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Home » What if There’s Nothing Wrong With You: Susan Henkels (Full Transcript)

What if There’s Nothing Wrong With You: Susan Henkels (Full Transcript)

Susan Henkels at TEDxSedona

Following is the full text of psychotherapist Susan Henkels’ talk titled “What if There’s Nothing Wrong With You” at TEDxSedona conference.


I’ve been a psychotherapist for over 45 years, listening to everything that’s wrong with people.

And I was listening to a woman once talk about her whole list of what was wrong with her, and I thought, in the middle of this litany: What if there’s actually nothing wrong with her? Could that question clear the way for her to have anything she wanted — anything she wanted to have, anything she wanted to do?

Well, I’m not saying that there isn’t anything wrong with you right now. I’m just saying, what if there weren’t? So could you have more confidence and courage to do something that you have always been passionate about?

I’m learning how to play the banjo, and it’s been on my bucket list for years. So I’ve always been kind of bored with hearing people say, “It is what it is.”

It just sounded like, first of all, it was the most used cliché in 2006. Everybody was saying, “It is what it is.” And I hated it.

It was like there isn’t anything you can do about it; it was total resignation.

But what if “it is what it is” is really just that? No judgment, no blame, no criticism. What if you could just have a full plate of just “it is what it is”?

Not all that story we tell about ourselves to justify, you know, to make other people wrong and ourselves right. I mean, could we have anything other than that?

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