Daniel Hardman – TRANSCRIPT
Rewind five years to 2009. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was developing a severe issue with anxiety.
A part of the problem was, I was completely unaware of anxiety as an ongoing condition. The main component, however, was I felt like there was something I needed to do to feel worthy. Not only that, I didn’t know what that thing was. The journey I was about to embark on was to teach me some major life lessons, that I’d like to share with you today. And these have drastically improved the way I see the world.
So what does anxiety look like? It begins with negative thinking patterns, such as catastrophizing. It’s viewing situations as far worse than they actually are, or anticipating things to go wrong. Black and white thinking: thinking either I’m amazing or I’m rubbish, and nothing in between. Perfectionism: the need to do everything in the correct way. Anxiety rejects the rational thinking that combines both positive and negative aspects of the situation.
In its extreme form, it can result in avoidance and withdrawal. This instigates a cycle of guilt and shame that further reinforces the anxiety. On a biological level, a threat is recognized and the emotional center of the brain called the amygdala instigates the fight or flight response. This is absolutely necessary if you’re running away from a bear, for instance. But the problem is when the threat is imagined.
Full of adrenaline, you may feel short of breath, tight-chested and raised heart rate. One-third of people will suffer from anxiety at some point in their lives. However, could it be that it has gone even beyond that? In a world that’s getting faster and faster, we’re overworked, we’re overspending, and so on. Could it be that more and more of us are existing in a mild but perpetual state of angst? From media reports, as well as from those I know personally, I know this is becoming an epidemic, especially among my generation, known as the Millennials. We’re the most educated generation there has ever been.
However, we’re the most materialistic, in debt, obese. Celebrity and media culture have convinced us we can have everything instantly. Many say they feel frustrated not being able to find employment that motivates them, if employed at all. So how do we tackle anxiety? Is what’s needed nothing more than acquiring some rational perspectives? Back to 2009 I was at university, and anxiety was beginning to take a strong hold.
A further year passed, and I was beginning to become significantly withdrawn. From the lad who would be the life and soul of the party, I’d got to the stage where I didn’t even want to come out of my room. There was an instance when a flatmate invited me out for the evening, and, as usual, I declined. He shouted at me, “Would you just come out for once?!” It was those words that hit me. I had to make a change.
That night, turning on the TV, I saw a comedian named Russell Kane. I watched as he confidently commanded the stage, and I wondered what it would be like to feel that sense of freedom. Sometime later, I was given a book called “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.” The title itself says enough. However, this was a big turning point.