I don’t have an adrenaline junkie in me, but I guess I have to have a little bit for joining the circus, I do. You know.

JOE ROGAN: Yes, you do. It’s kind of joining the circus.

The Mental Benefits of Shooting Sports

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. So, I think that just that little focus and the little jolt that you get of the same kind of high we get after a show. I still guess I need that, but just in a different form.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Joining the rodeo. There’s something about shooting at things, too. I do archery. And there’s something about shooting at things that also just really cleans your mind because in that moment, while you’re pulling a trigger, there’s no room for anything else. If you’re trying to hit a target, there’s no room for anything else. And it just pushes all that stuff away. It gives you a little mental vacation.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, 100%.

JOE ROGAN: And then you come back cleaner.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What kind of bow are you shooting?

JOE ROGAN: I shoot a compound bow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Compound bow?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. The Hoyt?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I used to shoot bows. I have a long time.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, really?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I got them back out during 2020 when I had all the time in the world, and my husband’s from New York City, so I was like, I got these bows. I’ll teach you how to shoot a bow. So we just set up the targets and got them all fixed up, and it was fun. I mean, it is fun. It’s the same thing I think you’re talking about. It’s very similar focus. It’s just, even if it’s just for a little while, it’s that little moment in time that this is all I’m doing right now.

Bow Hunting and Raising a Baby Deer

JOE ROGAN: Right. Have you ever bow hunted?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I used to be a hunter. Yeah. I did hunt it for a long time. My dad.

JOE ROGAN: Tree stand.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yep. Or ground blind. Either way.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Bow hunting was my absolute favorite to do because it took the focus and it was intimate. And it took a lot of skill and practice, certainly, to make sure you’re going to.

JOE ROGAN: Whitetail.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Whitetail.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, nice.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But I raised a baby deer, a buck.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, that’s a problem.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yep, that’s a problem. So my hunting days are behind me. Peace on my heart.

JOE ROGAN: We found a buck with a broken leg on our property, and my wife took to feeding it. And all of her enthusiasm for me hunting kind of went out the window.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It changes things.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Because it’s kind of like a dog.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He was just like a dog.

JOE ROGAN: They’re sweet right up to you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Wild a whitetail deer became like my pet.

JOE ROGAN: And it’s different than any other feral animal in that they domesticate like that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They really do. He was literally, I’d come home and he would run over to me like a dog. So definitely changed my mind.

JOE ROGAN: Well, I think it’s because they’re dumb, unfortunately. I think nature has them set up to be not very intelligent and just food. And he’s a beautiful food thing. That’s really what they are.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. My dad, I grew up hunting with him. Taught me how to shoot a gun, all that stuff at 17. And when I raised that buck, he was like, it’s over, isn’t it?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s over. It’s over. Yeah. I’ll never raise a baby elk, I’ll tell you that. Don’t do it. But I get it. I mean, we have deer in our neighborhood. And I see these little cute babies that are born every year. And we stop the car. Oh, my God.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Especially in Texas. They’re everywhere.

JOE ROGAN: Everywhere. Yeah. And there’s not any predators out here. So there’s these deer all over the place and they’re just super, unless they get hit by a car, I don’t know what happens.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re not affected anymore.

JOE ROGAN: No. But they are beautiful. And it’s just cool to have animals around. Just, it’s cool to be at least in some kind of form of nature.

The MuttNation Foundation

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes. I’m such an animal lover. I mean, I don’t do well. That’s why I brought your dog toys. I don’t know. It’s part of who I am is to have especially dogs. That’s my heart.

JOE ROGAN: Me, too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have a foundation called MuttNation Foundation. I started with my mom in 2009, and so far we’ve raised over $11 million since then. It was a little mom and pop operation back in the day, but it just has been my heart since I was a little girl.

I think growing up in the country where there’s just animals everywhere, whether it’s deer or stray dogs or stray cats or whatever. I think it just kind of prepped me for when you get a platform and someone’s like, what do you want your charity to be? It’s like, oh, I know what it’s going to be.

JOE ROGAN: So what does your charity do?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: We rescue. Well, we advocate for Rescue MuttNation Foundation. We don’t have shelters. We lift up the arms of shelters is what we say. Because my mom and dad were private investigators my whole life. And so my mom, just because we started rescuing dogs just when I was a little girl, you live in the country, people dump them off and whatever. Started adopting some from the shelter as a teenager and volunteering.

And so she sort of started vetting shelters just because that’s her background, checking up on people, make sure they’re doing what they’re supposed to. And so in 2009, it was like, oh, I kind of started to get a name for myself. And you need to pick something that you’re passionate about that you want to give back to.

So we started it. And basically, we advocate for spay and neuter, we advocate for adopt, don’t shop, and we raise money to give to shelters all over the country. Every year, we give a $5,000 grant to a shelter in every state and try to not repeat. So there’s just so many that need help, and there’s so many amazing animals out there. We just try to remind people there’s amazing animals out there that you don’t have to go buy one.

JOE ROGAN: If my wife is allergic and one of my daughters are allergic, you still have two dogs. But if that wasn’t the case, I’d have 50 dogs. I can’t.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But yours are not non-shedders.

JOE ROGAN: What’s that?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yours are shedders, though, right?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, they shed. Yeah. You just keep them clean. She’s not nearly as bad as when I first met her. When I first met her, she really would get hives if she pet the dogs. But also, I was not that good at washing my dogs, and they were always in the yard playing around, and they’re always dirty.

But if you don’t have dogs, dogs are like extra love. You have, your love in your life will be, whatever the levels at now, it’ll be 35% higher.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: 100% agree, for sure. I’m allergic to everything. I love horses, cats, dogs.

JOE ROGAN: You’re allergic to horses?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: All of it. I live on Allegra.

JOE ROGAN: Wow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m just popping Allegra to enjoy my life, but I don’t care. It’s worth it.

Dealing with Allergies in Texas

JOE ROGAN: One of my daughters is so allergic that we went to Rome once and we were on this horse driven, they have these tourist things you do. You sit in the back of a wagon. The horse drags around the city. And just being downwind of the horse, her eyes were swelling up. We had to get off the horse and walk the rest of the way. Then we had to find a pharmacy.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Terrible.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, it was bad. She’s got it bad.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Did she do shots or anything?

JOE ROGAN: She did that. She did the whole thing, but they hated it. And when my wife stopped doing shots, then all of her allergies got way better, and she was doing shots because Texas has a lot of allergens. A lot of people that come from places like California, you don’t realize it. You come here and then you get whammied.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I was sneezing all the way over here because I just landed.

JOE ROGAN: You get them, too. You get them, too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I just, I live in Nashville half the time and Austin half the time, and it’s the two worst places for allergies.

JOE ROGAN: Are they really?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. It doesn’t matter.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, I didn’t know Austin was that bad. And I didn’t get them at all until really probably last year I started getting them.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: How long have y’all been here?

JOE ROGAN: Five years, almost six. So last year, I started getting sore throats. I was like, am I getting sick? What the f* is going on? Then I went to Vegas for the UFC. No sore throat. Came back. Sore throat again. I’m like, oh, damn it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s an allergy.

JOE ROGAN: It’s an irritation. Because it didn’t make any sense. I was like, I feel good. I feel really healthy. But this thing in my throat’s bugging me. I’m like, maybe I just got to be careful. Maybe I’m fighting off a cold because I didn’t want to admit it. I was like, everybody else is getting allergies. I’m not getting.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But it makes sense if you’re not used to the trees and the grass here. I mean, it’s a whole new ecosystem that you have to get used to.

JOE ROGAN: But the weird thing they say it takes three years before it hits you. And I was like, shut up. That doesn’t make any sense. But it’s true. Yeah, it’s true. Seems to be true. Seems to get you after three years.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: So what do you do about it?

JOE ROGAN: Nothing. Just deal with it. I feel my body’s going to adapt. I feel like if I just let my body deal with whatever these are and understand what they are, it’ll figure it out. I took a lot of vitamins. It’ll be fine. And it seems to be better. This year, I got a couple sniffles a few days in a row where I was thinking I had a cold, and then I realized it was high. Something mold or f*ing cedar or whatever.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: The hell it is. You just didn’t have to pay attention to it before.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, I guess. But whatever that is, all the positives about living here greatly outweigh it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I love it, too.

JOE ROGAN: This place rules.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It does. I’m glad y’all are here. You came in 2020 then, right?

JOE ROGAN: Yep.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yep. My little brother lives here, and his husband Mark, and he went to UT and never came home. Our little town, Lindale, Texas, representing today, it’s about 80 miles east of Dallas. And so I bought a place here in 2017 and spend a lot of time in Austin.

JOE ROGAN: It’s great.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s a great town.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, we should probably stop talking about how great it is, because people want to move here.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, it’s not that great. There’s a lot of allergies.

JOE ROGAN: Guys. Yeah, guys, stay home. Don’t sneeze. I talked to a lot of people into moving here, and I think I’m done talking to people. We’re good.

The Comedy Scene Migration to Austin

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, Nashville’s our other city. That’s happening, too, but more the merrier, really.

JOE ROGAN: Well, the thing about Austin is it wasn’t really much of a comedy scene. There was one comedy club that closed before I moved here. It had already closed before the pandemic. I guess at the beginning of the pandemic, it went under, and so the comedy scene here was kind of empty.

When we moved here and we started doing shows here, it was one of the only places in the country we could do live indoor shows. And we were like, f it. And then comedians just started moving here because they were convinced that LA was never going to open. And once I was here and Ron White was here, Tony Hinchcliffe was here, everybody was like, well, let’s f it. I want to live. I don’t want to be trapped in my house and not be able to perform for a year and a half or whatever it’s going to be.

First Show Back After Lockdown

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, that’s great. My first show back, I think it was after, like, 332 days of no shows, no bus rides.

JOE ROGAN: What did it feel like?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Billy Bob’s in Fort Worth. Because like you said, Texas was like, what Covid? We’re going to go do stuff. We’re going to honky tonk right now. Yeah, so we did a little residency at Billy Bob’s.

JOE ROGAN: Nice.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: We did five shows. And yeah, I mean, but I had it before. I had it before we even knew what it was. On the road, I was around so many people on tour. And before we knew it, I had this thing. None of my tricks worked with all my finger tricks, like steroid shot, B12, vocal rest. Just couldn’t shake it. And then a month later it’s like, oh, that’s because it’s something real bad we’ve never heard of. I had to cancel shows. It’s terrible.

But the first show back was, I had five in a row, but the first one was just rowdy and so old school honky tonk feeling. I was crying. It was just a cool moment.

JOE ROGAN: It feels weird, right?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It was good to miss it, though.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, that’s true.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It was really good to miss it. I never had a chance to. I never stopped. Country music especially, we just don’t. We just tour around. Weekend warriors, make a record, tour it for two years, do it again, repeat, rinse, repeat. And I’ve been doing this since I was 17, so just years and years of not knowing if I could miss it, just grinding. And I did. I mean, I was like, dang, I miss my bus. I miss the road, which I wasn’t sure would happen.

JOE ROGAN: Right, because it’s so grinding.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is. It’s hard. And so yeah, I was happy to be back, but now it’s back harder than ever. It’s just, it’s a different. It hits different after 40. You don’t recover as quickly.

Taking Time Off and Recharging

JOE ROGAN: Do you ever carve out vacation times? Like, say like for the month of December? I’m not doing shit.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, that’s the winter. Like last year I went to Arizona. I went to Phoenix area and rode with all those cowgirls shooting guns off horses. And I was just so rejuvenated and refreshed and I was like, I need to make that a priority. I just think none of us are good at that. If you’re really driven and really goal oriented, I have to make myself.

And then I’ll go and say, well, they’re working me to death. They as me. I’m the one adding shit to my calendar. That is me. My husband’s like, you said you were going to be off this week. Like, well, I had this one. So I really am making like the priority. Take some winter months because we start touring in the spring and don’t stop till the winter again. So I feel like it’s important.

JOE ROGAN: It’s important, it’s intelligent.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: It’s an intelligent thing to do to give yourself a forced vacation, some sort of a break. So just think of your creativity as like a battery. You can’t run your phone until it’s got zero. You got to charge it. So stick it in the cable, put it into the wall, let it charge for a little while. You got to think about it that way, I guess.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What do you do for your chill time?

JOE ROGAN: I don’t do a lot of chilling.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I didn’t think so.

JOE ROGAN: I just do other stuff.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Same. I was like, I feel like you’re preaching to the choir over here.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, I watch TV. I like to watch documentaries and stuff. And I watch fights and I watch YouTube videos, but I can’t do it much or I just don’t like that feeling. I feel like I’m wasting time so I have to keep myself up to do other things.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, that’s the thing. It’s like I’m not just going out there to chill out on the couch. I’m in the desert doing something physical also. Musicians, our life isn’t that physical. We don’t. It’s kind of as far as activity. We’re sitting around writing songs, we’re sitting around practicing. We’re standing there until the show part. So I have to make sure my hobbies should be active.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You know, sure.

JOE ROGAN: Just, and also do something that active stuff stimulates your mind more. And I think active stuff will probably aid in your writing more. Right?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I think so.

JOE ROGAN: It has to. I mean, it just makes sense.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

The Songwriting Process

JOE ROGAN: When you sit down to, do you sit down right in front of a computer? Do you wait till an idea comes to you? Do you write on a piece of paper? How do you?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: All of it usually. I love to co-write. Writing by myself, I’m not good at it. I encourage it for any artists I’m mentoring or anything else. But I need to do it myself more because co-writing is fun. You’re hanging around with, which I met you actually at one of my favorite writers benefit, Jack Ingram. Him and John Randall is my other best friend. And I think you met him too. We have a little side project we call the Marfa Tapes. And we would go out to the desert in Marfa, which is, have you been there yet?

JOE ROGAN: No.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is like a different world.

JOE ROGAN: That’s what Rick Rubin says.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is a different, literal, different world. And there’s so, it’s magical. I don’t know what’s in the air out there, but.

JOE ROGAN: How far is the drive?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Like, five miles from here? About six and a half.

JOE ROGAN: Six and a half.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Is that coffee?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. You want some?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Anyway, we’ll sit around and JR is amazing guitar player. Cheers. Thank you. He’ll come up with a riff or somebody has a title. That’s why I like co-writing. I don’t know. It’s more fun to celebrate it with your friends. You know what I mean?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, for sure. I mean, some of the best ideas that comedians ever come up with, we come up with in the green room because we’re just riffing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: There’s always a moment, we’re hanging around and Tony will say something. We’re like, dude, write that down. Write that down.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Same thing. The exact same thing.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Yeah. Well, it’s like, you know, creativity is interesting because you want to be inspired, and you’re never more inspired than you are around other creative people.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Especially people that are better than you.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, for sure. Right? Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s like, I’m like, oh, you’re a really great writer and great musician. We should be friends. I need to learn from you, and you make me look cool.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. It kicks up your desire to do better a notch.

Working With Young Artists

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Especially, I’ve been working with younger artists, and I love seeing their fire. They’re like racehorses at the gate, you know? And it reminds me of how that felt and reminds me to find my moments where I feel that way, too.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, that’s great. Yeah. I feel the same way about working with young comedians. It’s important. It’s good. It’s also great to see the sparkle in their eye when they do their first big crowd. Come on, man. This is just like a regular club. Go out there, give me some knuckles, right? And you see, watch them kill in front of thousands of people. And they come back like, whoa.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And you’re like, oh, now you got the bug.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, now you got. Well, they had the bug already. But it’s like you get to feel it. I get to feel it again for the first time. I’ve done it so many times, it’s almost kind of normal, which it never should be normal, you know, and you get to see somebody else experience the jolt of what it feels like that spotlight in your face and all those people in the crowd. And it’s exciting.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is. And it’s good. It’s a reminder, you know? I think it’s so important. People ask you this. Do you get nervous? I get, I don’t get nervous. I get.

JOE ROGAN: Anticipation.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, that’s a great word. I don’t know. I’m going to start saying that because I was like, I don’t really have an answer because I care and I want to do well, and I get this. It’s anticipation. It’s not nerves, per se.

JOE ROGAN: I think once you stop feeling something, really, you’re doing the wrong thing, no matter what it is. I’m sure you feel that whenever you get on one of those horses with a gun in your hand.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I haven’t stopped feeling anything yet.

JOE ROGAN: Here we go.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: This is crazy. I’m still feeling all those feels for a while, I’m sure.

JOE ROGAN: I don’t know if that’ll ever go away. Right. Because, you know, you’re not in control of the horse, and it’s not.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No, it’s not up to you. And I think that’s why I like it, because I have grown to trust me in my gig. I trust me, I trust my band. But mostly it’s up to me. I’m the one standing there in front of the microphone, and I know my capabilities, and I know what I can deliver.

On a hobby like golf, I’m like, I don’t know what the hell’s about to happen when I swing this club. This is not up to me. This little son of a bitch isn’t moving, and I can’t hit it. And the same thing with the horse. It’s up to my horse. It’s not up to me. You know, I can aim and I can have the skill and be learning how to ride. But it’s about him, you know?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, for sure. That’s his name?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: With a K or a C?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s a C. He’s cool.

JOE ROGAN: That’s a great Morris Day in the Time song.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: You never heard that song?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Cool.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, it’s a great song.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I need to hear it. We have a theme song. I didn’t know it.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, we’ll give her some of that. We’ll have to cut this out. Otherwise we’ll get removed from YouTube. But play Morris Day in the Time.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Cool.

Morris Day and the Time

JOE ROGAN: This is during the Prince days. Morris Day in the Time, I think is one of the most underappreciated bands from that era. From the early 90s. Because they got kind of eclipsed by Prince. Because they were hanging around with Prince and they were part of the whole Prince. I don’t know anything you don’t know about Morris Day in the Time.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, my God. Played Cool by Morris Day in the Times. I’m making sure it’s the right one. I got a version that says it’s just Morris Day. And then another version popped up that said it was just the Time. So maybe either way, it’s always going to be Morris Day singing. I don’t think the Time ever played without Morris. Morris is cool as f*, though. Here it is. All right, we’ll edit this out for people at home. Sorry. Go find us. Is it great?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Look at the clothes.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, it’s so corny. It’s so great. It’s so, what year is that? I don’t know. It’s got to be early 90s, right? 91.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: 81.

JOE ROGAN: 81. Wow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I wasn’t even born on the earth.

JOE ROGAN: That’s crazy. 1981. Wow. I was a freshman in high school.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m an 83 baby.

JOE ROGAN: I was in my junior year or sophomore year. Yeah, I was a freshman in high school back then. That’s crazy. Wow. There’s a weird time back then because Prince was so big that there was a bunch of fake princes. People started imitating Prince. It’s almost always what happens. Androgynous.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: There’s one. And then they’re like, oh, let’s all be like that one. So there’s 20 more that aren’t as good.

The Prince Phenomenon

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. A bunch of fake Michael Jacksons. I’m sure there was a bunch of people that just tried to do something like, what is he? What’s that guy doing? And with Prince, it was like, what is this? What’s happening here?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Very uniquely authentic.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Authentically himself. So even that was trying to be too close probably a little bit. You know what I mean?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Not as good. That’s the problem. You’re not as good as Prince. You’re awesome, you’re great. But Prince is a once in a generation superstar weirdo talent from Mars.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Exactly. There are those. There’s some that just aren’t from here.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, right. That guy was just different than everybody. I remember I was delivering newspapers when I first heard a Prince song. And I was like, this is crazy. Who is this guy? It was “I Want to Be Your Lover.” Do you remember that? That fing song? And it was like, this is a guy singing like a girl on stage. He’s 3 feet tall, and all the women want to f him. This is nuts. I have never seen anything like this in my life.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What’s happening?

JOE ROGAN: What did this guy do? This guy’s a sorcerer. He was so talented that he could wear stilettos on stage, and no one cared. And it wasn’t like, boo, what are you dressing like a girl? No one gave a f*. He was so good. And so there’s something about the magnetic personality that he had. There was the charisma that he had was so undeniable that everybody was like, holy shit, what is this?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s not taught. That’s innate. That’s you’re born with that.

JOE ROGAN: You can’t teach Prince. How do you teach that?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No, you don’t. You grew up in Jersey, right?

JOE ROGAN: I was born in New Jersey.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I was born in Jersey, but I…

JOE ROGAN: Only lived there till I was six.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Where’d you grow up?

Growing Up Everywhere

JOE ROGAN: I grew up everywhere. I lived in San Francisco from 7 to 11. I lived in Gainesville, Florida, from 11 to 13.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Lots of moving.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, a lot of moving. And then I lived in Boston from 13 to 24. Then I lived in New York.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: New York City.

JOE ROGAN: No, I couldn’t afford parking, so I had to live outside the city. Because I’m a comedian, I had to drive everywhere. I had a lot of road gigs. That’s where I made my money.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: So to drive to Connecticut and Rhode Island, in the city, it was like a parking spot was hundreds of dollars a month back then. So I lived in New Rochelle.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Okay, cool. My husband was NYPD. He retired after eight years, but because I dragged him down to Tennessee and now Texas. And now he says “y’all.”

JOE ROGAN: Does he? He says “y’all” unironically. How long has he been there?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: We’ve been married seven years.

JOE ROGAN: Okay. After five, you’re not faking it anymore.

Life in New York City

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But I got to live up there. When we first got married, we had an apartment, SoHo. And I’m from BFE, Lindale, Texas. Dallas is our biggest city, and it’s 80 miles. So I had so much fun. He was still a cop, so I just wander around all day. I had gigs on the weekends, but Monday through Wednesday, I’m just like Desperate Housewives of SoHo, running around and going to rock clubs by myself and having lunch by myself and having wine, meet people. And it’s just a city that nobody cares who you are at all. They’re just like…

JOE ROGAN: It’s an amazing city. It’s amazing if you like cities.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, I like visiting.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Six months was, I got my fill. I loved it. We’re there a ton because his family’s still there. But I just enjoyed really immersing because I’d never done that. And I’m not really a city girl, but I was like, I’m just going to use every bit of this that I can. Wrote some great songs. Wrote one called “Fire Escape.” I didn’t even know what that was before. You know what? The fire escape. You can walk out the door. So it was cool. It was a cool time.

JOE ROGAN: Well, that would be a great place to rewire your brain creatively to write stuff. Because you’re forced in a totally different environment.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: In the weirdest environment on earth, in my opinion. I think the weirdest environment on earth for human beings is when they’re stacked on top of each other in cities.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Because I don’t think that’s normal at all.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No, it’s not.

JOE ROGAN: I think your whole body just goes, you’re always at three or four all day long. Always, never at zero.

The Stress of City Life

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes. My husband just now, we literally talked about yesterday, I was like, you are finally at a regulated nervous system level. Because I think you just used to just, you have to vibrate at a different energy, especially if you’re a police officer. That’s a whole different, you know what I mean? And so finally, we have a farm in Tennessee and we are there for a couple days this week and just chilling, making cookies and being normal. And it’s like he’s finally enjoying that. Because even when I had my little time in New York City, I was like, this is a lot. I couldn’t do this 24/7 for long periods of time because I just can’t come down and ground myself.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I need to touch grass.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, I do too. Being a cop in New York City has got to be one of the most stressful jobs in the history of the world.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I think so.

JOE ROGAN: That’s, I mean, that’s right up there, below being a soldier in war. Being a cop. I mean, I have friends that are cops or that were cops that will tell you that the people that are working in the field, as police officers, and they’re going and seeing things on a daily basis, they’re seeing way more carnage, way more f*ed up things than these guys who had served. They were both. They did both. They were like, I saw way more as a cop than I ever did as an officer.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It makes sense. It’s a lot. I mean, his whole family, police officers. My whole family is firemen and police officers too. So I think that was kind of our bond anyways. Just kind of, we grew up exactly the same, just in different parts of the country.

The Reality of Police Work

JOE ROGAN: Well, I was around a lot of cops when I was a kid because of martial arts. We were always training with cops. And I’d listen to stories that they would tell me about things that they got into and they were getting into things on a daily basis. There’s always shootout, there was always car wrecks, there was always murders and domestic violence cases. And it’s like, man, how many of those guys are just walking around with severe PTSD and no one cares, no one respects, no one’s talking about it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re just, you know, I think that they don’t even acknowledge it themselves. I know my dad worked vice in Dallas for his whole career and back in the day, and my husband, they just don’t. And then they just come home and…

JOE ROGAN: I’d kill my hearing aids, too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He’s like, the dog ate it. I guarantee you. He just threw it away.

JOE ROGAN: Put peanut butter on that f*ing thing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Good job, Recliner. We know what you did now. He put peanut butter on it. That’s just wrong. It’s just wrong so many ways.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, man, he probably needed peace and quiet.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, he needs mom to hush.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, everybody shut the f*ing world off. You know, one of the greatest pool players, if not the greatest pool player of all time, is deaf. There’s a guy named Shane Van Boening, and he shuts his hearing aid off when he plays.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: So it’s just silent.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, just f* off, world. And he’s just in it. People could be screaming in the crowd. He doesn’t hear shit.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What is it about pool? What’s the, you said you play pool. You like it?

JOE ROGAN: I’ve been playing pool for 35 years. Yeah. I’ve been playing forever.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But what is it about that particular…

The Mental Game of Pool

JOE ROGAN: Because the balls don’t give a f* who you are. They don’t care what you think you are. They don’t care who you know, how much money you have, what you’ve accomplished already, how many shots you’ve already made. The balls don’t care. The pockets are four and a quarter inches wide. And if you don’t hit it perfect, it doesn’t go in. And it requires all of your concentration.

And if you really know how to play pool, then you’re dealing with English. So you’re dealing with spin on the cue ball left and right, and you’re dealing with draw and follow. It’s a dance of the mind. And these orbs, you’re hitting a ball into another ball and trying to get that thing to go straight. And it just requires this complete harmony of hand eye coordination and your spirit. You have to stay calm while you’re doing it. That’s why.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s a very good explanation of that. I’m the worst pool player. I mean, you would think, playing as many honky tonks as I have played that I could play pool.

JOE ROGAN: Most people so bad that think they could play pool can’t play pool. Most people don’t know really how to play pool.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Back in my day, it was just a place to flirt.

JOE ROGAN: The thing about pool is once you get down the road and you start understanding, you get, you really start getting the game and understanding. And then playing in tournaments and then gambling, then you’re dealing with real pool players. And these real pool players play pool eight hours a day.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Wow.

JOE ROGAN: Every day. You have to. Because you know how the thing of being comfortable on stage or being comfortable riding a horse, being comfortable shooting a bow or playing golf, multiply that times 100 and you have pool. Because pool is the only game where you take a stick and you hit a ball into another ball. Every other game you hit a ball, you just hit a ball with a stick.

But in pool, you’re hitting a ball into a ball and controlling the movement of both balls. The one that’s hitting the ball, you’re controlling how it spins off to get perfect position on the next shot and then the other one, you want to make sure that gets the exact right angle to go into the pocket. While you’re calculating all this spin and the geometry of the table and avoiding collisions. It’s maddening.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I just got anxiety. It’s maddening, got stressed out.

Being in Dead Stroke

JOE ROGAN: It’ll drive you crazy. It’s a game that will drive you crazy. But when you catch it, there’s a thing called being in stroke and being in dead stroke. It’s a rare thing. It happens once a month or something like that, where you just can’t miss, where you know where everything is. And it’s this calm that comes over. The world dissolves, and all you feel is the table and you’re completely in sync with the movement of the balls.

You know how many revolutions each ball is going to make. You feel the difference between two extra revolutions. You know where, how hard to hit it. Exactly. And that’s what everybody’s chasing. They’re chasing this feeling of being.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Why does it happen once a month?

JOE ROGAN: Because it’s so hard to get there. You’d probably get, I’d probably get there all the time if I played like a pro, eight hours a day. You probably get there once a week, but nobody stays there.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But that’s probably the draw that keeps you coming back.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, dudes do drugs just so they can get there. They get hooked on pills because they find that maybe it’s amphetamines, maybe it’s opiates, whatever it is. Some guys will do drugs and find that spot and then go back to drugs just to get to that spot.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: From pool.

JOE ROGAN: From pool? Yeah. Oh, it’s a nutty game.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I mean, I’ve never ever dug into it like that.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, at the highest levels, guys are gambling for hundreds of thousands of dollars in these f*ing weird places in Kentucky. And weird pool, they streaming online on YouTube. They stream it on different websites. Oh, it’s at the highest level. It is a crazy game. It’s a crazy game.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I never knew that, but I learned a lot about that.

JOE ROGAN: I know a dude who’s one of the best in the world, and he can’t travel because he needs pills. So he can’t go overseas. He can’t go anywhere. He can’t travel without his pills. If he does, he won’t play.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Really?

JOE ROGAN: Oh, it’s nuts.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, it’s a head game.

JOE ROGAN: My friend, Jeremy Jones, he won the US Open. One of the greatest players of all time. He’s like, it is the most mental. And he plays everything. He played baseball at a high level. He plays golf. He’s like, it is the most mental. And really, it’s why nobody’s good at it. That’s why it never got to, it never got to a place where it was really appreciated professionally.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: Because you have to know how to play it to understand what you’re seeing. To really see people play well, you have to know what’s happening.

Finding Your Thing

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t, I’d never, I’m not good at any. I’ve not played sports, so I’m not good at them.

JOE ROGAN: No sports at all.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I didn’t really. I mean, I grew up kind of playing softball here and there.

JOE ROGAN: So is golf like the first.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Golf is my first. And my amount of shooting, which is technically labeled a sport, that’s a sport for sure. So that’s, it’s new to me. Sports are new because I just, I don’t know. I started this at 17 and didn’t and just was laser focused, like horse with blinders doing country music.

JOE ROGAN: And then what is it like going from just being a regular high school kid and all of a sudden 17, just being thrust into a spotlight.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I wasn’t in the spotlight at first. I was playing shitholes with no light.

JOE ROGAN: Even shitholes, there’s some kind of light you’re on.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know. I just, I don’t know. I feel like that I didn’t have a choice. It picked me. It’s the only thing I’ve ever been good at. Everything is hard. Everything else is hard to me. But music was the only thing that I was like, I guess that’s what I’m supposed to do because I’m actually good at it.

JOE ROGAN: So many people have a thing like that, and they say, oh, that’s just unrealistic. I can’t do that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I didn’t have a backup plan that helped. Barely graduated high school. I was like, I don’t want to waste my dad’s money.

JOE ROGAN: That does help going to college.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I was like, I have no backup plan. So it really does help. The hunger that it creates is like a fire that you can’t explain.

F* Your Backup Plan

JOE ROGAN: And it’s not good advice. I would never give the advice of don’t have a backup plan because some people are not going to make it. And then they’ll blame you. You told me I shouldn’t have a backup plan. But I really think that for someone who’s got some talent and a real desire to do that, and you can stay the course, you can deal with the hard times. You can’t have a backup plan. You cannot, because that backup plan will rob your time.

That’s the thing you have to think of. It robs your focus. It steals from your energy, so it’ll stop you from reaching your full potential. F* your backup plan.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I mean, it didn’t come from me.

JOE ROGAN: F* your backup plan.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And I don’t want to get blamed, but I just think that’s the reason that it happened is a lot of hard work, obviously, and determination, but just nothing else. I have nothing else. I was terrible at school, terrible at sports, had to get tutoring, had to stay late for the cheerleading dance. Everything was just hard for me.

JOE ROGAN: Right, but that’s just because you’re a great singer. That’s where your mind works. It’s just such a wonderful thing that you found the thing that you’re really good at. Because some people, some people don’t. They just don’t know why. Then they suck at school. They don’t know why they can’t pay attention. They don’t know why they can’t be at work on time. They don’t know why. They’re like, what’s wrong with me?

And if maybe that person just found that thing and they’re like, oh, my God, I’m supposed to be riding horses and shooting balloons.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Exactly. Here I am. I found me. Yeah, I think it’s, I feel like we’re the lucky ones when we get to, we know, this is what I’m supposed to do. This is what I’m going to chase, no matter what it costs. And you know, that doesn’t, I see so many people that are so immensely talented that just didn’t happen for. And you don’t know why.

The why you said you don’t know if it was one little factor of a period in their life or just not seen at the right time or chasing the right thing at the right time. And I don’t know, I feel very thankful for that. But I’m also trying to learn new things at 40, because I spent my whole adult life doing that, you know. Now I’m like, what can we do next? Let’s find another hobby.

Learning New Things at 40

JOE ROGAN: But that’s a great approach, though. Yeah, that’s great. I mean, it’s recognizing you want to have some more stuff in your life. It’s interesting.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I think that this come, I don’t know, does that come with wisdom?

JOE ROGAN: With age.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Age wisdom and also feeling accomplished. I mean, I feel like I set my goals, hit them.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You know, and that feels like, oh, okay, I can take a breath. Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: That’s got to be a part of it. Right? That’s got to be a part of it. It’s got to be a part that, you know, you can relax a little. Not that, you know, you will, you know, when it comes to writing and singing and stuff, but at least you don’t have to worry, am I going to make it? Made it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And what’s the point in the whole idea of making it is your life will be better and you’ll have. Well, your life would be better if you have more fun.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Find some stuff you like to do.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Exactly. You seem like somebody that chases a lot of new things and conquers them, which I really inspiring.

JOE ROGAN: Well, I chase things that you can never conquer. That’s the key.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And no one told me that till I started playing golf. And now it’s too late. You can’t ever win.

JOE ROGAN: For me, it started with martial arts. You never conquer that. There’s always going to be somebody better than you, especially if you’re not a professional.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But you get really, really good at the things that you’re pursuing.

The ADHD Superpower

JOE ROGAN: Well, it’s probably spend time. All the illness, I think something wrong with me for sure. If I was born at a different time. I was born in the 60s. They didn’t really diagnose kids with ADHD when I was a kid and dope them up.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: 100%. We 100% have it.

JOE ROGAN: 100%. I got it. Whatever that f*ing is. It’s a superpower. It’s a superpower if you use it, right?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I think so, too.

The Education System and Finding Your Path

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Just the idea that you have to medicate a kid because you can’t sit in school. Find out if that kid’s good at other stuff, right? Find out if there’s a thing that. Okay, maybe they can’t sit there where someone’s teaching them math. Maybe they get bored real quick. Maybe they start talking to their friends. Whatever it is, they probably have a thing they’re really good at, if they could find that thing.

I bet they focus when they’re playing video games, right? So what’s that all about? You know, find the thing that that kid can lock into. 100%. The thing is, you make people do things that are completely unnatural. You make people sit down when they’re six in a chair while some lady who’s making $35,000 a year doesn’t like kids is teach them some shit that she doesn’t care about.

So there’s no energy in the room, everything. And then when they’re out in the yard with their friends, they’re having fun and they’re laughing, and so they’re like, this is bullshit. This class sucks. And they’re talking to each other, and then they get in trouble for talking. Your child’s a problem. Is the child really the problem?

Seems like the child is a lot of energy. That’s not a problem. Yeah, you’re not providing an inspiring environment for a growing mind, just turning you into a dull drone. Some worker that just is capable of shutting themselves off all day and then showing up and then just doing some stuff that they don’t want to do because they were taught how to do it when they were kids.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I feel like there’s a lot more opportunities now than there was even when I was in school. It’s kind of just like Lindell ISD. Everybody learns the same. Everybody goes to the same class. You know what I mean? And my mom says I learned differently. She tries to say it that way.

JOE ROGAN: You learn differently.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But looking back, it’s the same. You just described my entire existence as a student.

The Impact of Teachers

JOE ROGAN: Well, it’s not just yours. It’s mine, and I think it’s most people’s. You know, the only class that I really enjoyed was, well, science. I always enjoyed science. And I enjoyed art. I always enjoyed that. But even my art, I had a shitty art teacher in high school. It’s like a failed artist who was really negative. And he kind of ruined art. Yeah. Not really, but ruined the idea of me doing it as a profession. I was like, God, I have to be around people like this. This guy’s gross. He was just so negative.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right. Bitter.

JOE ROGAN: Just sad. Just a sad old dude. I always remember he ate a basketball. His whole body was skinny, but his belly. Now I know that guy probably drank himself to sleep every night.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, he was.

JOE ROGAN: You sad as an artist.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Trapped in his own lot, too. They couldn’t.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, also, he wasn’t that good of an artist. That’s part of the problem. Part of the problem was he.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Needed a backup plan.

JOE ROGAN: Well, I just don’t think he had a lot of fire in him when it came to anything. And I think the art that he created was a representation of who he is as a human. And he saw these young kids that were talented. I was pretty talented. I was the third best kid. There’s a kid named Kevin that was a little better than me. And then a kid named John, who’s the best guy in our class.

And John told me a year or two ago, we were emailing each other back and forth, and John told me that that guy gave him an F. And I was like, okay. So it wasn’t just me. That guy’s a piece of shit. Because John was the best artist I’d ever seen when I was a teenager. And we were all, f*, this guy’s the art world, we’re out. So none of us became artists.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s sad.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, it was just this. That was what this guy wanted. What this guy wanted was to kill dreams.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I feel like it’s so. Especially in that, how old were.

JOE ROGAN: When I quit the classes, I stopped my senior year in high school. But by then I was also traveling and fighting. By then, I was. That was when I heavily got into martial arts. So by the time I was 17, my whole senior year, I was traveling around the country.

Starting Young in Music

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I started making money playing music.

JOE ROGAN: At 17, your senior year of high school?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Wow. So that must have alienated you from a lot of your friends.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. And I mean, I was also very big into church choir and stuff. And so I’m at the Honky Tonk till four in the morning because I was the house band. And then I’m dragging a leg into church, smelling terrible. No wonder y’all kick me out of youth groups, you assholes. I probably deserved it.

JOE ROGAN: That’s hilarious. What’d you do last night?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: My mom had to go with me for the first three months of my house gig because I couldn’t get in till I was 18 and I was playing in the house band. So she’d be like, oh, good, you can drive and I can drink beer and listen to y’all play.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, that’s hilarious.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s funny.

JOE ROGAN: But.

Ms. Caldwell: A Teacher Who Changed Everything

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, but it’s funny what you’re talking about. Teachers. I feel like there’s some that just really. There’s that turning point where you meet that one teacher or someone that in your childhood or high school years, that turns things around for you.

When you talk about your teacher, I had this teacher named Ms. Caldwell, and she taught speech. And I was a terrified literal. The shyest kid ever. My parents are both very vibrant and huge personalities. And I couldn’t get a word in edgewise. So I just didn’t talk until I was 16 because they just wouldn’t shut up. They’re just constantly. Dad’s telling little cops stories about her voice days. And my mom’s a PI, so she’s telling all her cool stories.

And so I just was really shy. And my little brother was same. He’s five years younger. And we just weren’t very vocal. And I somehow got forgot. I didn’t pay attention and didn’t put down my classes. You know, my junior year of high school and I had got shoved in a class where there was one spot and it was speech honors and it was a debate class. And that is not my vibe.

I was panicking. My mom came up to the school. I was sobbing. I was like, I can’t do this. I don’t even speak hardly. But I was singing here and there. I was singing in church. I could do it if I was singing, but still shyly singing. You know what I mean? In the background. And my mom was like, we got to figure this out. The school was like, well, there’s not really any room for her. Any other classes and whatever. And it was an honors class. This girl’s barely passing every class except choir.

JOE ROGAN: They just allowed you to enter into that class, they just somehow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And so then I think, looking back, Ms. Caldwell and the principal met with my mom, and she looked at Ms. Caldwell, and she was like, can she do this? And she was like, she needs to do this. And so I had to debate against these seniors and real smart kids. Right.

But it really brought me out of my shell. And so I’m thankful she wasn’t your art teacher. I’m thankful that Ms. Caldwell was like, no, I see potential in this girl. And if she’s going to. Because I sang at the talent show or whatever, she’s like, she’s going to be a singer. She’s going to have to learn to be in front of people and to show her personality and come out of her shell.

And it really changed my world, because then I started playing in bars, and I started to come into my personality a little bit, because you can’t do this if you don’t have. If you aren’t confident and have confidence in who you are, you know?

JOE ROGAN: Right. And the ability to be who you are in between songs.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That is a really important part.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Then that’s where people get to see you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. So I’m thankful for her. Thanks, Ms. Caldwell. Love you.

JOE ROGAN: Damn. Ms. Caldwell killed it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She killed it.

Public Speaking and Overcoming Fear

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. That’s beautiful to have a teacher like that and anyone can speak. The anxiety about, oh, I could never public speak. Yes, you could. You just. It’s not impossible. Can you talk to me? Okay, then you could talk to a bunch of people. You can do it. You might have to do it a bunch of times before you figure it out, but it’s not like breathing underwater. You could totally do it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s so scary to me. I mean, honestly, you’re so good at it. Also, comedians like that, to me, is the scariest of all. The show biz that you could pick is that.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s one of them.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s.

JOE ROGAN: That’s kind of what I like about it, though. I like scary stuff because you’ll have less people doing it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: So you’ll be like, I’m doing this.

JOE ROGAN: That’s why I got into fighting. That’s why I got into comedy. It’s like, let’s say, if you want to be a lawyer. How many people are trying to be a lawyer? Oh, my God. You got to go to law school. You got to get a degree. You got to pass the bar. You got to get hired by some sort of a law firm, and you got to try cases. What are you doing? A lot of people trying to be lawyers.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Because there’s a clear pathway. But if the pathway is foggy, how do you be a professional fighter? Oh, I’ll go that pathway. No one’s doing that. The people that are doing that are all crazy. Those are my kind of people. Or if the pathway is how to be a comedian. Oh, yeah, all these people are all misfits. This is perfect. These are my people. This is perfect. I’ll go do that. I’m insured of being around like minded, interesting people.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. That’s a great way to look at it. But I just think. I always think about how the first time you step on the stage and you’re, you know, you’re showing all your cards.

JOE ROGAN: Do you remember your first time?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, but for a comedian, to me, it’s like, songs. Songs are different. Yeah, you know, the first gig you play. Whatever. Everybody has their first time that they’re learning their ropes and how to get their feet under them. But that’s just so wrong. Here’s my jokes. Here’s my whole heart.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, here’s.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I hope. Do you think this is funny? Every time I see it, I’m like, that is the hardest thing in show business.

The Fear of Stand-Up Comedy

JOE ROGAN: The first time I ever did it, I was still fighting. And I’d done nothing but martial arts competition, literally eight hours a day for my whole life, for six years. And then I was more scared going on stage at an open mic night than I had ever been fighting, ever.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That makes sense to me.

JOE ROGAN: But I was confused. I was like, why am I scared? This doesn’t even make sense. It was so baffling to me. I was like, why am I so nervous?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That makes sense to me. It’s this. It’s something you. Well, you knew you were good at it, but you had to do it in front of people.

The First Time on Stage

JOE ROGAN: I didn’t even think I was good at it. My friends told me I was good at it, and they only told me I was good at it. It was like we would go to tournaments and everybody would be terrified. We’d all be really nervous. And I would be the humor. It was gallows humor.

So I would be the guy cracking jokes. I’d be the guy doing impressions of each other, like, of different friends. Like, what they’d be having sex or whatever it was and making everybody laugh, saying totally inappropriate stuff.

And my friend Steve, who I’m still friends with. He was a grown man, and I was like 15 at the time. And to this day, he’s still one of my best friends. But he told me he’s like, “You should be a comedian. Like, you’re funny.” And I was like, “You think I’m funny because you like me. I go, but other people think I’m an ahole. Like, my sense of humor is f*ed up.”

And he’s like, “You should just go to open mic night.” And I did. And I went to open mic night. I was like, oh, everybody sucks. Oh, this is fine. I was like, you go to see a few professionals and a few people that are just struggling. I thought everybody would be like Jerry Seinfeld or Richard Pryor. I’m going to get killed up there. This is going to be terrible.

And then I realized, oh, this is just like martial arts or anything else. You start off terrible, and then you try and then you get better, and then you figure it out. But I just wasn’t. I was just stunned by how scared I was more than anything.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Do you remember the first time you ever got on stage? Like, at a honky tonk or?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, it was a—

JOE ROGAN: How old were you?

Miranda’s First Performance

MIRANDA LAMBERT: 16. It was a True Value Country Showdown, the Rio Pall Mall in Longview, Texas.

JOE ROGAN: Wow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. And I was scared to death because I was like the shot kid, too. My dad’s a songwriter, too. You’re going to love this.

JOE ROGAN: My dad, cop and a songwriter.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: My dad is a songwriter. He plays guitar, and he had a band. His cop band on their side gig was all narcs, and they were called Contraband. They were a country band called Contraband. Can you even. That’s a great name. It’s the best.

JOE ROGAN: That’s a great one. That’s funny.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. But he wrote songs, so I was like, I’m going to enter this contest. My mom was shocked. I went. I was like, working in the yard. She’s like, “Go pick the weeds.” I’m like, “Mom, there’s an ad on the radio for a contest called the True Value Country Showdown, and I want to enter it.”

She was like, “What? You don’t even talk. You don’t. You’re too shy. Like, are you kidding me?” And I was like, “No, I want to do it.” And she was like, “What are you going to sing?” You had to sing an original song, and I sang one of my dad’s.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, wow. What was the song?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It was called, gosh, now I can’t think of it. Too many song titles in my head. Way, way too many.

JOE ROGAN: Like, Dunbar’s There, Here I Go Again.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s what the title is. And so, because I grew up on, like, forever, I thought my dad wrote like “Mama Tried,” because I grew up with him just playing John Pride and Haggard and David Allen Coe and Guy Clark, you know?

So I started to realize, oh, some of these are my dad’s originals, and some of those are Mel Haggard, so they’re not just dads. But I got up there and I got. I didn’t win, but it was like my first. Okay. Like you were just saying it was my first. Okay, maybe I can. I can do this.

Like, I’m green and I’m shy and I’m new and I’m young. But I’m not terrible. Like, I’m kind of equal with these guys. You know what I mean? We’re all babies. Yeah, it was. And it was. I don’t know. I think that’s the first time I was like, okay, I found something that doesn’t feel foreign to me. That’s not so hard to learn. You know what I mean?

Believing in Fate

JOE ROGAN: Do you believe in fate?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I do.

JOE ROGAN: You probably should. Yeah, right. Because it worked out.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, exactly.

JOE ROGAN: That’s my bias about fate. Like, if anybody should believe in fate, it’s people like you or I. But I’m not sure. My bias is that I believe in it because it worked out.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: You know, but I mean, if your life is st and you’re like, is this fate? Like, what did I do in a past life? Like, what kind of an ahole was I? Everything just turned out so terrible, you know?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, there’s. I mean, I don’t know. I feel like I also met my husband in a crazy way, and so I can’t help but believe in fate.

JOE ROGAN: There’s something to it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I believe in it.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. There’s something to it. As much as I. My mind want. My rational mind wants to ignore the possibility, like the randomness of the universe, the size and scope of it all. Do you really think it matters what you do? Do you really think. But it does to you, right?

It has a giant impact on your life, and everything matters. Just because there’s black holes doesn’t mean your f*ing homework doesn’t matter, you know? Everything matters, right? Your whole world. Everything matters. It’s like, you can’t think that things don’t matter, like, that the universe wouldn’t have a plan for your life. It seems to have a plan for everything.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, all of it seems to be happening for some sort of a very bizarre reason. All of it together. So I’m sure that there’s something to fate, but it’s just. My rational mind wants to go. That’s just your ego. It’s silly. You could have been born in Somalia. Life could have sucked for you. You know, it’s hard to. Because fate’s a weird one. Like, you can’t measure it, can’t put it on a scale, but it seems to be real.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, well, it’s real for us, so then it’s real.

JOE ROGAN: I guess.

West Texas Stars

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Also, I’m like, your ceiling is giving me. I love it. The little shooting star.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And you were like, “Fate is real.” And it was like, boom. And I was like, yeah, it is.

JOE ROGAN: If I don’t tell people, I didn’t tell you. But sometimes people.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I love it.

JOE ROGAN: They’re like, am I having flashbacks? Like, what’s going on?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s awesome. That’s what I love about West Texas. Something about, it’s just so vast in the middle of nowhere. The stars are. They feel like they’re. We call it the Thunderdome. When we lay in the yard, and it just feels like they’re. You could reach up and grab them because it’s so dark out there.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Magical.

JOE ROGAN: Well, they’re on top of you, and you don’t have any light pollution.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. That’s the thing that ruins the world.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: That’s the problem with New York City. That’s why everybody’s so stupid. They’re so stuck in their own world. It’s because they don’t realize they’re in space. You know, you don’t get that break. Yeah, there’s a break that you get from space that I don’t think you get from anything else, where you just look up and go, oh, yeah, okay. I’m taking all this st way too seriously.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: This is nuts. Like, just above us.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It totally is. And also when you said that made me think of what we were talking about earlier, about wisdom and, I don’t know, just kind of reaching some goals and taking a breath and calming down and going, okay, everything’s okay. I just feel like I saw she started and lost my train of thought. I have ADHD.

JOE ROGAN: I lost my mind. Maybe I have to shut them off. Well, we were talking about space.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What happened?

JOE ROGAN: Squirrel?

Nicotine Pouches

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What are you zening over there? What are those?

JOE ROGAN: Oh, these are Lucy’s. They’re breakers. Do you ever take these?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know what they are, but I like zins.

JOE ROGAN: You like? Here, try these. These are strong though.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re. Oh, like what, sixes?

JOE ROGAN: Nine.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, I’ll pass out.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, don’t do it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m not doing it. I’m not doing it.

JOE ROGAN: This is strong. This one’s not. Yeah, these are nines. Oh, you got some fours. Yeah. Oh, chuck me a four, son.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What are, what’s the Lucy’s. Why are they different?

JOE ROGAN: They have a little thing inside of them that you. They’re called breakers. So it’s like coffee flavored, you put—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: In your mouth just like it in.

JOE ROGAN: Uh huh. Yeah. And you crack that little sucker open, it gives you a little—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Sugar, almost like a little cupcake in there for you.

JOE ROGAN: Those are fours, right? So it’s not bad. That’s nice.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: If I get up and run out of here, I already couldn’t concentrate because of the shooting guitar.

JOE ROGAN: I saw a dude online, he got a 50 milligram one from overseas.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What? Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And he tried it and you know he was violently ill lying on the ground. Like I had terrible.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Why would you do that?

JOE ROGAN: Well, I think he did it for props, you know, like so he could get some online cred just for the views. Did it for the great.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Did it work?

JOE ROGAN: I mean, I guess I watched it. I wanted to see. I’m like, you going to take a 50? Oh, you’re fed, dude. And he said, “Oh my God, it’s like drinking battery acid.” And then he was lying on the ground at the end of it. It was like, “I really fed up. I made a giant mistake.” Because it’s so much nicotine, 50 grams.

The Benefits of Nicotine

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s crazy, but you’re so into health and take such good care of yourself and I. What is the big. What? Like why? I just tell people, oh, they’re good for you. Have one. What do you think? Like, tell me your opinion of these. There’s a whole craze.

JOE ROGAN: Nicotine is not bad for you, right? The delivery method is what’s bad for you. And the delivery method with cigarettes in particular, with cigarettes that have a bunch of chemicals added to them that’s even worse.

Like the regular cigarettes, like natural cigarettes, I bet are probably not as bad for you. Dr. Suzanne Humphries, she’s a physician who was on here, was explaining to us why regular cigarettes are not as bad, but it’s still not good for you. You’re smoking in your lungs, but nicotine itself is not bad.

Nicotine itself is neuroprotectant. Nicotine itself actually is a nootropic, so which means it’s cognitively enhancing. So nootropics are like vitamins that help brain function. And there’s a bunch of them. Have some. Here we have some stuff called Alpha Brain. That’s great.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’ve seen that.

JOE ROGAN: There’s a bunch of companies that make different versions of nootropic, but there are nutrients that enhance memory and enhance your verbal memory. So your ability to recall words, they can enhance peak alpha flow state.

They’ve done real. They’ve done two double blind placebo controlled studies at the Boston center for Memory with Alpha Brain. It shows more effectiveness than any of the drugs that they had studied over the past nine months before they did this. This is pretty impressive.

So nicotine does that too. Nicotine enhances your memory, enhances brain function, enhances. It stimulates you. So there’s a lot of benefits to nicotine as a. But the problem is, how do you take it? How are you taking your nicotine? You know, probably one of the best ways, maybe gum, you know, and these things.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: People are wearing patches now and stuff.

Nicotine Addiction and Productivity

JOE ROGAN: Fing crazy people. That’s Ron White. He wears a goddamn patch. What are you doing, Ron? I got a patch on and I’m smoking. He’s got a cigar. He’s got a Zen fing animal, but he’s such an animal. But I think there’s real benefit. I know a guy who puts a nicotine patch on for productivity when he writes.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That makes sense to me. I feel like, because all the songwriters are, right now, everybody in Nashville’s spinning, and I’m like, I’ll try one. And it really does give you a little stimulant. And also have a lot of words in my head. I need to remember words, and I also need to write new words. So anything to help with that.

JOE ROGAN: Anything you want. If you want help with memory, Alpha Brain is a really good one.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I want to try that. I just think at some point too, when you’re tired, it just feels like you can’t. I mean, you just saw me lose my train of thought, so I don’t want to be on a bunch of Adderall and stuff. I want to find a different method to have my brain functioning at the best it can.

JOE ROGAN: These are addictive, though. And I got to say, different people have different levels of how addicted they get with these. Some people can’t not have them. I went on vacation. I said, I’m going to go on vacation and not bring it and see what happens. See if I freak out just to see. And nothing. Zero, Nothing. It was like, I kind of missed them maybe for a day or two. Wanted one, didn’t have any. And then after three days, I was like, oh, this is fine. It’s not like a physical, oh, my God, I’m Jones.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s not like smoking.

JOE ROGAN: I’m shaken. Yeah, yeah. But I know people that have tried to get off of them that really struggle.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I mean, it is addictive. I mean, it’s nicotine.

JOE ROGAN: I think the vapes are the hardest.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: To get off of the vapes. That’s. I don’t want heat on my voice either.

JOE ROGAN: Right. Well, vapes aren’t really hot, but it is if you buy them. Ones that are in the gas station, who knows where those are?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: With the ones that heat up.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, yeah, the crazy ones. Adam Curry. Do you know Adam Curry? He’s the first podcaster. He used to be MTV DJ.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes.

JOE ROGAN: Guy with beautiful hair.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes.

JOE ROGAN: Good friend of mine, he carries around one of those robot lunchbox vapes, those big old crazy ones while you’re blowing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And it makes noise.

JOE ROGAN: It’s kind of like a power bar on the side of it. It’s so ridiculous. And he blows his giant. But it’s all like, he fills it with natural oil. So it’s air quotes. Healthy air quotes. Yeah, yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s what people say when they smoke American spirits.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. It’s healthy. Come on. There’s an Indian on there.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, exactly.

American Spirit Cigarettes and Tobacco Companies

JOE ROGAN: How come they get away with that? Are American spirits owned by Native Americans? No. So how the f* do they have a Native American on there? Not catch any slack? They do, right? Don’t. They haven’t.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s a badass package.

JOE ROGAN: They got in trouble in the past for stuff. Did they? I’m not getting into it. Oh, I’m getting tobacco company problems.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He’s like. And pivot.

JOE ROGAN: Did you ever see that movie the Insider with Russell Crowe?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t think so.

JOE ROGAN: It’s about a guy who works for a tobacco company that is explaining. He was a chemist, and he was explaining how they added all these different things to make it more addictive. And they’re trying to kill him in the film because they don’t want that information getting out. He’s the insider. It’s kind of crazy movie and based on a true story.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Wow.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. They put a bunch of shit in cigarettes to try to get you hooked.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, then they do it. I mean, it works, people.

JOE ROGAN: It’s the hardest one.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I feel like it’s the most. You hear people talking about trying to quit that and drinking to me. Just on the daily. I’m in a band. So I was like, oh, I quit. Now they’re all like, you got a Zen? You got a Zen? Because it’s just highly addictive. I guess it’s.

JOE ROGAN: It is, but it’s. People want something. They just want something to take them out of whatever state they’re in. Give me something. Give me a drink. Give me this. Give me a coffee. Everybody I know that’s an alcoholic. Synonymous. They all smoke or drink tons of coffee. It’s either or both.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes.

JOE ROGAN: Because they just want to do something. Get me something’s not going to make me suck dick for bus fare, but I’m at least get a little bit of something different than regular life. I don’t want to be homeless. I don’t want to be cracked out. But, yeah, give me something.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, just give me a little something.

JOE ROGAN: Take me away from wherever I am right now.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, not that far away. Just a little bit away.

JOE ROGAN: It’s a little next door. Let me go next door and hide.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m going to start saying that when I’m like, Kevin’s in. Can I go? I need to go next door.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, I’m going to go next door just a little bit. I don’t want to go too far away. I can hear everybody, but.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Are you supposed to break this little candy thing?

JOE ROGAN: I do. Yeah. I break it right away. It just crack down on that little sucker.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What’s in there?

JOE ROGAN: I don’t know. Probably candy. Ooh, nice, right?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s a little burst of flavor.

JOE ROGAN: Burst of flavor. I like those. I like those. My buddy Duncan found out that his blood sugar goes up when he vapes because he was buying those gas station vapes. And he got terrible. He got type 2 diabetes because he was eating too much sugar. He’s okay. Don’t worry. But he realized because he monitors his blood glucose that when he was vaping, his blood was going through the roof. I go, okay, why do you think that is? Why do you think it’s strawberry flavored? What the f* do you think’s in there, bro? You’re eating candy all day. You’re vaping on sugar.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Sugar oils. Yeah, yeah.

JOE ROGAN: It has to be.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: It has to be. I mean, if it’s grape flavored or whatever the hell it is, it’s like there’s some. Also, who knows what kind of oil they’re putting in those damn things? It’s probably made in China or somewhere. I watched a video on TikTok of these dudes testing them. So some dude is just sucking on each one of them to make sure they work at the factory.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What’s going to happen to him?

JOE ROGAN: I don’t know what’s going to happen to you because you’re sucking on the same one that he was sucking on. Nobody cleans those things off. You just get him at the gas station and stick it right in your mouth.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s like a karaoke mic. Yeah, that’s nasty.

JOE ROGAN: So nasty.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Okay, I’m spitting this out. Hold the pause. Pause.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, you get rid of it. It’s like a buzz.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, like a little buzz.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, a little.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Next.

JOE ROGAN: You went next door.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I like that. Excuse me, I’m going next door.

The Dangers of Vaping

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. So anyway, nicotine vapes. I don’t think they’re good for you folks. Sorry. Because people thought they were healthier for you than cigarettes, but it turns out, no, not only they’re here. Here’s this look. He’s testing all of them. All cute little pink ones. He’s got to make sure they all work. By the way, how hooked is that guy? That guy must awful f*ing hooked. Where is this taking place? Does it say in the. That guy has to test all of them. I would like to see what that guy’s. Look, that cat looks like he’s 15 years old. No. 7 to 8,000 tests per day.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s terrible, bro.

JOE ROGAN: Test his lungs, because there’s a thing called popcorn lung that kids are getting.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I’ve heard of that.

JOE ROGAN: The thing about these things is that they’re very, very addictive. They’re more addictive than, I think, any other delivery method. And the thing about nicotine vapes is the first vape of the day is the only one you really want. The first vape of the day. I would take a vape and be like, this is wonderful. This feeling is wonderful. It’s wonderful. And then you chase that dragon and you never get it back until the next day. The rest of the day, you’re sucking on this thing. Go.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Nope, Nothing. I’m not getting it. I’m not getting that wonderful feeling. Yeah, you have to have no nicotine in your system. And then you have that one hit. It’s like, welcome me into your life.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Do you get that feeling from those patches?

JOE ROGAN: I don’t think so. I think the patch just make you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Like a little Adderall.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s like, I’m sure people have Adderall patches, don’t they? Do they have an Adderall patch? No, Adderall is a sketchy one. I had some in here the other day, was telling me they were doing Adderall. Right before I went, I did an Adderall just so I’m ready.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s a writing. It’s very helpful for writing.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, I’m sure.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s like you don’t want to have. I don’t want to need it. So that’s why I was like, what brain things can I take? What are Lucy’s.

JOE ROGAN: What does it say, Jamie? Oh, amphetamine patch. There it is.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, sure are.

Adderall and ADHD Medication

JOE ROGAN: ADHD treatment that lets you control your time your way. They always say that. Look, there’s a woman who’s in control. Look at her with her jean jacket on, her arms crossed. I’m in control. She’s got a controlled posture. Look at her posture. I’m on a meth patch. I’m in control.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: A meth patch, Please, Lord, no.

JOE ROGAN: You are literally on a drug that will kill your superpower. You got a superpower and you’re killing it with a drug. So you could focus on that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I definitely don’t want a patch of that.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, no, thanks. I don’t need it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Maybe.

JOE ROGAN: Maybe somebody needs it. I don’t want to judge, but the reality is that stuff, the amphetamines in any shape or form are highly addictive, and they’re passing them out like candy. My daughter’s in high school, and a bunch of kids in high school have air quotes. ADHD. And because of ADHD, they get Adderall. And then also they get more time on tests because they got ADHD. They can’t focus, so they’re f*ing on speed.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Tricks of the train.

JOE ROGAN: Because it’s very competitive. Parents want to get their kids into colleges. They’re getting their kids diagnosed so they can get their kid hooked on whatever they’re probably already hooked on, too, because a lot of people that are adults are hooked on it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And you can tell those folks because they come to the parent teacher meetings and they can’t shut the f* up. And they just want to talk to you about everything. Oh, my God. They want to corner me and ask me about some episode I did. Oh, my God, I love that episode that you did with the guy about climate. They’re so cracked out. They’re so obviously cracked out. And there’s a lot of people out there just running around, cracked out, but they feel like they got it from the doctor. The doctor gave me this. I’ll tell you, 30 milligrams. And I’m just a better person. I’m just better about all tasks.

Adderall Prescriptions and Focus

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m actually, I talk to that person daily. I feel like those people are everywhere.

JOE ROGAN: They’re everywhere. Well, we looked it up. Use Perplexity, which is one of our sponsors, and find out how many prescriptions for Adderall they wrote in, let’s say 2024. Let’s take a guess.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: How many do you think? I mean, I could not even ballpark that.

JOE ROGAN: I want to say 40 million. I bet it’s 40 million prescriptions at least. It’s probably a lot more, but I’m going conservative, and I’m saying 40 million prescriptions for Adderall in 2024. What do you want? You want a guess? Yeah, take a guess.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: 41.

JOE ROGAN: 51. You’re probably closer. I bet it’s like 90. I bet it’s 90.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I hope it’s not.

JOE ROGAN: I bet it is, because it’s individual people refilling prescriptions. I don’t think it’s 90 million patients, but it’s a lot. I bet it’s all journalists. I bet most people that are writing things. Yeah, I bet that. What is it? Okay, how many Adderall prescriptions were written in 2024, according to Plexi? 45 million Adderall prescriptions written in the United States. Well, we were both in the middle.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Would you go 51? Yeah, I said 40. Commonly prescribed stimulants for conditions such as ADHD and narcolepsy. This number follows several years of notable growth. Huh.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Weird.

JOE ROGAN: No more people need it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s up 2019. Look at that.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Notable growth data suggests the prescription rates began to decline slightly after a sharp surge during the COVID-19 pandemic and shortages affected. I’ll stop 2019. It was only 35 million. Interesting. So it’s up 10 million.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Whew.

JOE ROGAN: That’s crazy. 41.4 million in 2021 and 45 million by 2023. I bet there’s a lot of people getting it illegally, too. What’s that number? Okay, let’s, that’s because there was that shortage. They’ve recovered from it. Well, also, once the shortage started, people got dealers, but people are using mushrooms and stuff for that now, too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: People got dealers, but people are using mushrooms and stuff for that now, too.

JOE ROGAN: That’s a very different thing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’ve heard a lot about that.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Microdosing mushrooms, that’s a very different thing than Adderall. That’s the opposite of Adderall.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Even if it’s for focus. Right?

Mushrooms and Dosage Concerns

JOE ROGAN: Well, I’m sure it’ll help your focus on something. Yeah. But you got to mind your p’s and q’s when it comes to your dosages. Also, where you get it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s so scary for me. I’m like, where is it from? Did you just go to the cow pasture? Because that’s what teenagers did. When I heard they were doing mushrooms, they’re cow tipping and going. I’m from East Texas.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Well, they definitely found them growing on poop. I mean, that’s how all humans originally probably discovered psilocybin, and they found them on cow poop. But the thing about that, though, is you got to get them from somebody who knows what they’re doing. They’re all different. And you can get some that are crazy strong. There’s some out there that’ll knock you into another universe.

So what do you do? Are you just eating a cap? Are you paying attention to the, are you getting them in pill form? Who are you getting them from? I have a friend who, are all my questions too, gets them from a friend. And I was like, it’s a good guy.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Who?

JOE ROGAN: Who’s the guy? Are you not seeing these things get packaged? Get the f* out of here.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Little shady.

JOE ROGAN: Super sketch. Super sketch. And they all, it’s like marijuana edibles. Before the legality in California, when it was medical, they had been, it was crazy, because now they, because of the regulations in California, I think the most they can make them is 10 milligrams, which is normal. It’s a normal dose.

But before that, when it was medical, it became medical in the 90s, they would make 500 milligram Chiba chews, these things that, they’re 500 milligrams, which is insane. It puts you in another dimension.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I never even heard of that.

JOE ROGAN: They’re so strong. And my friend Joey, who’s a real demon Joey, used to take the wrapper off of 25 milligram ones and give people a 500 milligram one instead.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, a real demon.

JOE ROGAN: And he would just laugh because he could tolerate insane doses. So he would give people preposterous amounts.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have a songwriter friend, and I love her dearly, but whatever she says, do this, I’m like, do a quarter of that. Whatever that is to the public. Do yourself a service. Do a quarter of that.

JOE ROGAN: Some people have ridiculous tolerances for marijuana.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I mean, it’s crazy.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. For anything.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m just over here taking a Lucy from a random dude.

JOE ROGAN: It wasn’t that bad, right? I would never, the nine. I would have told you, spend.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s a lot.

JOE ROGAN: Quick. It’s a lot. I have 12s.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What do you use those for? Real busy days.

JOE ROGAN: I don’t like them. They jolt me too much. But I have them. This is just because Lucy sent them to me, but I think the right dose is three or four. That’s right. Just a little pick me up, just a little.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Not the cracked out. Not cracked out?

The Adderall Experience

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Not the cracked out. Not at all. I’ve never tried Adderall. I’m scared of it. I want to try it one day because I’m scared of it. Because I’m like, I need to know what everybody’s fussing about. Because everybody I know that’s tried it’s like, don’t try it. You’ll love it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You’ll love it.

JOE ROGAN: You’ll f*ing love it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is focus. I mean, it is. It really hones in.

JOE ROGAN: I have a buddy of mine, and his wife told him to stop because he was snorting it because he was writing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s insane.

JOE ROGAN: He’s like, that’s the best way to get it real quick. And he was like, to his wife, he’s like, why do you care how I do it? She’s like, you’re snorting drugs while the kids are asleep.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He’s like, okay, yeah, go far, dude.

JOE ROGAN: Slow your roll. He’s not an addict, though. He just felt like.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He’s not an addict, though. He’s not an addict.

JOE ROGAN: He felt like he had to snort to really get the most out of it quickly.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Everybody, like you said, everybody’s trying to find something.

JOE ROGAN: Because I think if you take it as a pill, it probably takes an hour before it kicks in. And he didn’t have an hour. So he’s like.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have a deadline. Yeah. Does your friend that disappears, does he have, he doesn’t have phone. No. Digital, no.

JOE ROGAN: Nothing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I wonder if that digital detox is one of the hardest ones.

JOE ROGAN: I feel like it’s got to be the hardest.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

Digital Detox and Social Media

JOE ROGAN: I’ve done social media detoxes for multiple days. And you genuinely feel better. And then you go, why am I doing this to myself? Or I don’t do this. I know all the time.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Something that’s annoying, if I can just say it is that when people do take a break from social media, that’s all they tell you about the whole time. Well, I’m on a break from social media. I’m like, can you be on a break without telling anybody that you’re on a break from social media?

JOE ROGAN: Right. They have to tell you how virtuous they are. I am actually going to break social media, unlike you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m like, cool, bro.

JOE ROGAN: You little addict. Scrolling through cat videos.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Doom scrolling.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, there’s a lot of doom scrolling. Yeah. It’s like people who do yoga, they can’t shut the f* up about it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Or people with a special diet.

JOE ROGAN: Like, oh, yeah, you’re hearing about it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You’re hearing about it.

JOE ROGAN: Vegans are the worst.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You’re going to hear about it.

JOE ROGAN: They’re the absolute worst. No one has ever met a vegan that didn’t tell them they’re vegan. It doesn’t happen. They always tell you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Never, not one.

JOE ROGAN: They work it into a conversation. Eventually they’ll let you know how virtuous they are.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You can not eat meat and not tell anyone.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, just do it as a spiritual growth.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Just like it’s your little secret with yourself.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Your little secret with yourself is you’re not on social media.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: So don’t tell me.

JOE ROGAN: My favorite is people who are on social media making fun of people that are on social media. Because there’s a lot of really not self aware people. They’re mocking people that spend all their time on social media while they’re making videos on social media. That’s rich.

TikTok and Finding Talent

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It overwhelms me. Honestly, I’m trying to, you can’t keep up with it, so I just try, I don’t try to keep up with it. I was just talking to my heroes. Maybe I need to get on TikTok. There’s a lot of music on TikTok. There’s a lot of musicians and, yeah, we have a label now called Big Loud Texas. Our office is in Austin.

And I’m like, I know there’s amazing talent on there. And one of our flagship artists, Dylan Gossett, posted something awesome on there and now he’s out there crushing it. So I feel like I’m missing out. But then I’m like, do I need one more thing? I don’t know. It’s this battle.

JOE ROGAN: Do you have an assistant?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. And I have a great management team, too.

JOE ROGAN: This is great. Get your assistant on TikTok and then tell them to let you know if anything’s cool and show it to you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She did that. And we signed a guy. His name’s Alex Ford.

JOE ROGAN: You got it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s what happened.

JOE ROGAN: So perfect. That way you don’t have to be on it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: So you could avoid it. And she’ll be a net that catches all the good fish.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Cameron, it’s all you, girl.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s all you, girl. So she’ll catch the good fish. You don’t have to go by the river. Yeah, just stay off that TikTok River.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I needed that talk today. Because we just had that talk on the plane on the way here today.

JOE ROGAN: Because it’s a raging river.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m scared.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, you should be scared.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m already like, ooh. Everything’s just a lot of information all the time.

JOE ROGAN: I know. For me, it’s like a show of force when I leave my phone on the nightstand. When I go to the bathroom. It’s like, I’m going to take a shit without my phone.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Do you tell everybody?

JOE ROGAN: Nope.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: See?

JOE ROGAN: Just told you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: See? Good. See, you’re not one of those. I’m on a social media break.

JOE ROGAN: No. My wife has an app on her phone that shows how long she’s been without social media. If you want to go on social media, you have to go into the app, enter a password, and open everything up.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I think that’s so smart.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, yeah. And she showed me the other day. It was 90 hours. I was like, that must feel so good. She’s like, you feel different. You feel different. It’s not good for you. Bad for everybody.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No, but we need it. But for some things, I get it.

JOE ROGAN: It’s great for artists. It’s great to promote your work. It’s great for comedians to put clips up. It’s great for musicians to put songs out there. It’s great. It is great in a lot of ways. I’m so happy it exists.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, me too. I was stapling my posters to a phone pole when I started. I did it. Old boots on the ground, walking up to the radio station, knocking on the door, saying, can I play a song? And now? Yes. Have you ever seen Loretta Lynn’s life story? Have you ever seen Coal Miner’s Daughter? Yes, that.

Me and my mom with bologna sandwich in my mom’s sport expedition, driving around all over Texas. Me going, I’m a singer songwriter, and now I’m jealous of the way that people can do it now.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, but I think you probably develop so much character doing it the way you did it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I’m thankful for that. But I’m also like, well, damn, these kids, they just post something like 100 million people see it in the night. What’s happening?

The Challenge of Instant Fame

JOE ROGAN: Well, the problem with that is sometimes people get fame they’re not really ready for yet. And I think doing what you did and going to bars and then eventually becoming famous after years and years of performing and promoting yourself and getting your chops on stage and really settling into yourself, that is so much better than being a 20 year old kid who sits around and comes up with a song.

Look at Oliver Anthony. Oliver Anthony is a good friend of mine. He was selling f*ing farm equipment. He makes that Rich Man North of Richmond song and all of a sudden he’s a giant superstar. And that’s jolting. I had a phone call with him while it was going down.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Was he just like, help? I mean, that’s crazy.

JOE ROGAN: He’s like, people are offering me money. I go, don’t take any money from anybody. Do not sign with anybody. I go, you don’t need anybody. You already did it, right? You’ve got talent and you’re already famous. You just made a giant hit song. Don’t give away any of you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes.

JOE ROGAN: Don’t sell it. He’s like, well, they’re telling me I got to strike while the iron’s hot. I’m like, f* those people. They don’t know what they’re talking about. You could do this again. You can do this again and again and again. Now that you already did it, it’s going to be way easier the second time because everybody’s going to be waiting to see what you say next.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I know. And that’s also nobody. You can’t learn. It’s like you do the journey in reverse.

JOE ROGAN: Well, he did. The first show he ever did was a giant sold out. The first time he ever performed live, giant sold out show when he was already famous.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s so mind boggling. I can’t even put it into words because I’m thinking how you get your chops and how you did it fight by fight, you did it stage by stage. When during comedy, it just happened so fast. And it’s like, and then you still have to pay the dues, but it’s just backwards.

JOE ROGAN: The thing is though, he paid the dues as a regular blue collar human being.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He did for sure.

JOE ROGAN: And that’s where he developed his character. So that when it all came, he’s like, oh my God, I just stepped into a magic story.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: He had a regular story. And then all of a sudden the genie came along and abracadabra. The Internet. And the Internet just put that song out there. And there was like, holy s*, this song’s great. And all of a sudden he’s hugely famous. But he had character for someone that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Being a real person, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. It scares me. I’m just like, we still got to go do the work now. So I got to start developing who you are now, even though the world already knows who they think you are.

Growing Up Famous

JOE ROGAN: You know, it’s almost impossible if you start too young. We were talking about that with Michael Jackson the other day. No one can teach you how to do that. And no one survives that. Everybody who’s famous when they’re a little kid, they’re all f*ed up. No one gets it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It comes with really high cost. You can see it.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. I always make the analogy that’s like you’re making cement, but you don’t put the right ingredients in and you can’t go back and remix it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: If you don’t put enough water in or you don’t put enough sand in, that cement sucks. It’s always going to be f*ed up. And that’s what it’s like when you’re a kid and you get famous. You didn’t allow that person to mix correctly.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right. I think that’s why I’m glad I didn’t go to college, but I got to have the learning times of just being 17, 18, 19, 20, just learning life while playing music. But it was just kind of in some dive bar somewhere. It wasn’t in front of people. You know what I mean?

And you get to build your character. You get to figure out who you are. And that’s why I think the down by the river and the TikTok River. I learned two things. I’m going to refer to it as down by the river. And I need to go next, do the TikTok River.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s a raging river too. That’s a scary a river. That river never stops. It never stops.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Which we’re thankful for it too, by the way. I found some great talent and learned some really cool recipes and get to talk about rescue dogs. There’s the good things about it.

Navigating Social Media as a New Generation

JOE ROGAN: There’s great things. It’s basically a new element of human civilization that we have to contend with that we’ve never figured out how to. There’s no real precedent on how to navigate this, especially as a child. No children ever grew up with it before. These are the first children that are growing up with it, and no one can tell them how to do it.

We can just observe what’s going wrong with it. Yeah, it’s real sketchy. Yeah, it’s real weird. And people say to me, do you let your kids on social media? I’m like, yes, because they have to be able to handle it and they have to know what it is. But don’t. But also don’t do it. One of my daughters, my youngest, also has that same app on her phone. She never goes on social media anymore.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: How old is she?

JOE ROGAN: She’s 15. So she stays off of it. And she’ll watch YouTube. She’ll watch YouTube videos and stuff like that. But social media, she’s like, it just doesn’t. I don’t like it. It’s not good for you. And it gets in the way of school work and it gets in the way of stuff she’s doing. So she stays off it. But she’s just wise. If I was 15, I’d be so dumb.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, no, I don’t believe that for a second.

JOE ROGAN: TikToking all day. I’d have been making all kinds of stupid videos. Try to get attention. That’s also part of the problem is that kids are doing things just to try to get attention rather than doing things because they really love an art form they’re trying to get better at.

If you make a great song and you’re 17 years old and it goes viral, at least you’re doing a thing. You’re doing an art thing. You’re not just trying to get attention. And there’s a lot of people out there that don’t have a thing. They’re just trying to get attention. If you ask young kids, what do you want to do when you grow older, when you grow up, a lot of them, a giant percentage of them, just want to be famous.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I was about to say that I saw that whatever that study was, and I read about it and it was like, but famous for what? You just want to be famous. But what skill or what trade or what? What are you just famous?

JOE ROGAN: Why Kim Kardashian?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Why in the world. That sounds awful.

Famous for Being Famous

JOE ROGAN: Well, because they see cameras going off and people are staring at you, and that’s a person. That’s an important person. A lot of people just want to be an important person. They want to be a person with the nice stuff. Look at the nice house and look at the nice cars and look at the nice watch and the nice this. And they just want to be an important person.

And the society that they are growing up in shows them that all you have to do is be famous. Kim Kardashian is one of the most famous people alive. She doesn’t do anything. It’s not like a thing. We could point to, oh, she’s the best. She’s the best painter. She’s the best singer. Nope. Nothing. Zero. Zero things. Super famous worth a billion dollars.

And then kids are like, that’s what I want to do. Especially if they’re dumb. And unfortunately, a lot of people are dumb. And those people never thought they would ever be famous before. But now you can be dumb and famous.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I mean, that’s a statement.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, dumb. You can be dumb and famous and not be good at anything. Maybe you could be dumb, but you’re the greatest baseball player of all time. That’s great. And you’re famous. But no, you’re dumb and you’re famous and you don’t do anything. You’re not good at a thing. Your thing is just.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: There’s no fulfillment in that.

JOE ROGAN: That.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: There can’t be.

JOE ROGAN: There’s not.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Even if you’re not great at the thing or a thing, or if you try a bunch of stuff and you kind of suck at all of it, but you are working on it or whatever. There’s fulfillment in that. There’s an accomplishment. I paint folk chickens, and I’m terrible at it.

JOE ROGAN: You what?

Folk Art Chickens

MIRANDA LAMBERT: A little. Just folk art. Chickens. I don’t even know why. I have no idea why. And they’re not good. You make paintings of chickens, paint them on little canvases.

JOE ROGAN: What’s a folk chicken?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I just call it folk art because it’s bad. And when I look up folk art, I’m like, oh, I can do that. Some folk art’s amazing, but I look up folk art for beginners, and I get inspired. I’ll be like, oh, I could do that.

JOE ROGAN: I’ve never heard that genre before.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Look it up. It’s kind of, it’s anything and everything.

JOE ROGAN: Jamie, will you please look up folk art? What is the definition of folk art?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That kind of stuff.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, like, just reflect the cultural life of community associated with fields of folklore and cultural heritage. Huh. It’s a 19th century concept.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know anything about it. I just am drawn to it. Cause I think it’s cute and fun.

JOE ROGAN: Do you have any of your stuff online?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No, it’s in my backpack. I’m not going to show anybody. This is like, I painted one for my mom. She has to hang it up still. Mom. She put it in her kitchen.

JOE ROGAN: I didn’t know that that was a. Show me some more of those images. I didn’t know that that was a genre. I had no idea.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But I’m terrible at it, and I don’t know anything about it. And I would like to learn. I want to take some YouTube classes or whatever.

JOE ROGAN: So it’s like, keep it on there. So it’s not realistic. Folk art chicken. Okay. There’s a folk art chicken. Let’s see.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Look, they’re so cute. Look how cute they are. Okay, like that one? Like that little chunky one in the middle. The black.

JOE ROGAN: How about the whimsical red hen above your.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, that’s like. I’m only as good as, go back. That one? Yeah, that’s about.

JOE ROGAN: See that one that says whimsical red hen right there above your cursor.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, she’s cute.

JOE ROGAN: Above your cursor.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, click on that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I could.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, but that one.

Exploring New Creative Outlets

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And I’ll go to YouTubes of teaching me all that to say, I’m trying something.

JOE ROGAN: I think it’s great you’re doing different things. Boy, some of these chickens are terrible. How about that one?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Hey, it’s art. You cannot speak ill of that chicken.

JOE ROGAN: Like that. Oh, like that chicken. That’s a drone.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s what I look like for real.

JOE ROGAN: That’s a drone.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re so bad.

JOE ROGAN: Put in my yard by China.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: My husband is probably dying out there that I even brought this up. He’s like, “Are you talking about your stupid soul car chicken?” So I’ll just be in there. He’s like, cooking, and I’m just like, I’m painting my chickens right now.

JOE ROGAN: Always chickens.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know why. I have no idea. It’s easy.

JOE ROGAN: That’s why. Fate.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Fate.

JOE ROGAN: You’re designed to be the greatest folk art fan.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What’s my next song? Folk art fate.

JOE ROGAN: Thinker of all time. Folk art fate. Imagine if that’s what it is. Like there’s something compelling you to tell the world about chicken folk art.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I guess.

Life with Chickens

JOE ROGAN: So why chickens? Do you have chickens?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I do have chickens.

JOE ROGAN: I have chickens.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I love chickens.

JOE ROGAN: Chickens are great, right?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re awesome.

JOE ROGAN: They’re really cute. The ladies I go in the yard.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I say, “Hey, ladies.” I give them all the scraps. They love everything from the table. Like, any leftovers. It’s funny to watch them, though, because they’re picky. Like, the other day, I thought they would eat leftover breakfast casserole. Wouldn’t touch it, really. But they were all, they didn’t eat the biscuits. Chickens don’t like biscuits.

JOE ROGAN: Well, maybe they know the breakfast casserole is eggs. And they’re like, “Jesus Christ, this lady’s f*ing nuts. She’s trying to turn us into cannibals.”

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Ridiculous. But I didn’t think about that. Maybe it’s like, oh, no, what have I done to my ladies?

The Predatory Nature of Chickens

JOE ROGAN: It might be like a natural reaction to this. Them, I’ll tell you what they go crazy for is mice. Have you ever seen? Oh, yeah. Yeah. So this is how I found out. I used to have a house in California. My wife, she changed our back fence. It was a wrought iron fence, and she changed it to glass. And when she did, she signed a death warrant for a bunch of hawks. And they kept slamming into that f*ing glass. And like, three of them died in our yard.

And one of them got KO’d, but survived. And I was on the road, and she had told me about it, and they’d taken this hawk and they had put it in a box. And when I got back, we got them what’s called pinkies. And what pinkies are, are these little baby mice that feed them to lizards and snakes. Like, that’s what they’re for. Like, when you go to the pet store, they sell you these things. They’re not weaned from their mother. And you feed them the snakes. I know it’s dark.

So they bought a bunch of them and fed this hawk these little baby mice, and it ate all of them except one. And my daughters were very young at the time. And they’re like, “We want to keep that mouse. We want to raise it.” I’m like, “Honey, you can’t. It’s not going to live. Like, it’s not weaned from its mother. It won’t survive.” I go, “I’m just going to go see if the chickens will eat it.”

I put this thing down, and these chickens attacked like they were raptors from Jurassic Park. One chicken grabbed it and they all chased her around. They were stealing it from her, pulling it out of her mouth. It is that they are so ferocious. Like, you’ve never seen anything like a chicken with a mouse.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’ve never heard this in my life.

JOE ROGAN: I’m going to show you a video. And this video, there’s a bunch of videos of cats with mice. So this is a mouse. And look at these chickens. They just kill this mouse. And look, they all attack each other, trying to steal the mouse away from the one chicken.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Do they eat it?

JOE ROGAN: Oh, they eat it quick. Yeah, they devour it. So there’s another mouse in there that they don’t know about yet. So see, there’s one with a cat. So the cat is playing with the mouse. Like, you know, cats don’t kill it. They want to play, and this chicken just runs over and snatches it from the cat.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have never heard this in my life.

JOE ROGAN: So look, the cat has a mouse and chickens like, “Give me that, bitch.” Look, it’s got a mouse. And the cat’s like, “Jesus Christ, you guys are psychos.”

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, who knew?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, well, because they’re dinosaurs. That’s who they are. They’re just dinosaurs that are really small that survived the impact of the asteroid.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I also love dinosaurs, so maybe that’s why chickens, I’m called Paint My fault, chicken.

JOE ROGAN: You just don’t realize how ruthless they are.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’ve never heard this in my life. This is blowing. I’m country as a pumpkin, and I’ve never heard of this.

JOE ROGAN: They destroy mice. Yeah. Destroy them. They love them. They tear them apart.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I’m not going to go do that. But I’m glad I note that now.

JOE ROGAN: Like, nothing I’ve ever seen before. We also saw a mouse that got loose in the chicken coop once. We had a big chicken coop, and a mouse went in there, and I saw these chickens just tear that mouse.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: My breakfast casserole is not offensive to them.

JOE ROGAN: Eating their own babies.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re not. We don’t have a rooster.

JOE ROGAN: Well, I know, but they don’t know that. You know, they brood sometimes.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I know. I just let them sometimes. And I’m like, do you? Well, I just, like, sometimes they look at me like, “Let me just sit on this.” Like, okay, you can have it. That’s your eggnot.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, but they pluck their feathers out. They get real, it makes you sad. It’s like they want to be a mommy.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They do.

The Rooster Problem

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. You don’t let them. We had a rooster once, but he did not last.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I do not enjoy having roosters.

JOE ROGAN: They’re roosters, motherf*ers. Yeah, he attacked my wife.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And she’s like, “We’re done out on a rooster.”

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, they’re assholes, but they’re doing it because they’re trying to protect their hens. Like, they don’t know that you’re okay. They just think this big f*ing thing is moving around their hens like this giant person.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re also mean to the hens. Real mean. Brutal. Ripping their feathers out. I’m like, I can’t do it.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, they’re nasty.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: How many do y’all have chickens?

JOE ROGAN: We have 15. 15 or 16.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Y’all name them?

JOE ROGAN: Yes. I don’t name them, but my daughter and my wife names them. But the rooster, he, we only let him got. He got to maturity, and then we gave him to a friend. We’re like, “This motherf*er can’t.” I was going to kill him.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re mean.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. He attacked me. I went into the, oh, it was like, “You just got to, like, show him who’s boss.” He’s like, “No, no, I’ll attack you too, bitch.”

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, exactly.

JOE ROGAN: He attacked me. I was like, “Bitch, I was kill you.” And so to avoid killing him, I gave him away because I was totally ready to kill him.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Because when I go in there, he’d face off against me and just leap at me and grab me.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: My attack. Me too. And dad dealt with it. I don’t know what happened to him, but dad dealt with it.

JOE ROGAN: Soup turned him into soup. That’s the thing about roosters, too, I guess. You can’t just outright eat them. They’re really tough. So if you do kill them, you got to either slow cook over or turn them into soup.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, we probably did. He didn’t tell me.

Cockfighting and Animal Welfare

JOE ROGAN: I had a landscaper back when I lived in LA who used to fight chickens, and he took me over his place.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I hate that.

JOE ROGAN: It was crazy.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I hate it.

JOE ROGAN: He had like, hundred. Hundred roosters.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: We have done boxers. My nation has done, we’re not just, we don’t just help dogs. We help all animals. But dogs are focused. But we’ve helped break up some chicken rings.

JOE ROGAN: It’s kind of crazy that it’s still, still around.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s awful. There’s some, it’s always out. Like, we have a farm in Tennessee, and there’s, there’s a whole, this whole farm down the road, and they keep them in tiny cages, and every time we report them, every time, they just pay the fine. You know what I mean?

JOE ROGAN: Well, it’s a part of the culture. That’s the problem. And they all gamble on it. I know he was Mexican and, you know, from Mexico, and he had all these friends that lived in this neighborhood where he lived in, like, you might as well have been in Mexico. It was crazy. Everything was in Spanish. And when I went over his place, it’s like his buddy. We went over his buddy’s place. His buddy had like, a hundred cages in the backyard in a pit where they would take the roosters. Yeah. And they put spurs on them.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s so terrible.

JOE ROGAN: I mean, knives on their claws.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: We try to, like, we got to be part of some of the, but when you confiscate that many mean, yeah. I mean, you can’t reintroduce them into the world, like.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You know what I mean? They’re taught to be mean. They’re bred for that.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. And they’ll breed champion roosters from champion other roosters.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Let’s just stick to our little backyard hens. How about that?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. It’s just, it’s a weird thing because their culture has been, they fight them, and then they take the loser and they cook them.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And, you know, he was making it seem like it was no big deal, and it was like, to them was their gambling recreation. They would all gather around and guys would come from long distances to bring their chickens to fight.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I hate it. Yeah.

The Problem with Dog Fighting

JOE ROGAN: To me, it doesn’t freak me out as much as dog fighting. Dog fighting drives me nuts. Because pit bulls are the, look, they’re very dangerous because they have a very high prey drive, and they often don’t, they confuse children with other animals. But as pets, they are the most loyal, sweetest kind. They love you to death. They love you so much.

But there’s so many bad ones and so many ones that are raised just to fight. And that part of our culture, that part of society, like the underground dog fighting part is like, how can you do that to a dog? Like, how can you do that to the best animals come out of the.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Ark, is what it is. I feel like I have some friends that are huge into pit bull rescue, and when they’re either rehabilitated or just, they get a bad rap, period. Right? Like, say, any metro shelter you go to, it’s 90% pit bulls. Because people are afraid.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They get such a bad reputation. But there are some amazing pities that weren’t ever in the fighting rings. They were just overbred and, you know, taken out of a confiscation of a hoarding situation or breaking up the fighting ring. And it’s the mama dog that’s just been having puppies. And I just wish people would at least open their minds and hearts to, like, there are some amazing pities out there or pity mixes, you know.

JOE ROGAN: There are, but they’re also very dangerous.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I get it.

JOE ROGAN: I know they are on other dogs. They will fight those dogs to the death.

Dog Adoption and Breed Considerations

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I think they have to be vetted. Has to be a well-vetted shelter or adoption, you know, but the problem—

JOE ROGAN: Is oftentimes you don’t know their behavior until they’re around other dogs.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: I’ve had dogs that were great around people, and then I’d get them around any dog, and their hackles would go up, and they immediately wanted to fight. And you’re like, oh, God. And then you’re the asshole, because your dog is pulling on the leash, and you’re like, I’m sorry, let me get them out of here.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: I know they’re dangerous. They’re dangerous in that regard because they really are bred to fight.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And I think it takes a special household and owner, too, to really kind of handle a dog like that. Our best friends Gwen, she’s in my band, and her and her husband are longtime pit bull rescue family. And they just know how to deal with them. And they come around our dogs, they’re fine. Everything’s fine. But it’s definitely an alpha male. They kind of show him his boss right away, and they sort of understand the food chain of the house. You know what I mean?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. There’s dogs that are great dogs, but they just need a lot of attention. Like, if you have a German shepherd or a Belgian Malinois, you got to give those things something.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. You got to know what kind of breed you’re getting. I feel like people—I always preach, adopt, don’t shop, but I still think within the adoption, you really need to go, I’m going to spend some time with this dog. I’m going to talk to his foster family. I’m going to foster it, just to really understand what kind of breed you’re getting. If you want a lazy, cuddly thing, but still protector, get a Pyrenees. You know what I mean?

JOE ROGAN: Just know what you’re getting.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Just understand, is my household ready? Because there’s a lot of—what breaks my heart the most is the owner surrenders and the returns at the shelters. You know what I mean? It’s like, you didn’t think through what you were doing.

JOE ROGAN: The dog already thought it had a home, and now you bring them—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right. Because you wanted a lazy dog and you got a cow dog and it needs to run.

Great Pyrenees and Golden Retrievers

JOE ROGAN: Great Pyrenees are great because they’re kind of a combination of like a lab and a protecting dog. They’re a great little balance.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: I have a friend who has a Pyrenees, and it’s such a good dog. And he’s like, listen, man, if coyotes come around here, this f*ing dog—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, yeah, we’re not—

JOE ROGAN: Hooks them up.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yep.

JOE ROGAN: I go, really? He goes, oh, yeah. You ain’t never seen a change of personality like this dog when it sees a coyote.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But then they’re laid up on the couch with their legs in the sweetest—

JOE ROGAN: Just rub my belly.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s the best.

JOE ROGAN: I have a golden. He’s the best. Unless you’re a squirrel. And then he’s hell, then he’s a demon. He’s a squirrel killer. But other than that, he’s the sweetest boy. He’s just so nice to everybody. Everybody who comes over the house, you’re my best friend.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Goldens are the best.

JOE ROGAN: They’re so sweet, but I love them all.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I love them all. We have a chihuahua. I mean, you’re getting a Chihuahua. You know what you’re getting.

JOE ROGAN: Mean as hell and nervous.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, my God. She’s 16 and blind, and she still tries to bite. She don’t know where you are, but she’s like, but I could get you.

JOE ROGAN: 16 is old and blind.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s a bat, but—

JOE ROGAN: Oh, my God.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Senior dog house over here.

JOE ROGAN: Have you had her since she was a baby?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Wow.

Life with Multiple Rescue Dogs

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Doctor from a shelter when she was like eight weeks old. Yeah. We got two seniors now, but I’ve lost—I was crazy dog lady when my husband met me. And I had eight rescues. It seems crazy now, but I have farm and land and three Pyrenees, two golden mixes and then three little—I don’t know what’s—and I’ve lost one every year for six years.

And so after this, we have two seniors left. And my husband’s like, my heart can’t take this. He never had dogs growing up. He loves dogs. But he was like, this is awful. Ever since we met, we’ve lost one. Cause they’re stair step in age. And so I’m like, I need a—my heart needs a break a little bit.

JOE ROGAN: It’s hard. Yeah, it’s hard when they die. It’s hard. It’s so hard. You’re so close to them, and they only lived to be not long enough or 13, and then it’s over.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re put here to show us true love. They really are.

The Evolution of Dogs from Wolves

JOE ROGAN: Meanwhile, what they are is we took wolves and turned them into bitches. That’s what really would happen. I have a King Charles spaniel, you know, he’s the sweetest. He is the sweetest. He’s so cute. You pick him up, he just kisses your face. He’s just so adorable. That was a wolf. At one time, someone took a wolf and turned that wolf into a bitch. And you’re not enough of a bitch. Let me turn you into more of a bitch and more floppy.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Now we have Bernadoodles.

JOE ROGAN: It’s so weird what humans have done to dogs, that we’ve created all these totally helpless, little tiny breeds.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I know, it’s weird.

JOE ROGAN: Shih Tzus and all these little tiny things. Yeah, these little—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But they’re all amazing. And there’s plenty at the shelter that y’all should go check out.

JOE ROGAN: Look, they’re amazing. I love them. But it is a weird thing that we’ve done.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I know.

JOE ROGAN: Because they all used to be wolves at one point in time.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: That’s got to be the weirdest transformation of an animal by human interaction.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I mean, I just wonder, the first one to do it, like—well, do we know?

JOE ROGAN: They think it was just cavemen by the fire and wolves would come around and they had killed something, they’d throw them a bone, and the relationship became the wolves would let them know if intruders were coming. And then eventually, they softened to the point where they could sleep with these people. So they were like household animals, or at least stay around the house. And they trusted them to protect their children.

And then, you know, then they developed different breeds that were better at herding sheep.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Because you got to think, most wolves killed sheep.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: So all of a sudden, you could teach a dog to make sure the sheep don’t get killed by wolves, which is nuts.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And it’s incredible to watch.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And watching dogs, like bird dogs.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: One of my favorite—and also the canine units they blow my mind. The things these dogs can do and the stamina they have. And, you know—

Belgian Malinois: The Ultimate Working Dog

JOE ROGAN: Well, I think the biggest freak dog that’s ever been created is the Belgian Malinois.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, yeah.

JOE ROGAN: That is a f*ing crazy dog. When you see them run up walls and fly through—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But that’s one of the dogs. You’re like, you need to know what you’re getting because—

JOE ROGAN: Oh, yeah, you need a dude—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That can run with his dog all—

JOE ROGAN: Day and you can’t leave him alone. And you can’t, hey, man, can you watch my dog? I’m going to be gone for a week. That dog’s coming with you, bitch.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Exactly.

JOE ROGAN: You need to—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That dog’s watching you.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. That dog needs activity.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Have you ever seen the video of the difference between the way a German shepherd approaches an assailant versus a Belgian Malinois?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No.

JOE ROGAN: So they do these drills where they have a bunch of chairs in a room, and the German shepherd runs around the chairs to try to get to the guy who’s got the bite suit on. The Belgian Malinois goes over all the chairs. Just flies through the air, barely touching the chairs. Watch this. So here’s the shepherd. See how the shepherd runs around and he’s like, I’m going to get you. And he finds you and he bites you. Watch the Belgian Malinois, as soon as they let him go, he’s like, f* these chairs. Right over them.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s incredible.

JOE ROGAN: They’re just meat missiles. They’re meat missiles. They’re designed to go f* things up. That’s their task all day long. And they’re crazy smart. They’re really smart, intimidating. Oh, yeah. They look at you like a raptor in Jurassic Park. They’re checking you out.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: What are we doing? Am I killing you? Or are you just one of my—my dad.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Perfect. Perfect.

JOE ROGAN: Looking right at you like this.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And you’re like, can I pet it or is he at work right now?

JOE ROGAN: He’s working.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. I don’t ever pet Malinois unless I know for sure. Yeah, they’re just—that’s a working dog. It’s a different thing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Same.

JOE ROGAN: You know, I mean. But it’s also kind of crazy that they figured out a way to make a dog into that. Like how you can make a dog into my dog, which is just a cuddle. But he just—he’s just a cuddle bug. He just wants to lie down with you. Today we’re watching TV, he just cuddles up. He’s like got his head in my lap and I’m petting him. We’re watching TV. He’s like, that’s a wolf.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He used to be a wolf. The only one I think about in my house that used to be a wolf is my chihuahua because she’s the meanest.

JOE ROGAN: How ironic. That’s so funny. But it’s just so crazy that they figured out a way to make a wolf into a thing that protects animals from wolves.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I didn’t think about it like that.

Caucasian Shepherds: The Giant Protectors

JOE ROGAN: I mean, some of them. Have you ever seen that shepherd dog? That crazy giant one from Russia. What is it called? Not from Russia. It’s like a mountain shepherd. It looks like a werewolf and it’s got really crazy thick hair because of the climate that it lives in. But it’s like 200 pounds, like this enormous thing that protects. Caucasian shepherd. That’s it. Caucasian shepherd. It literally looks like a werewolf. Like the werewolf that we have out front. American werewolf in London. That’s what it looks like. And they just protect. Look at that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, I’ve seen those. I just didn’t know what they were called.

JOE ROGAN: Crazy. See if you can find one that’s doing bite work.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But look, that one looks sweet.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. Unless you break into the house. I mean, that thing’s crazy. Google Caucasian shepherd training. Yeah. Or bite.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh God. That does look like the thing in the front.

JOE ROGAN: That’s fake. But look at the side. That’s one pretending to—so there’s one that’s doing bite work though, in that other image. That’s the word for them. This is like a word of charka. That is a big a dog. And that’s another dog that they use to protect against wolves. Look at the size of that sucker.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Huge.

JOE ROGAN: So what are they doing here?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Where are they? They’re Russian.

JOE ROGAN: That looks like they’re transporting it. Training YouTube channel. Oh, okay. They’re training it. Yeah. With a big bag of sh*y dog food. That dog food that people buy. I know, that stuff’s so terrible.

Dog Food and Pet Care

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You do Farmer’s Dog?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. We started off with another company called Maev, which is great, it’s frozen. But just the way he eats Farmer’s Dog, the way they eat it, it must taste way better. And it’s the same kind of thing. It’s real food, it’s frozen. Get it frozen, thaw it out and feed it to him when he’s ready to eat. They love it. Devours it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I had to start that with my senior dogs because they just had all kinds of things, and everybody had ailments and needed pills and everything else. And I was just like, all right, we’re just going to do the expensive dog food. But I had three Pyrenees rescues, two golden mixes, and three littler dogs. I’m like, this is $700 a batch for all y’all to eat. So I started making it for a while too. I would just make ground turkey.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, that’s great.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: But I just couldn’t keep up with it. I mean, Farmer’s Dog will use too.

JOE ROGAN: Well, it’s definitely way better than regular dog food. Anything that can sit on a shelf can’t be good for you. It just can’t. It’s filled with preservatives, and that’s not good for you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Us living on Cheetos, I feel like.

JOE ROGAN: Exactly.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Sometimes I want to eat them. Sometimes I love them.

JOE ROGAN: But if you were stuck in a cabin for a week and you couldn’t get out and there’s an unlimited supply of Cheetos in the cabin, you’re going to live, right? But you’re not going to feel real good.

Tour Riders and Backstage Life

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No. I was like, what’s on your rider? I’m like, Cheetos and Tito’s kind of all I need.

JOE ROGAN: Is that it? That’s your rider? Cheetos and Tito. That’s hilarious. Some people have Wagyu.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: What’s on your rider?

JOE ROGAN: Not much.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have a cheese tray, maybe.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, I have a meat tray. When I was drinking, we would definitely have some whiskey on there and maybe a bottle of wine, but I really don’t drink anymore. Not that I—yeah, I wasn’t an alcoholic, so it’s not like I can’t drink. I had a glass of wine with dinner the other night, but I don’t drink anymore.

I would go to my comedy club with my friends, or we’d go on the road. I’d have a couple of glasses of this and a couple glasses of that and a margarita at dinner, and then the next day, I’d feel like shit. And it wasn’t ever like I couldn’t stop. It was just I did. And then one day, I was like, I think I’m just going to stop for a while and see how I feel. And I felt so much better. So much better, because I was drinking two or three nights a week, sometimes four. Go out on a date with my wife, I have a couple of drinks. I go to the comedy club, have a couple of drinks. Maybe I have a drink or two with someone in the studio.

Drinking Culture in Show Business

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, it just—I mean, I feel like that’s showbiz. I mean, it’s just part of it. It’s part of our culture. And we have to bring the party, too. That’s the other thing.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: How am I supposed to bring the party if I’m not partying with you?

JOE ROGAN: Right. That’s a problem.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Especially in the honky tonk days. I came up in beer joints. I’m talking about five bars. I mean, you just start getting in it with people, and then you’re on your day off, you’re like, oh, we’re going to have a nice date and have a drink. I mean, it just spirals.

JOE ROGAN: I know.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I love it. I love red wine. It’s my favorite.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. I don’t hate drinking. I just hate how I feel the next day. But I’m not—I’d say I’ll never do it again, but for now, I’m not doing it anymore. But I’ll still have a drink or two. Not even two. A drink. I didn’t even have a full glass of wine the other night. I had a half glass of wine. I’m like, we’re good. But if somebody has a bottle of Buffalo Trace and we’re sitting around talking shit, I want to have a couple of drinks, I might.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You’re just giving yourself permission to be wherever you are.

Health and Moderation

JOE ROGAN: I’m just trying to be healthier is what it is. And I recognize that if I do all these healthy things for my body, I work out all the time, I eat so well, I take all these vitamins—why am I letting myself get poisoned four nights a week? That seems stupid, especially with my lifestyle. It’s like, it’s better. Even if I just limit it to one night a week, it’s better. But really, it’s better just not.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: The reality is, it’s not good for you.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, I know, but it’s fun.

JOE ROGAN: It is fun. It is fun. Getting, catching a buzz is fun. Some of my favorite podcasts we’ve ever done, when we do Protect Our Parks, we get hammered. Yeah, they’re fun.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, I bet.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. I mean, people aren’t doing it because they’re stupid.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Right.

JOE ROGAN: There’s a reason why they enjoy being drunk.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And have for thousands, thousands of years. I mean, it’s probably responsible for so many relationships starting in the first place. So many people meeting people, so many fun friendships.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: A lot of the memories, too, on the road, after the show, when everybody’s just really being themselves.

Alcohol as a Culturally Acceptable Drug

JOE ROGAN: It’s also a culturally acceptable drug that most people know how to consume. I mean, they might do it wrong or they might get too drunk or DUI or be an ahole. It’s possible. But it’s enough of a normal thing that a good percentage of people know when they’ve had enough and they know the right dose. You have a couple drinks, I’m good. You know where you’re at. Whereas any other drug that you’re trying today is illegal.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And any other drug, it’s like, who knows what’s going to happen, right?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And if you want to go next door, really next door?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m going down the street.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, you can go down the street with whiskey, with a margarita. Whiskey. Go to another town.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s martinis. Everybody knows, do not drink more than two martinis. Are you an insane person? You can’t.

JOE ROGAN: Everybody knows it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Everyone should know it. I feel like that’s what really—

JOE ROGAN: You know Bert Kreischer? That can put some martinis down.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Really. I’m like, two’s good. That’s straight up.

JOE ROGAN: Well, you’re smart.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Just straight. I mean, and then have your glass. Whatever you want have to. When you see somebody sitting at a bar by themselves at 3 o’clock, and then you’re like, dang, that’s their third martini. They’re about to hit the deck, and they’re fine. I’m like, something’s going to happen later. Something’s going to happen later.

JOE ROGAN: They probably do it all the time. That’s the thing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s the—here’s your sign. Yeah.

Types of Liquor

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. It’s supposedly better for you, right? Isn’t it? You drink Tito’s. A vodka martini is probably—is a gin martini the same?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know. I’m a Tito’s and Topo’s gal. Tito’s and Topo.

JOE ROGAN: They say that clear liquor is better for you, right? Don’t they say that?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know. We’ve made excuses for every single thing we want to do today.

JOE ROGAN: They say tequila is the best nicotine.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Is great for us.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s good for the person.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Clear. It’s awesome.

JOE ROGAN: It’s supposedly better for you, isn’t it? Is there a reason why clear liquor is—a real reason why clear liquor—additives in it. There you go. Less additives. That’s it. I’m pretty sure, yeah. I mean, even tequila has got—you’ve got to find the good stuff, right? But if you find the good—that’s the other thing. I was reading this thing about how much tequila is fake. How much tequila is not really made with agave.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s a real—that’s a lot.

JOE ROGAN: That’s a lot.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, it’s a lot of fake. A lot. Hurt your a. I mean, tequila will—it’s not forgiving if you abuse it.

JOE ROGAN: It’s a certain kind of drunk too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Don’t ask me how I know.

JOE ROGAN: Tequila is like a shootout with the cops drunk.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. That’s like I shot my TV with my shotgun.

JOE ROGAN: It’s a high speed chase drug. Tequila just like, ooh, we were drunk on tequila.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yikes.

Music, Comedy, and Drinking Culture

JOE ROGAN: You just picture yourself doing something definitely incorrect. Yeah. It’s a funny thing that—I guess it makes sense though, that music and comedy in a lot of ways is connected to drinking because drinking lowers inhibitions and it makes you want to sing along and it makes you want to dance. And maybe you don’t feel like you got the confidence to dance, but you get a couple shots. F* it, let’s get on the dance floor.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s like, raise your—it’s like a feeling. And you’re part of the party and you’re part of the song and you’re part of the show or whatever. I just think, especially—I think music and comedy are the most as far as show business, that people just feel like that’s something that they go there to do.

JOE ROGAN: Right. Well, the two things that you have to go see live, you don’t have to. I mean, you can just listen to music in your phone and all that stuff. But the reality is it’s way better if you’re there live. Yeah, like live. Going to see live music to me is so inspirational because I don’t have any skill at live music at all. I don’t have any musical talent. I can’t play any instruments. So it’s just—I don’t ever think like, huh, I wonder why they did it that way. I see where they’re going.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You can just enjoy it.

JOE ROGAN: I could just be entertained.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s great.

The Power of Music

JOE ROGAN: And it’s—I think music is a drug in and of itself. Because it does something to your—a great song does something very powerful to you. It’ll make you feel powerful emotions or powerful inspiration. It does something that nothing else does in a weird way.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And it feels so good. When you have a song that somebody comes up and says, “That song changed my life. That song—” I have one called “House That Built Me.” That’s the one. People come up to me the most and are like, “That’s my story.” And I didn’t write it. I’m like, but that’s when I heard it. That’s why I was like, this is my story too.

And those are the—and as a songwriter, when you write a song like that, that’s the ultimate reminder. This is why I do that. It made somebody feel something. It made somebody get through something. It made somebody want to punch somebody. Whatever the emotion is, as long as it brings out emotion, we’ve done our job, right.

JOE ROGAN: Think of how many people you’ve done that to. How nuts that is. You’ve had so many hit songs, so you’ve had so many songs that resonated with people where they all felt that feeling when that song came on. Like, “Oh, this is my song. This is my song.” Turned it up.

The Feisty Firecracker

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have the feisty. A lot of the feisty. I mean, I’m a little calmer now, but I used to be quite the firecracker. There’s a reason I have revolvers tattooed on, but now I’m shooting them off horses. Just a little pistol personality, I guess.

And so my feisty songs, I mean, at every single show, pretty much every single show, there’s a girl fight in the pit. Every. Yeah, they just get riled up. Girl fights. They get riled up. I’m telling you.

JOE ROGAN: I wonder if you have more girl fights than other female singers.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know.

JOE ROGAN: I bet you do. If every single show you have—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Almost every show.

JOE ROGAN: I bet that’s real odd. Have you talked to other female singers? Do they have similar stories?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: How many girls thought you should, though?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, you should ask. You should totally ask.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Because it’s towards this part where I call it my ramp up. It’s like “Gunpowder and Lead,” “Little Red Wagon,” “Mama’s Broken Heart.” And they just start getting—

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. They think about their ex, that motherf*er.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Or he’s there. It’s just a lot.

JOE ROGAN: And he’s there with—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have a front row seat today. I’ll stop if it gets real bad. I just stop and go, “Hey, y’all, tone her down a little bit.”

JOE ROGAN: Really? Every show?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Almost every show.

JOE ROGAN: That’s really odd, Miranda.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I know.

JOE ROGAN: I think that’s odd. I think that might be a very specific reaction that you have on people.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Maybe I need—I mean, I’m pretty calm now. I’m like, “It’s all right. We got some ballads coming up. Everybody take a sip, take a seat, y’all calm down.”

JOE ROGAN: I think it’s great. They’re feeling something.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. You know, bringing out emotion.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. My job, 100%. Yeah. I bet it’s great at the gym, those songs.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Think about that bitch they punch at the concert on the elliptical machine.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I have a lot of those. “Girl, you’re my bitch.” Those kind of girls. And I love it. I love it.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Yeah. You can’t buy that. That’s a weird feeling.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. You have to earn that feeling.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You’ll have to come to a show that’s one that I know for sure is going to be one of those.

JOE ROGAN: I would love to.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And I would love to watch from off the stage.

The McConaughey Event

JOE ROGAN: I loved you at the McConaughey event. It was amazing.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s such a cool event, too.

JOE ROGAN: Such a good event.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And I love all those boys. And Jack. I mean, Jack Ingram’s one of my heroes from back in the day. I started watching him when I was 15, and he had such charisma, and that’s why I want to do that, you know?

JOE ROGAN: Oh, really?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s awesome. Yeah. I’ve known him for a really long time.

JOE ROGAN: It’s such a cool thing when you’re going to an event like that, and it’s for a great cause, so everybody’s super positive about why they’re there. It’s not just to have fun. It’s also—it does such an amazing service for people.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It does. And they do such a good job with that show. They do together so well.

JOE ROGAN: You know who blew me away at that show, too, is Lucas.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, he’s great. I love him. He is great.

JOE ROGAN: People are like, “Oh, it’s Willie Nelson’s son.” I’m like, okay, that’ll be cool. And then he started singing. I was like, holy shit. This guy’s f*ing great.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He’s great.

JOE ROGAN: He’s not just good, he’s great.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Great musician, and he’s a great guy.

JOE ROGAN: Sweetheart.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: A sweetheart.

JOE ROGAN: Super sweetheart.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. I’ve had the pleasure of getting to know him now. He’s a really nice guy. Genuine nice guy. But, God, can he sing, especially when—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: He does that—when he really leans into the soul, more soul stuff, it just makes him shine because it’s just so different than what people would think it was going to be.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You know?

JOE ROGAN: Right. And his pipes.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Whoa.

JOE ROGAN: The notes he—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: When he goes for it, he sings with his body. His whole body. You know he’s going for it, and I love it. And he does this—I don’t know, it’s going to hurt later in life, but he does this back bend thing. He’s on his knees. He’s bent all the way back playing a guitar solo. And I’m like, God, how does he do that? Is that adrenaline or what? Is that stretching?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah, it’s just stretching.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I could probably do that a decade ago, not now.

JOE ROGAN: I bet you could.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m not going to try. Well, not on stage.

Core Strength and Pilates

JOE ROGAN: Well, you must have core strength to be on that horse when you’re shooting at things.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Stabilizing yourself.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I ride so much better when I’m doing consistent Pilates.

JOE ROGAN: I did Pilates once with my wife. I was like, oh, there you go. A lot harder. It’s like yoga in a way that people think, “Oh, yoga, you just go in and stretch.” No, no, no. Go do it. It’s f*ing hard. It’s hard. And Pilates is hard. I was like, oh, this is weird. This is using weird muscles.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Shaky ones. You’re like, why am I shaking?

JOE ROGAN: Stabilizing muscles. But it’s a really good thing to balance out other stuff, you know? But that would definitely improve your core strength and allow you to be able to—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: When I first started riding, I was—I’m still not great, and I still have fear, you know, on a horse. I’m just not super comfortable all the time, you know, when we’re going fast. So I’m just learning to work up to that.

But when I first started riding, I didn’t start riding a horse ever till I was 30 years old. And I wish I’d started at four, when I was fearless. You know what I mean? But starting at 30 and getting on this giant animal, and you don’t know what you’re doing. And my trainer at the time was like, “You need to do Pilates.” So I started Pilates and it really helped me stabilize myself a little more.

JOE ROGAN: That’s interesting. Your trainer told you to do Pilates to help horse riding?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She was my—she was training my horses and teaching me how to ride. She was like, “You do not have core strength at all. You need to go do Pilates.”

JOE ROGAN: That’s interesting that you would choose that. Huh? I guess that makes sense. But I would think that there’s other stuff you could do too. You ever see a—what a BOSU ball is? You know, standing on that ball with a flat bottom to it where you bounce?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yes. And they have this—it’s this saddle you sit on and it’s for that. It’s almost like one of those balls. But it’s a saddle you sit on like if you were sitting on a yoga ball, but it’s a saddle.

My shooting coach, Kenda, my friend Kenda, she’ll tell me, “Get your gun belt on and get your guns out and sit on your—is that the yoga ball? The big one, the big workout ball? Sit on that and shoot off that.”

JOE ROGAN: That makes sense.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s when you’re doing your drills to stabilize.

JOE ROGAN: It’s all just about stabilizing. I know a lot of people that sit at their desk on one of those.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Which is smart, I guess.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m glad I don’t have to sit at a desk. I don’t think I’d do well.

JOE ROGAN: Well, I have to sit at this desk. But these chairs, they keep you upright. These are really good.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, they’re comfy.

JOE ROGAN: They’re good. They make you sit correctly or at least encourage you to sit correctly rather than a—when you started doing that when you were 30, how long did it take before you started shooting guns off of—

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I just started that last year.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, okay.

Learning to Ride

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I mean, I just started last year. I started—I showed Gypsy Vanners. They’re draft, lazy draft horses kind of. I got into those because I was 30 and I can’t afford to get hurt. I’m on the road all the time, so I wanted something safe to learn on.

JOE ROGAN: Have you fallen before?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Really?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I mean, I tried to do hunter jumper. I thought I wanted to be—I was all excited. I’m like, “I’m going to be a cowgirl.” At 30 years old. I’m like, “I’m going to finally be a cowgirl. I want to barrel race.”

Well, then I learned that’s—I don’t want to barrel race, which kind of the guns—it’s patterns and it’s going fast around. You have to go around a barrel. So kind of back to that. But this old cowboy trainer where I got my first horse, he was like, “You need to go take English lessons because you need your fundamentals, because you can’t—you’re not just going to get a western saddle and act like you know what you’re doing. Go take lessons.” Because English is so proper.

JOE ROGAN: What is English lesson?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: English is the hunter jumpers, dressage. It’s the very proper, you know, English riding. It teaches you the fundamentals. Look, I’m sitting up straighter, talking about it. Whereas western is a lot more loose. And so it just taught me a lot taking English lessons.

But I thought I’d do hunter jumper, which is jumping over the poles.

JOE ROGAN: Right.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And that’s where I really hit the ground a few times. I wasn’t ready for that. You know what I mean?

JOE ROGAN: Yeah.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s been a cool journey. It’s just—I mean, it’s a lot to learn.

JOE ROGAN: It’s a lot to learn. I’m imagining it’s also rough on the body, too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Yeah. That’s why I’m like, give me your safest—my horse, he is super safe. I just—I don’t—I want to learn really badly, and I want to grow and be better, but I don’t want to do it at a certain cost.

JOE ROGAN: Do you enter competitions or anything?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I showed my Vanners for 10 years.

JOE ROGAN: What does that mean?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I just went to horse shows, and—

JOE ROGAN: You said some words I don’t understand. “I showed my Vanners.”

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Sounds dirty when you say it back like that. No, it’s my Gypsy Vanners. Vanners are the kind of horses I have, so I went and showed them in competitions. Just English pleasure, Western pleasure. Just riding around the rail. And it’s about your technique and—

JOE ROGAN: Oh, okay.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s not jumping or—so when English—

JOE ROGAN: It’s just about being in control of the horse.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yep. It’s your technique, making the horse listen to—yeah. And then I got into shooting, and I’m not going back.

JOE ROGAN: Are you going to do competitions with the shooting?

Mounted Shooting Competition

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I did one last year just to get my first one out of the way. And it was fun. I mean, scary. Scary as sh*t, honestly. But all these girls I ride with are so good. They go a hundred miles an hour. I’ve got to show you Kenda.

JOE ROGAN: Is there a video of her?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. She’s amazing.

JOE ROGAN: What’s her last name?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Lenseigne. It’s L, A N S E I G N E. Google it. I’m selling it.

JOE ROGAN: Jamie will find it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She’s amazing. And they go so fast. It’s a timed event, right? So you’re competing just against you really, how precise and how fast you can go on your horse.

JOE ROGAN: So you have a green light and then you go?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Green light. You go.

JOE ROGAN: How do they start you off?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They flag.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, they drop a flag. And then you go.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: And then you go. I didn’t go that fast. I did mine in 28 seconds. She does it in eight seconds.

JOE ROGAN: Same course?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: It’s insane.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She’s amazing. But that’s why it’s something to work towards.

JOE ROGAN: How many times has she wiped out?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Oh, she’s broke down as hell. She’s broke down. She has cowgirl broke down, but she’s still going. She wiped out so bad last year and just gets right back on. Keeps going. Riding in a cast. It’s a cowgirl way.

JOE ROGAN: Riding in a cast. That’s tough.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They’re tough.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. People are built different.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They are.

JOE ROGAN: You got any videos? Here we go. I want to see this.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She’s awesome.

JOE ROGAN: Because I saw that you were doing that. I was like, that’s bananas. But it looks like fun.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is fun.

JOE ROGAN: Do they have one of those where they do bow and arrow?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They have bow and arrow. There she is.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, here she goes.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They have bow and arrows, rifles. The rifles are crazy.

JOE ROGAN: Imagine this lady running up to you on a ranch with a pistol in her hand.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She is legit.

JOE ROGAN: That’s crazy.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She’s one of my besties.

JOE ROGAN: Is there high speed where they’re not showing it? Here it goes. Oh, wow. Wow. That’s crazy. Oh, man. This is awesome.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She is a literal. Never misses.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, now I get it. Okay, this looks like fun.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: There’s 83 patterns, so the horse never runs the same.

JOE ROGAN: Wait a minute. How is she shooting that many times?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s five shots and a gun change.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, you have to change.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You have to change your gun. Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: So how many shots? How many shots is it total in one of these rounds where you run?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: 10.

JOE ROGAN: 10. So, okay, so you have 10 things.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: This is a highlight reel, but yeah.

JOE ROGAN: 10 shots.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. So that’s my bestie who’s teaching me how to do it.

JOE ROGAN: That’s awesome. Well, that’s how to learn.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: She’s awesome.

JOE ROGAN: Learn from a psycho. Completely insane. Serious screw loose to be good at that. Wow.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, my God. Look at this, dude. Oh, this is her.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s her and Todd.

JOE ROGAN: I don’t know what those numbers mean, but it looks awesome. It looks like fun.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah, it’s really fun. And it’s, I don’t know.

JOE ROGAN: It’s a very country thing to be involved in.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, guess what? Guess what.

JOE ROGAN: It’s perfect. Perfect. It’s perfect.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: We talked about chickens. We talked about dogs. We talked about guns. On horses.

JOE ROGAN: Archery, hunting. Fill in the blank.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Tito’s.

JOE ROGAN: And Tito’s. Exactly. That’s a very, but that’s a very country activity because it’s not just horse riding. It’s horse riding with pistols.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I mean, come on. Yeah, I love it.

Mounted Archery

JOE ROGAN: It’s funny that I didn’t know that that was such a big thing. See if there’s one where they do it with bows and arrows. I want to see that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s crazy. I haven’t seen that in person. But the rifles.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, rifles. They do too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: They do it with rifles. And you don’t have reins because you use two hands to shoot the rifle. So they’re riding with their legs.

JOE ROGAN: Whoa. Right, right. And the horses making wild turns. So you have crazy strength in your legs.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Kenda needs a lot of Pilates.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, yeah. So you can find one where they’re doing it. Bows and arrows. Because I know that that’s how the Mongols did it. That’s how the Comanches did it. They learned how to shoot while they were, they learned how to time the release of their arrow while the horse was in the air. They had the least amount of disturbance.

What is this one? Epic equestrian mounted archery. But is this a competition? I mean, I don’t know that there’s many of them. I don’t know that there’s other. Oh, yeah. So they have targets. Yeah. But this looks like a British horseback archery.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: See, that’s a, she’s in a dressage saddle doing that.

JOE ROGAN: Oh, yeah, look at this. The guy’s got the crazy Mongol hat on, too. Oh, that makes. Look at that.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s cool. Is that your hobby?

JOE ROGAN: No, I don’t f* with horses. I like them. I love them. I think they’re awesome. I don’t want to ride. There you go. There’s a whole thing for it. Oh, that’s cool.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It’s like a pattern.

JOE ROGAN: Yeah. So very similar. Similar kind of deal. Taran Tactical for horses. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Taran Tactical is a tactical range in California. That’s where Keanu Reeves learned how to shoot guns. I used to go there when I lived in California. You do, “shooter ready?”

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: And you go through a tactical course.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: That’s where we shoot. Out at Intercourse Hill is this place called Ben Avery shooting facility. And it’s all of that. It’s anything that can be shot is shot there. So Kenda had them build a rodeo arena so we could do our balloons.

JOE ROGAN: That would be the coolest thing to have on your property.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

JOE ROGAN: Have a tactical range right on your property.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: This place is huge, and it’s out there in the desert, so there’s plenty of space to do all things.

Safety and Black Powder

JOE ROGAN: That’s what I was thinking about. The shooting pistols on the horses. When did they figure out to not use bullets? Because there had to be something happened.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Something happened. And the horses wear earplugs, too, which is great.

JOE ROGAN: They probably had to figure that out later in life, too.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Horses wear earplugs.

JOE ROGAN: How many people got shot before they realized, hey, we probably shouldn’t be using real bullets to shoot these balloons?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Black powder might be a better call.

JOE ROGAN: Because you got all those people in the audience, and then you got someone on a horse.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: It is. And she catches hell for it. People are like, “you can’t be.” She’s like, it’s spectator safe. It’s safe for the horses. Everybody wears earplugs. It’s black powder.

JOE ROGAN: Who gets mad?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: People. Everybody wants to bitch about something.

JOE ROGAN: Right. You know, but that’s just how it’s going.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: You would know more than anyone. I don’t need to tell you.

JOE ROGAN: You can’t make everybody happy. It’s impossible.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: No, you can’t.

JOE ROGAN: And you’re always going to make someone mad. As long as you realize that, you’ll be okay. And as long as you stay offline.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Stay off that TikTok.

JOE ROGAN: Stay out of that river. That TikTok River. Yeah. A lot of people drown in that river.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah.

Wrapping Up

JOE ROGAN: Anything else you want to talk about? Should we wrap this up?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. I mean, we talked about every country thing you talked about.

JOE ROGAN: We basically did. Listen, you’re really fun to talk to. I really enjoy it.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Thank you for having me on here.

JOE ROGAN: My pleasure. And I love your music and I love your personality, so it was really cool to have you in here.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, come see us on the road.

JOE ROGAN: I would love to. Are you ever in…

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m playing the San Antonio rodeo next year.

JOE ROGAN: When is that? What time?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: February.

JOE ROGAN: February. Oh, okay. So in a couple of months?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Yeah. Okay.

JOE ROGAN: We’ll try to make it down for that. Are you ever in Austin, though?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I haven’t played in Austin in a long time.

JOE ROGAN: Really?

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I don’t know why. I’m here all the time and I don’t know. I need to get that on the books.

JOE ROGAN: Okay, well, I will come. I will definitely come.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: Well, thank you.

JOE ROGAN: Thank you. My pleasure. If anybody wants to go find you out on the river.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: In the river.

JOE ROGAN: Social media. The river.

MIRANDA LAMBERT: I’m on all your social media platforms. Okay.

JOE ROGAN: Thank you very much. Bye, everybody.

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