Transcript of Paul Wesley Interview: Call Her Daddy Podcast

So I was like, “I’ve got to bring Nina to a Knicks game because Jalen is going to love this.”

ALEX COOPER: Not him being a Vampire Diaries fan — like, everyone’s a huge fan of his, and he’s like, “Elena, Stefan.”

PAUL WESLEY: So I texted him right before the game. I was like, “Hey, just so you know, I’m bringing Elena to the game.” And he’s like, “No way.” And it’s so funny because that game was like a blowout.

ALEX COOPER: They blew away —

PAUL WESLEY: I forget who they were playing, but I think they won by like 50 points, which is unheard of. And I was like, “Jalen’s doing this for Elena, isn’t he? I know he is.”

ALEX COOPER: That’s actually amazing to know.

You Deserve to Know: The New Show

ALEX COOPER: Okay, in the new show that we’re doing, Nina’s husband is murdered and you are the top suspect.

PAUL WESLEY: I am.

ALEX COOPER: That is giving very different vibes from Stelena. It is very different. What are you most excited about with this new dynamic? You’re not in a romantic relationship, you’re more friends on the show.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah. You were there when we were developing it, obviously, executive producing it. Aaron Kaplan, one of the EPs, said, “Do you guys want to play romantic partners?” And Nina and I talked about it. The Stefan and Elena thing is so iconic and so perfect. In a weird way, we don’t want to — not ruin it, but have a comparison. If we were playing husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend, people would compare that to Stefan and Elena. So we wanted to create a new dynamic so that we offered something new to the fans where we’re still interacting on screen, but it’s in a different capacity.

ALEX COOPER: I know, and I really respected that because just for everyone watching, trust me, we sat there and we’re like, “So you’re sure, right, that you don’t want to be married?” And you guys are like, “Alex.” But I really respect that you guys have so much respect for the craft of what you built on Vampire Diaries. I do agree with you in a way that it would almost be hard to see you two as a couple and not be like, “Stefan and Elena — oh wait, no, this is a different show.” So I think we did it right.

PAUL WESLEY: Exactly. I think so as well.

ALEX COOPER: But don’t worry everyone, I asked.

Stories You Deserve to Know

ALEX COOPER: Since the show is called You Deserve to Know, I’m going to ask you some stories that we deserve to know.

PAUL WESLEY: The public deserves it.

ALEX COOPER: Yes, we deserve it. And you are going to tell us these stories. Okay, here we go. Tell us about your first kiss.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay. My first kiss was kind of like — I remember I used to live in this community in New Jersey where it was like townhouses, but there would be a public swimming pool. And I was in the public swimming pool. And this girl — I don’t even know who she was — she dared me to kiss her underwater. And I was like, “Let’s do this.” I had my goggles on. Maybe I was like 10 or something. And I went down there and we kissed underwater. I still remember her freckled face kissing me underwater. And none of our parents knew about it. It was really sweet.

ALEX COOPER: Not your first kiss being underwater.

PAUL WESLEY: It was underwater, with goggles and maybe even floaties. I may have taken off my floaties.

ALEX COOPER: So romantic.

PAUL WESLEY: It was romantic.

ALEX COOPER: And then eventually you did it on land, but first underwater.

PAUL WESLEY: And I remember my first on land as well, which was like my first girlfriend ever. Her name’s Carolina. Shout out. And somebody dared us to French kiss. Well, that’s a bigger deal.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, it’s huge.

PAUL WESLEY: Big deal. A French kiss behind the — after the school bus drops you off. And I was like, “Okay, I can do this.” And I just remember — you would think I would be very excited. I was just like, “I cannot believe people like this. How do people like exchanging saliva?” I was still too young to fully appreciate it. And poor Carolina, because I wasn’t hyped about it.

ALEX COOPER: You’re just putting your tongue out and closing your eyes.

PAUL WESLEY: I was like, “For dear life, let’s get through it.”

Misreading the Vibe

ALEX COOPER: Okay, cute. What is a time when you completely misread the vibe, but still shot your shot?

PAUL WESLEY: Like with a girl?

ALEX COOPER: Yeah.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh, man. Twice.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, yeah.

PAUL WESLEY: I mean, twice that I could think of. The most simplistic one is — I remember being on a date with someone who will go unnamed because she’s actually an actress. This was obviously way back in the day. I was very single, pre-Vampire Diaries. And I just remember I thought the date went really well. And I was like, “I’m going to go in for a kiss. Like a good night kiss.” And I just remember she just — I went in for the kiss and she was just like, “No.” And it was like the turn. And then I had to pretend that it wasn’t a kiss. And then it was just a hug. It was the most awkward. It was so awkward. I haven’t seen her since. Thank God.

ALEX COOPER: No, literally since that moment. Did you reach out after?

PAUL WESLEY: It was like the worst. Oh my God, it was the most embarrassing thing ever. Yeah, I was traumatized.

And then I remember one time I was in New York, on a fire escape, having this conversation with this girl. I was at a party, I think. And — never do this again, and if there are any guys listening, don’t do this — I looked at her and I was like, “Can I kiss you?” And she just goes, “No.” I was like, “Oh, okay.” Those are the 2 times I can think of.

ALEX COOPER: What do you do though to recover from that? Did you stay on the fire escape, or are we like —

Growing Up and Early Memories

PAUL WESLEY: I don’t recall, it was so long ago, but I remember being like, “What a dumbass, I cannot believe I just asked her when she clearly has no interest in me.”

ALEX COOPER: That’s actually completely amazing. Okay, what is a night out that you can remember that gave you the worst Sunday scaries?

PAUL WESLEY: Oh, God, I’ve had so many of those. You mean, like, is that what you mean by that?

ALEX COOPER: Like you made some bad decisions the night before, you woke up, really bad hangover. You’re like, “Oh, what did I do? Like, Paul, what did we do last night?”

PAUL WESLEY: I mean, I was a bit of a troublemaker when I was a kid, and my friends and I got fake IDs at the age of 15. And we would— these horrible fake IDs. But somehow they worked in New York City and we would take the train up to the city at like 15, 16 and go to these clubs and stay out till like 7, 8 in the morning. And that was like the worst. I can’t even imagine doing that.

ALEX COOPER: Kids living near New York City when they’re younger— you lived a different life.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Like, what do you mean you’re at a club at 15?

PAUL WESLEY: No, it was crazy. And I just remember sneaking out of my house and doing the traditional stuffing my bed with something that looked like a human and then losing track of time. And then my phone— of course, I didn’t even have a phone. This was like pre-cell phone, and I had a beeper. And I just remember 7 in the morning would hit on a Sunday and I would get a beep. The beeper would go off. My mom would be like, “911, 911, call me right now, Paul.” And I’d be like, “Oh my God, how am I going to explain this?”

ALEX COOPER: But also, like, 15-year-old boy being in the club.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my God.

ALEX COOPER: Not having much success, I would assume.

PAUL WESLEY: None. None. About as much success as I had on the fire escape.

ALEX COOPER: You’re not buying bottles?

PAUL WESLEY: No, I’m not doing anything. I’m standing in the corner doing God knows what.

ALEX COOPER: You’re lucky to get in. The bouncer’s like, “Get out of here.”

PAUL WESLEY: Oh, 100%. And they all knew it was a fake ID, but they’re somehow letting you in. It was like New York in that time was like a totally different—

ALEX COOPER: That’s fair. Okay, a time when you did something petty to get back at someone.

Getting Back at the Cool Kids

PAUL WESLEY: Oh gosh. I mean, I would not consider myself a petty person. However, you know, in high school, I went to 3 different high schools. I wasn’t like a cool kid at all. And even in middle school, there was definitely times where there was the town bully, or the cool kids who were older that didn’t want to invite you to the parties, kind of making you feel like you’re not part of the in-crowd and all that.

And I remember, I got on this big TV show. I was 26. And all of a sudden out of the woodworks come all these guys that wanted nothing to do with me in high school. All the girls that wouldn’t give me the time of day. And all of a sudden they’re like, “Hey, man, my girlfriend— my sister or whatever— let’s hang out. Hey, can you call my sister just to say hi?” And I would just be like, you know what? As petty as this is, no. You know what I mean? It just felt like now you want to be friends, you know what I mean?

ALEX COOPER: I appreciate, though, when people do that because they’re like— I remember. And I don’t think that’s fully being petty. That’s you being like, “Oh, I clocked exactly what’s happening right now. You don’t get me now.” Yeah, I’m all good.

PAUL WESLEY: And my philosophy these days is always like, kill them with kindness. I’m always the kind of guy who’s like, always just be nice— that’s my technique. I don’t want to be petty, but I do remember when I was in my mid-20s and the show came out, I was like, “You know what? I’m going to be a little bit petty.”

ALEX COOPER: I think we’re all backing you on that one. What is something you did unexpectedly that went viral on the internet?

Going Viral: The Madison Beer Moment

PAUL WESLEY: I can think of one very big thing that became viral on TikTok, which was when a fan asked me if I liked Madison Beer. And I thought that was a type of beer. And I said, “I’ve never had that kind of beer before.” I was like, “I’ve never had Madison Beer.” So that was— that was special.

ALEX COOPER: And then as it kind of spiraled, how did you handle that moment?

PAUL WESLEY: I mean, at that point I was like, “Do I then apologize to Madison Beer? Do I need to make a public apology?” Because she obviously is very famous. But I’m just like an idiot. I don’t know.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, like you’re in your own world.

PAUL WESLEY: I don’t know what’s going on. And so it was very funny because it became this whole thing. I remember there was some publication that— frankly it was during COVID too, so maybe there was less stuff going on— but it was like top 50 pop culture moments of 2019, whatever the heck it was. And I remember it was like, “Paul Wesley thinks Madison Beer is a beer.” And I was like, that makes the top 50?

ALEX COOPER: Do you get anxiety when something like that you did is trending, or do you not care?

PAUL WESLEY: I think it’s funny. I don’t care.

ALEX COOPER: You don’t care?

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

Paul Wesley’s Real Name

ALEX COOPER: When I was preparing for this interview, I discovered something new about you.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh no.

ALEX COOPER: I didn’t know that your name isn’t Paul Wesley.

PAUL WESLEY: Right.

ALEX COOPER: I’m going to try to pronounce it and then you’re going to—

PAUL WESLEY: I can’t wait.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, hold on. Your first name is Pavé.

PAUL WESLEY: Almost.

ALEX COOPER: Okay. And your last name is Vashilevsky.

PAUL WESLEY: Whoa.

ALEX COOPER: Whoa.

PAUL WESLEY: Do you have some Eastern European descendant?

ALEX COOPER: No, I actually put the pronunciation down for myself. Wasilewski.

PAUL WESLEY: That’s perfect.

ALEX COOPER: So, okay, wait, you say it. Say your full name.

PAUL WESLEY: Paweł Wasilewski.

ALEX COOPER: Paweł.

PAUL WESLEY: Paweł.

ALEX COOPER: Paweł.

PAUL WESLEY: Paweł.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, oh, wait, that sounds too Philly. Hold on, let me try that again. Say it again.

PAUL WESLEY: Paweł. Paweł Wasilewski.

ALEX COOPER: Wasilewski.

PAUL WESLEY: Amazing. Oh, look at you. Do you want to play an Eastern European on You Deserve to Know? Like, do you want to play a Polish murder suspect? Because I think you could do that.

ALEX COOPER: Honestly, maybe. Yeah. How did we get here? How did you get from that to Paul Wesley?

PAUL WESLEY: So my parents are both from Warsaw and they immigrated to this country. My older sister was born there in Warsaw, Poland, and I was the first of the family to be born in the United States. And growing up, my parents didn’t speak English well and we spoke Polish at home primarily. So my mom always called me Paweł and Wasilewski is my name.

But in school it was Paul Wazulowski because that’s how the Americans would pronounce it— which, phonetically, I guess if you read it, that’s how it comes across. So my whole life it was Paul Wazulowski and I’m like, Wazulowski doesn’t really speak to me. Do you know what I mean? Like, that’s not who I am. So I’d try to correct people and be like, “No, it’s Wasilewski.” And they’d be like, “No, no.”

I started acting and got my first few TV shows and it was always this huge drama to pronounce my name. And I just said, “You know what, if they’re going to call me Paul Wasilewski, I might as well just change it.” So I didn’t change it legally. I remember thinking I wanted my last name to start with a W and I wanted it to end with an E sound, because like my real name— Wasilewski. So I just literally started writing down random last names that could work and I somehow stumbled upon Wesley and I was like, “I like the ring. I like the sound of that.” And I just came up with it. It was as simple as that. It’s totally arbitrary.

ALEX COOPER: Wait, what did your parents think about you changing your name?

PAUL WESLEY: I remember asking my grandfather on my mom’s side— so technically it wasn’t his name— but I remember he was like, “Go for it. Absolutely change it. Of course you should change it.” My dad was a little bit like, “I’m not so sure.” But then they kind of came around to it. And I didn’t change it legally. Yeah, legally I’m still— Wasilewski. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, so your parents can be really happy about that.

PAUL WESLEY: Exactly.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, that’s good.

PAUL WESLEY: Just my stage name.

Growing Up Polish-American in New Jersey

ALEX COOPER: From New Jersey? Yes, not New York. Good to clarify. Your parents immigrating from Poland.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Can you paint the picture of what your house was like growing up? Like, put us right in there, Paul. What are we experiencing in this home?

Growing Up in New Jersey

PAUL WESLEY: I had a great childhood. My parents are wonderful. What’s great is I grew up in the proximity, 45 minutes south of Manhattan. And so it was always like Manhattan was this kind of like, oh my gosh, this is like the place, right? I was so enamored. I really wanted to end up somehow in Manhattan.

I remember I was playing ice hockey my whole life and my parents were pretty smart people. My dad went to Columbia. He’s a computer engineer. My mom has a master’s in psychology and my sister’s a lawyer. They’re all pretty highly educated. And so I just never fit into that mold. I always wanted to do something different.

I started doing theater and all this, and my parents were so great because they put me in acting classes. They wanted me to just be happy. So I started doing these acting classes in Manhattan, and somehow an agent saw me and was like, “Hey, do you want to audition for stuff?” And I was like, “Sure.” And that’s how I ended up in Manhattan. I got a TV show at 16. I started making my own money and I got my own apartment in the city.

I guess in answering your question, I credit them with giving me the kind of flexibility and allowing me to pursue my dreams. They wanted me to be happy. They weren’t like, “You have to go to—” they wanted me to get good grades, but they were like, “More important is for you to be passionate about what you do.” And so I feel like I was able to do what I love to do and to have this career in film and television because they were supportive.

ALEX COOPER: Well, that’s incredible because I feel like so many people don’t have that experience. So it feels like you have to rebel. But to have actually supportive parents, it must have felt so safe for you to explore your passions.

PAUL WESLEY: Absolutely.

ALEX COOPER: Being close to New York, though, obviously there’s so many different cultures that come in and out of New York in a beautiful way. But like, you were in New Jersey.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: And close to Jersey Shore, right?

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah. Yes. 20 minutes.

ALEX COOPER: You’re like, please come on. Come on now, calm down, Alex.

PAUL WESLEY: But if I showed you some photos of me, you’d be like, for sure that guy could have been on the Jersey Shore. You remember the Jersey Shore, honestly, right? Paul?

ALEX COOPER: Oh my God.

The Jersey Shore Days

PAUL WESLEY: So I’ve never seen the Jersey Shore, but I have a funny story to tell you. I used to do the whole Jersey Shore thing. I had a house in Belmar and my friends and I used to like lift weights, you know, like gym tan laundry and all that kind of thing. Literally wax our eyebrows and walk around like this in our tank tops. Anyway, it was like so pathetic.

I remember I was in my 20s and I was doing something for The Vampire Diaries, and somehow they were like, “Oh, the cast of Jersey Shore is here.” And I was like, “Oh cool, I’ve never seen it.” And the guy who plays The Situation—

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, yeah, yeah, Mike the Situation. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay, so that guy comes up to me, he’s like, “Hey Paul.” And I was like, “Hey.” And he’s like, “We used to hang out in the Jersey Shore.” And I was like, “We did?” And I asked a few friends, and they were like, “Yeah, he used to hang out with us. We used to go out with the Jersey Shore.” I didn’t even know I was part of the Jersey Shore. Fist bumping.

ALEX COOPER: You had the Situation right under your fingertips and you didn’t even know.

PAUL WESLEY: I had no idea.

ALEX COOPER: You may have been out with Snooki and you didn’t even know.

PAUL WESLEY: For all I know, I could have been. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Paul, why do I feel like that’s your life where you’re like, “I didn’t know Madison Beer wasn’t a beer. I didn’t know I was friends with the Situation.”

PAUL WESLEY: I didn’t know any of this.

ALEX COOPER: Exactly. Like, life just keeps happening and Paul’s like oblivious. Dude, that’s crazy.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, so did you ever get a spray tan?

PAUL WESLEY: Of course I got a spray tan.

ALEX COOPER: You were gym tan laundering.

PAUL WESLEY: Actually, I did. I did a spray tan when I was— my friends, I’m telling you, I mean, it’s like I shouldn’t be admitting this, but when I was like 17 we used to literally— it was all about how big our muscles are. I was like 40 pounds heavier. It was all about muscles and being tan and then making sure you have no chest hair and walking around the Jersey Shore like this and honestly fighting. We would get into like fistfights all the time. Oh my God, you have no idea.

Playing Donnie on The OC

ALEX COOPER: When you were saying that you were getting jacked and you were doing all that, you know what it made me think of?

PAUL WESLEY: What?

ALEX COOPER: Donnie.

PAUL WESLEY: Donnie from The OC.

ALEX COOPER: Paul.

PAUL WESLEY: Donnie from The OC.

ALEX COOPER: One of my favorite shows. How were you on one episode?

PAUL WESLEY: I was only on one episode.

ALEX COOPER: Okay. You made such an impression. To remember that you were on The OC and to only be in one episode, that’s pretty incredible.

PAUL WESLEY: You’d be surprised how many people come up to me and go, “Donnie!” It is the craziest thing. Just one episode. And I remember because I read for the main guy, Ryan, who— Ben McKenzie is a good friend of mine. I adore him, by the way. So is Adam Brody. And I just met them when I was doing Donnie, when I was playing Donnie.

I remember I read for Ryan. I didn’t get it. I was very devastated. And they called me like, “How about Donnie? You’re more of a Donnie.” And I was like, “Sure, I’ll play Donnie.” And then I just played myself, basically. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, it came so— because that was like, you were in Chino with Ryan or something, and you guys like— yeah, you were there. You were like the scary guy.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh yeah, I shot somebody. I shot the blonde guy. I was like, “Yeah, b, you shot Luke.” You got shot. I shot Luke. Thank you.

ALEX COOPER: You fully shot—

PAUL WESLEY: I shot Luke.

ALEX COOPER: You came into the party. You had the gun.

PAUL WESLEY: I had a gun.

ALEX COOPER: Oh my God, cut the clip with good old Paul.

PAUL WESLEY: Roll the clip with Donnie.

ALEX COOPER: Bring it back. I remember, I think you had like a thick armband.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh yeah, armbands. Oh my God, you were so Donnie. I was so Jersey. I was so easy to play. It felt organic, 100%. Didn’t have to study for that role at all.

Life in the West Village

ALEX COOPER: So you eventually get into acting, right? And in the early days, you end up living with your childhood friend Ricky and his Pomeranian in a studio apartment in the West Village. Did you have 2 beds?

PAUL WESLEY: We had 2 beds.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, that’s weird.

PAUL WESLEY: Pomeranian and him on one, me on the other. 2 twins, you know.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, 2 twins.

PAUL WESLEY: 2 twins. Right there next to each other. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, like a little nightstand in between.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, exactly, literally. And this is back when we were like wearing tank tops and still feeling ourselves. So everyone was like, “Welcome to the neighborhood.”

ALEX COOPER: In the West Village.

PAUL WESLEY: In the West Village.

ALEX COOPER: What were you 3 getting up to around that time?

PAUL WESLEY: God. By the way, I love that you said “you 3,” including the Pomeranian. Like the Pomeranian was clubbing with us. No, it was like I was on a soap opera with Brittany Snow. Yeah, who’s— I think she did— she did the show. Yes, she’s one of my dear friends. She’s the best.

So Brittany and I played boyfriend and girlfriend on a show called The Guiding Light. I was like 16 years old making a bunch of cash. I was like, “Ricky, I’m going to get an apartment in the West Village.” And he’s like, “Great.”

ALEX COOPER: Is that how you would talk?

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, yeah, pretty much. Something like that. There was a little accent there.

ALEX COOPER: It was giving a little New York.

PAUL WESLEY: It was giving a little Sopranos. Yeah. No, I used to have a thick Jersey accent. But anyway, it was just like the best time of my life, you know? It was like fake IDs and just partying and doing the soap opera. And frankly, that’s where I kind of learned how to work with the camera and be more relaxed. It was an amazing training ground. So many great actors came from that.

But Brittany’s amazing. Want to hear something funny? I’m going to call out Brittany. She’s said this story, so it doesn’t really matter.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, give it to us.

Brittany Snow’s First Kiss

PAUL WESLEY: It’s really funny. It’s Brittany’s story. So we were on set and I’m like 16, 17, so whatever. I had kissed girls before. And Brittany and I had our first kiss scene and I was like, “Cool, no big deal, whatever,” because we were playing boyfriend-girlfriend and Brittany was younger than I was.

We did the kiss scene and I’m like, “Okay, that was fine. That went well.” I remember afterwards her mom comes up to me and goes, “Just so you know, that was her first kiss ever.” And I was like, “What? I didn’t know that.” And like, to this day— so cute. Yeah, it’s so sweet. To this day, Brittany’s first kiss is the kiss on camera with me. It was really sweet.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, you’re a good guy. I feel like you probably made it just so sweet and chill for her.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Wait, that’s cute.

PAUL WESLEY: It was really— now we’re really good friends. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: And to see just how successful you’ve both been in your own rights, to think about you like little youngins.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Imagining Brittany also being probably so nervous.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my God, I can imagine. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Oh my God, it’s actually probably good that you didn’t know until after.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, exactly, exactly.

ALEX COOPER: That’s really sweet.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, so what would you and Ricky do though if you both had a girl that you wanted to bring back and we’ve got the twin beds, Paul? Like, what are we doing?

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my gosh, like, what happens? What did happen?

ALEX COOPER: You’re like, “Ricky?”

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, let me get back to you on that one. I don’t remember. I plead the Fifth. I think we probably—

ALEX COOPER: You figured it out.

PAUL WESLEY: I’d be like, Ricky, go take a walk. Get out of here.

ALEX COOPER: But you can leave the Pomeranian.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, leave the Pomeranian. Doesn’t care.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, fair. So you and Ricky had your stint, you did your thing.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

Paul Wesley and Ian Somerhalder: A Brotherhood Beyond the Screen

ALEX COOPER: Then there’s been another bromance in your life. With none other than your Vampire Diaries co-star, Ian Somerhalder.

PAUL WESLEY: The Smolder.

ALEX COOPER: Is that what we call him?

PAUL WESLEY: I call him the Smolder Holder.

ALEX COOPER: Like when you call him every day, or is that what you’re saying?

PAUL WESLEY: Just Smoldy. I call him Smoldy Pants.

ALEX COOPER: Smoldy.

PAUL WESLEY: I’ve— for years I called him Smoldy Pants.

ALEX COOPER: Does he like that?

PAUL WESLEY: I think deep down inside he likes it.

ALEX COOPER: What does he call you?

PAUL WESLEY: F*face, probably. Yeah. I mean, we’re so funny. We call each other like— Ian and I are like— we’re in this like domestic partner— no, not a domestic partner, we don’t live together. It’s like we’re in a marriage, you know?

It’s like we started off as colleagues working together, then we’re like best friends, then we’re like, okay, we see each other every day for 8 years, I love you, but also like then we’re like brothers, and now we have this business together.

It is like such a complicated— it’s like my longest relationship I’ve ever had in my life. We’ve been— I feel like we’ve been together for 20 years, and I know what he’s going to say before he’s even going to say it, and he knows what I’m going to say, and we’re yin and yang.

ALEX COOPER: Do you bicker like a married couple?

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my God, we bicker. We hug it out. I mean, it is like— it is—

ALEX COOPER: How do Nikki and Natalie feel about it?

PAUL WESLEY: When you guys are all together, they’re like the calm energies, and we’re the Tasmanians. Devils. They’re like— by the way, thank God for Nikki and Natalie. Natalie calms me down so much, and I feel like Nikki calms him down so much because him and I are a little—

ALEX COOPER: Natalie’s energy when we got drinks, I was like, she is so good. She’s so, so good. She is so steady, so steady, calm, sophisticated.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my God, lovely.

ALEX COOPER: I’m so happy for you. But now knowing the two of you are like that, I’m like, ooh, even more now.

PAUL WESLEY: That makes sense. Yeah. And Nikki as well is like much more like— Ian moves 1,000 miles a minute, you know? Have you met Ian?

ALEX COOPER: No.

PAUL WESLEY: He’s like— I mean, the guy will literally— he can talk to anyone for like 2 hours. He will literally just corner you and talk to you and lose track of time. He is like this— he’s the most personable person that you’ll ever meet. You would love him. Everyone just looks into his blue eyes and just melts.

I mean, it doesn’t work on me anymore. I’m like, get the hell out of here. Yeah, but it worked initially, you know?

First Impressions: Meeting Ian Somerhalder

ALEX COOPER: Okay. Almost 20 years in this partnership, in this marriage. Go back. Think about what was your first impression of him and when did you first meet him?

PAUL WESLEY: The first time I met him was in Burbank, California, after we both got cast on the show. We knew we’d be playing brothers and they’re like, you need to go to this dental office because you need to get a fang fitting. We need to get your fangs fitted for the show, because they have to mold them.

So I remember I pulled up to this dentist and he’s like leaving, and I’m like, hey. Like, I guess we’re going to play brothers. He’s like, yeah, yeah. He’s like, I just got my fangs fitted. I’m like, yeah, I’m going to get my fangs fitted as well. I was like, I’ll see you on the plane tomorrow.

And then I remember we decided to sit next to each other on the plane on the way to Vancouver because we shot the pilot in Vancouver. And this is a perfect example of how me and Ian are total polar opposites. I’m glass half empty, I think everything is doomed. He’s glass half full, and the truth is usually somewhere in the middle. This time he was right.

I look at him and I go, so we’re doing this pilot, huh? He’s like, yeah. I’m like, I don’t know, man. Vampire Diaries. Do you think we’re going to get picked up? He’s like, yeah, I think we’re going to get picked up. I’m like, I don’t know. You think it’s going to be a hit? I don’t think it’s going to be a thing.

And he just looks at me, and I still remember to this day. He just goes, “Au contraire, mon frère. It’s going to be a big deal. Mark my words.” And I was like, “Au contraire, mon frère.” I was like, “Who speaks like that?” But anyway, he was right.

ALEX COOPER: He was right.

PAUL WESLEY: He was right. He was dead on.

ALEX COOPER: Oh my God! That’s actually kind of crazy though, because knowing that you guys ended up shooting all the time in Atlanta. But going for that pilot, I’ve obviously interviewed actors before and it is crazy to know that most of the time that first episode is not filmed where it’s going to be filmed.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: And you have no idea if you’re going to get picked up.

PAUL WESLEY: No idea.

ALEX COOPER: When was the moment you think you were like, oh, I think I really like this guy? So first you’re kind of dipping your toe in the water. You’re like, oh, Au contraire. You’re like, okay, this guy’s kind of kooky and I like him and he’s uplifting. But when were you like, oh, we’re friends?

Moving to Atlanta: The Brotherhood Begins

PAUL WESLEY: So the show got picked up. And then I was like, okay. I was like, I’m going to take this seriously. Like, this is a big deal. Because I had done like 8 pilots and they all failed. Some got picked up, but none of them lasted.

And I had this feeling after the show got picked up— and it tested really well. They tell you about whether it tests well with the audience. They’re like, something special with this one. I was like, we have to do a good job.

So I was like, Ian, we need to— we’re playing brothers. We need to bond, and we need to really study together. He’s like, you’re right. He’s like, I have an idea. He’s like, let’s fly to Atlanta and let’s get apartments next to each other so we can just live next to each other. And I was like, good idea.

So I remember, and to this day I remember, we literally get to the airport and I pull up. I’m wearing these light blue jeans, a black leather belt, a white Hanes shirt, black Ray-Bans and cowboy boots, these Fry boots. And I look over at him and he’s wearing the exact same thing.

We literally looked at each other and we’re like, we look like the Blues Brothers. We got off the plane and decided to go apartment hunting and got apartments next to each other so that we could be close to each other, so that we could practice and study lines together. And it was just like the funniest thing pulling into Atlanta wearing the exact same— oh, we had the same color backpack as well.

ALEX COOPER: Paul.

PAUL WESLEY: And I remember we stayed at the W Hotel for the first night. We walked in and everybody just looked at us like, who are these guys? It was really funny.

ALEX COOPER: He’s basically your soulmate.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, since day one. Yeah, so he was like my brother the minute we landed in Atlanta.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, but then I can’t help but be like, why do I feel like I can see Ian and you living next to each other was a good idea at first, and then you’re literally coming home after a long day on set, going into your rooms and he’s like knocking on your door like, Paul, come out and play.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, yeah. I was like, leave me alone.

ALEX COOPER: He’s like knocking on the wall.

PAUL WESLEY: No, but truthfully, jokes aside, we really— we didn’t mess around. Like, the first 2 seasons we were like, oh my God. And then by the 3rd season we’re like, we’re good. This doesn’t need to be fake bourbon on set anymore. Let’s go ahead and maybe switch that out with some Woodford Reserve.

ALEX COOPER: And by the way, yeah, sorry, Warner Brothers, because you guys did drink so much.

PAUL WESLEY: You were just constantly— by the way, it’s not like we were sh*tfaced on set, but towards the end of the day, you’re like, I’ve drank enough of this unsweetened iced tea which is supposed to be bourbon. I think I can, you know.

ALEX COOPER: And the amount of scenes that Ian had to do like dancing in the mansion alone, like give that man a little something.

PAUL WESLEY: Give that man— yeah, get him some bourbon. Get him some bourbon.

Brothers Bond Bourbon: From Vampire Diaries to Business Partners

ALEX COOPER: Speaking of bourbon, look at that transition. You guys started Brothers Bond Bourbon, inspired kind of by these Vampire Diaries days that you had together. How many drunk nights did you guys have trying to develop this and get it right?

PAUL WESLEY: So, COVID hit, right? We always talked about doing a bourbon, and I remember COVID hit and it was like I couldn’t leave. I was sort of a nomad. I was shooting these TV shows up until COVID, and then I was stuck. We were all stuck. We couldn’t leave.

And I remember we lived in the same little community at the time. We had houses in Topanga. And Ian called me up one day, he’s like, hey man, we’re not doing anything, we can’t leave our houses, we can’t do anything. He’s like, do you want to just come over and blend some bourbon? Like, let’s figure out how to blend some bourbon and let’s launch a bourbon. And I was like, yeah, I’m not doing anything else.

So I would just go to his house and we would create these blends— and in his kitchen, we’d go by the fire pit outside and we would just try— he would have all these graduated measuring cylinders. He looked like a mad— like in Back to the Future, what’s his name, Doc? Yeah, he kind of looked like that. His hair was— everybody was mad. He had a beard. He had all this bourbon. It was like a chemist.

And I remember we just spent like months creating these blends that we liked, and then we finally found something we loved. And then we sent it into this lab essentially to analyze the mash bill, and they were like, this is your mash bill. I was like, great, that’s Brothers Bond. And then we did a small friends and family round and raised a little bit of money and launched the bourbon, and boom.

ALEX COOPER: Congrats. That’s so crazy to see, and it’s such a great idea. Obviously you guys have such a strong brand already in the two of you, but then to launch that, that felt very organic for you guys to do together.

Brothers Bond Bourbon & The Close Friends Q&A

PAUL WESLEY: We genuinely love bourbon. And that’s all we drank in Atlanta, when we would film, finish filming and be like, God, we just shot 14, 15, 16 hours. Let’s go to the bar. And we would always drink bourbon. That was like our thing.

So the Brothers Bond, obviously it’s like a nod to me and Ian on screen. We have a bond as brothers, but also off screen, that was like our brothers bond. So it was very funny because when we started the company, we didn’t have a name and we were pitching Walmart, and our CEO’s like, “We need a name.” And they’re like, “We’re on calls in an hour. We can’t just pitch a brand that doesn’t have a name.”

And Ian’s like, “Okay, I got it, I got it, I got it.” I was like, “Okay, what is it?” He’s like, “Brothers Supreme.” And I was like, Brothers Supreme? I was like, “Dude, that’s the worst name for a bourbon brand ever. We are not Brothers Supreme.” He’s like, “I think it should be Brothers Supreme.” I was like, “All right, give me a minute.” And I sat there, and I started texting all these, and I was like, “Brothers Bond.” He’s like, “Great, done.” And then 15 minutes before our pitch to Walmart, we had the name Brothers Bond.

ALEX COOPER: Well, I also love it because it’s so you and Ian. He basically came up with the first word, and then you’re like, “No, no, no, adjust, adjust, adjust, adjust, adjust. Second word is this. Boom, go.”

Okay, Stefan obviously had doppelgangers, but do you have any alter egos when you’re drinking?

PAUL WESLEY: I’m like a pretty good drinker. Which is probably not a good thing.

ALEX COOPER: Are you like happy? Are you quiet?

PAUL WESLEY: No, I’m just happy and funny. Sometimes I do these Q&As online.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, we’re getting there.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay. Half the time I’m drinking. Maybe more than half the time.

ALEX COOPER: No, I love it so much. That is some people’s worst nightmare — like, “I don’t want to do anything online unless I know exactly what I’m posting.”

PAUL WESLEY: What I don’t react well to is some people are like, “Oh, I’m going to smoke a joint and then I’m relaxed.” That’s like my worst nightmare. If I smoke a joint — which I don’t — I don’t react well to marijuana. I will be the most awkward, insecure — I’ll have a total mental breakdown, like a panic attack. But if you give me a bourbon or whatever, I’m chilling.

ALEX COOPER: You’re ready?

PAUL WESLEY: I’m my real self.

The Close Friends Q&A Origin Story

ALEX COOPER: Okay, let’s talk about those Q&As. You’ve really cornered the market, unintentionally.

PAUL WESLEY: For the record, this was not a master plan. Another byproduct of COVID.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, a lot of good things came for you.

PAUL WESLEY: I guess so.

ALEX COOPER: So you started posting this close friends Q&A thing, basically. Talk to me about the criteria for close friends.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay, so this is the genesis. A girl that works with us named Remy, who’s awesome — she does all the Brothers Bond social media, a lot of our marketing, she does whatever. Long story short, Remy was like, “Hey, there’s this app that allows you to have close friends that subscribe to your — ” like, because I didn’t have a close friends on my own Instagram, and she’s like, “It allows your fans to be close friends.” It’s this app thing, I forget the name of it.

And she’s like, “Should I sign you up?” I’m like, “Sure, what the hell else am I doing? It’s COVID.” And so she’s like, “Great, do whatever you want.” I’m like, well, it’s not OnlyFans, I’m not going to post shirtless selfies. So what can I do to make people feel — how can I interact with people? So I just started doing these random “ask me a question” things, and let’s just shoot the sh*t.

And then suddenly I didn’t realize that you could take those Q&As, screen record them, and then suddenly they ended up on TikTok — unbeknownst to me. So suddenly I’m all over TikTok with these Q&As, and that is how this whole thing happened.

ALEX COOPER: It is like the through line of this is Paul Wesley has no idea what the f* is going on. This whole interview you’re like, “By the way, and then somehow this thing called TikTok.”

PAUL WESLEY: I know it sounds like it’s premeditated. I promise you it’s not.

ALEX COOPER: No, no, I believe you. You could tell.

The Daddy Gang Close Friends Q&A

ALEX COOPER: Okay, so we’re going to make the Daddy Gang feel like close friends of yours today.

PAUL WESLEY: All right, let’s do it.

ALEX COOPER: We’re going to do a little Q&A. And you’re going to get in the headspace of like your phone’s in front of you, you’ve had a little bourbon.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: And you’re just going to answer from the heart, whatever comes to mind. What is something that really pissed you off lately?

PAUL WESLEY: What is something that really pissed me off lately? Oh my gosh. So many things piss me off all the time. Well, I haven’t spoken to Ian in a week, so I’ve been pretty calm — zen, more than usual. No, I mean, listen, I love Ian, but he will drive me crazy because he’s too glass half full, and I need some negativity in my life. So I would say Ian. The answer is Ian.

ALEX COOPER: Why haven’t you spoken to him in a week?

PAUL WESLEY: I’ve just been busy. I gotta call him. Should we call him?

ALEX COOPER: Please call him.

PAUL WESLEY: We’ll call him.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, we’ll call him. Call him now.

PAUL WESLEY: Should we call him?

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, just say hi. Okay, come on, Ian.

PAUL WESLEY: All right, let’s see if he picks up. By the way, he never picks up the phone. Do I even have him? I don’t even have him in my favorites. That just goes to show you.

ALEX COOPER: I think he’s in my phone.

PAUL WESLEY: No, I have him in my phone.

ALEX COOPER: Do you have him in as Ian Somerhalder?

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my God, you’re going to laugh. I make fun of Ian’s fedoras, his giant hats. I have a giant exaggerated fedora as his profile photo. He won’t pick up. This is going to piss me off. You ask me what pissed me off — this is what’s going to piss me off.

ALEX COOPER: Like, I’m in the middle of the show.

PAUL WESLEY: Never picks up.

ALEX COOPER: I feel like he would pick up. I feel like that’s his personality.

PAUL WESLEY: Ian, come on. Pick up.

ALEX COOPER: I feel like you’re the one that wouldn’t pick up.

PAUL WESLEY: I’m the one. I definitely.

ALEX COOPER: “Your call has been forwarded to voice—”

PAUL WESLEY: Are you kidding me? This is what pisses me off, Ian.

ALEX COOPER: Wow. Okay, so he doesn’t answer your calls often?

PAUL WESLEY: No, he does. He’s just — Ian’s the kind of guy that will literally put his phone down and corner someone for like 3 hours, and then no one can get a hold of him, and we’re all just like, “Yeah, he’s in one of those calls.” He’s very focused on what he’s doing, which is probably a good thing. He’s not a multitasker.

More Q&A: Sleep Habits and Fan Stories

ALEX COOPER: Okay, what is something that gives your fiancée Natalie the ick about you?

PAUL WESLEY: I refuse to go to bed unless I have a humidifier and a sound machine. So I have to travel with a humidifier and sound machine.

ALEX COOPER: You’re high maintenance.

PAUL WESLEY: I like good sleep. Sleep’s important to me.

ALEX COOPER: Do you do the mouth tape?

PAUL WESLEY: No mouth tape.

ALEX COOPER: Okay. Eye cover?

PAUL WESLEY: Eye cover.

ALEX COOPER: Earplugs?

PAUL WESLEY: Sometimes.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, you’re strapped in.

PAUL WESLEY: I’m strapped in. Natalie’s like, “I’m not feeling turned on right now.” She’s like, “I look over at you, you have a mouthguard, a sleep mask, a white noise machine, and a humidifier blowing in our faces. Paul, can we just — can you chill?”

ALEX COOPER: Just tone it down.

PAUL WESLEY: Can you just relax?

ALEX COOPER: Okay, this is a good visual to have.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, or not.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, what is the craziest thing a fan has sent you?

PAUL WESLEY: I have a crazy story. I don’t know if this is something that they’ve sent me, but one time I came home — I was living at the time in the Hollywood Hills — and I came home from something and it was like the middle of the night. I remember at 11 p.m., I pull up and I’m in — I don’t live in this house anymore, so it’s okay. But I pull up to the driveway and all of a sudden I see like 9 suitcases in my driveway. And it was the weirdest thing — you know, like back in the day when women would go to the hairstylist and they had those bowls.

ALEX COOPER: Oh yeah.

PAUL WESLEY: What do they call them? Like a perm bowl?

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, like a perm bowl.

PAUL WESLEY: Like a perm bowl. Yeah, it was a perm bowl.

ALEX COOPER: In your driveway?

PAUL WESLEY: In my driveway. I was like, “Why is there a perm bowl in my driveway? What is going on?” And there was a fan there, and she goes, “Hey.” And I was like, “Can I help you?” And she’s like, “We’ve been emailing. You told me I can move in.” I swear to God. And I was like, “What are you talking about?” Someone was pretending to be me and told her that she could move into my home, and she brought the perm bowl.

ALEX COOPER: I was going to say, I don’t know what’s weirder — that she was ready to move in —

Fan Encounters and Viral Moments

PAUL WESLEY: She brought the perm bowl was the thing that weirded me out. The luggage — I was like, whatever, it’s fine, we could deal with this. The perm bowl — I was like, why does that have to come with it? I love also that we’re calling it a perm bowl.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, or whatever. What is it? A dryer that is used when you’re getting a perm. Paul, so what did you do?

PAUL WESLEY: I said, look, it’s not me. I haven’t been emailed. First of all, I was like, how do you know where I live? And she’s like, “What do you mean, everyone knows?” I was like, “Everyone knows? What are you talking about?” So that was — yeah, that’s weird.

ALEX COOPER: That was weird. I also heard someone sent you a big box of sausages.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh yeah, someone did send me a big box of salt. Thanks for reminding me. But yeah, I did get sausages.

ALEX COOPER: And what did you take from that?

PAUL WESLEY: I didn’t eat the sausages. I don’t know if it was innuendo, if it was just — maybe it’s because I’m Polish.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, it will make you feel better if that was it.

PAUL WESLEY: It was because of the kielbasa.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

PAUL WESLEY: Maybe they were meant for Ian. They were like, “Get this to Ian.” I was like, “No, no worries, I’ll get that over to him.” Love Island, have you watched? I’ve never seen Love Island.

ALEX COOPER: So do you not know what the Clam Slam —

PAUL WESLEY: I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. That is the weirdest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.

ALEX COOPER: If you had to think about like, all right, a Clam Slam —

PAUL WESLEY: What? I don’t even know where to start. Okay, okay, walk me through this.

ALEX COOPER: This is your new Madison Beer. Okay, so everyone in the world is talking about the Clam Slam.

PAUL WESLEY: Clearly not everyone in the world, but okay, true.

ALEX COOPER: It’s the Clam Slam that was heard around the world, basically. Okay, so there is this woman Kenzie, and on Love Island, she could just be mid-conversation with you and then she just drops to the ground and she does a split. I can’t — I’m seeing your face. Oh my God, I’m laughing so hard. Bullshit.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh my God, it’s just a quick little one-two boom to the ground. And what? I mean, this is so out of left field.

ALEX COOPER: I don’t even know, but I just didn’t know. Maybe you, Jersey, I don’t know. Do you know what —

PAUL WESLEY: What are you asking me?

ALEX COOPER: I guess I was wondering, like, as —

PAUL WESLEY: Have I seen a Clam Slam in the Jersey Shore? What?

ALEX COOPER: Have you ever seen a Clam Slam in real life?

PAUL WESLEY: I have never. I didn’t even know. I don’t even know what to say. I met it for the first time in my life. I’m at a loss for words.

ALEX COOPER: I have not laughed this hard in an interview in so long.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah. No.

ALEX COOPER: Okay, so you’ve never witnessed a Clam Slam? No. Okay, okay. It’s just in my mind now. This is good. This is good because the Love Island fans are going to love that. We’re moving on. Kenzie’s going to love that one. Okay. Are you and Justin Bieber in any way related?

PAUL WESLEY: I don’t think so. Not to my knowledge.

ALEX COOPER: You see people say you guys look like —

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, not when I was younger. It is true. I’ve seen some photos — the fans have taken photos of the two of us and they put them — and yes.

ALEX COOPER: Have you ever met him?

PAUL WESLEY: I don’t think so.

The Unauthorized Halloween Costumes

ALEX COOPER: Okay, we got to get that together. Yeah. Okay, someone who also looked like you — there was a Halloween costume situation. Oh yeah. And I’m going to have to find the pictures and put them up because when I was looking at them, it is so insane. It’s unbelievable. Can you tell the story to everyone watching of like what happened, Paul?

PAUL WESLEY: Right, okay. I don’t even know how I learned about them, but effectively I just started getting word that people were like, “Hey man, I didn’t know you were doing Halloween costumes now.” And I was like, “What? What are you talking about?” Like, “Yeah, my sister just saw you in the Halloween store.” And like, “Yeah, man, you’re hard on cash. What’s going on?” I was like, “What is that?” So I was like, somebody find me these Halloween costumes.

And suddenly fans started sending them to me. People online were like, “Hey Paul, I just saw you at this Halloween store.” And they would send me photos. So I got wind of these Halloween costumes that are so unbelievable, because they’re so awful — where they just literally took my face and they would put them on various — it’s almost like a comedy. They would put me in like various positions, like Luigi, but then the mustache was upside down. And then they’d be like, “Warrior, Zen warrior master,” and it was like me in a robe.

And I called my lawyer and I’m like, “What can I do about this? There are Halloween costumes with my —” there was one with me with a sombrero. It was unbelievable. And I was like, where did they come up with these ideas? Anyway, I had a few people bring them to me. I actually have them physically.

So my lawyer found out the company that was making the Halloween costumes, and she was like, “Hey, cease and desist. What are you doing? You cannot use my client’s face.” And they were like, “We have no idea what you’re talking about. This is not Paul Wesley. This is someone that looks like Paul Wesley.” And it’s literally my face. And I’m like, “What do we do?” She’s like, “We don’t know. The company’s based in China. We don’t know how to get to them. We don’t know what to do.”

So to my knowledge, they’re still producing these Halloween costumes. Wesley’s still out there. He’s out there. Like GI Joe. And there’s always a new one. There’s like doctor, and then it’s like — but then my hands are huge, but then I have these short legs. It’s like the weirdest — they’re like the worst Halloween costumes ever.

ALEX COOPER: And so you just keep seeing like every Halloween there’s like a new —

PAUL WESLEY: I’m playing a new character. It’s like cosplay. Oh my God.

ALEX COOPER: And so you have no compensation for this?

PAUL WESLEY: No comp. By the way, I should be getting tons of compensation. Through the roof. Through the roof. Okay. That’s really weird. Yeah.

The Stephussy Question

ALEX COOPER: Yeah. Can you — this is a really big question. I need you to lock in.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay. I’m still thrown off from the Clam Slam, by the way. I’m still recovering. I’m frazzled. Paul, I started sweating.

ALEX COOPER: I was laughing so hard.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, me too. I snorted. I don’t snort. The Clam Slam will go down.

ALEX COOPER: You know what the Clam Slam is?

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, it will. Literally. This is —

ALEX COOPER: This is a good transition from the Clam Slam. Okay. It’s kind of the same caliber.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay, lock in.

ALEX COOPER: Okay. Can you define Stephussy?

PAUL WESLEY: I got to lock in. Yep.

ALEX COOPER: That’s what I said.

PAUL WESLEY: Take your time. I got to take my time.

ALEX COOPER: You need a water break, whatever you got to do.

PAUL WESLEY: It’s a bit of an enigma. It really is. I was doing the Q&A, as you know, the infamous Q&A. And one of the questions, someone called me a Stephussy. And I was like, I am going to answer that question. I think they said, “Are you a Stephussy?” or something like that. And I was like, I’m going to answer it because I could choose the questions. So I willingly chose that question. I was like, I think this is a good idea. This is a good one to answer.

And I somehow was like, “Yeah, I guess I am a Stephussy.” And somehow this became the greatest — like, now when I walk down the street, I swear to God, people aren’t like, “Hey Paul,” or “Hey, Stefan from The Vampire Diaries,” or whatever. They’re just like, “What’s up, Stephussy?” So now for the rest of my life, I am a Stephussy because someone asked me if I was a Stephussy on my Q&A. Paul, so if you want, you tell me what a Stephussy is.

ALEX COOPER: I have no idea. Nor do I. I can’t even —

PAUL WESLEY: We kind of maybe understand what it is. Groundbreaking. Yeah, it’s almost better to not define it. It’s almost better to not define it because it could be whatever it is for anyone, and we can’t put it in a box.

ALEX COOPER: Exactly. We can’t put it in a box.

PAUL WESLEY: Wow. Yeah. And by the way, I keep waiting for it to fade. I’m like, surely in time I will no longer be Stephussy.

ALEX COOPER: You’re on Call Her Daddy and we got Stephussy questions.

PAUL WESLEY: It’s been years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It will not leave me.

ALEX COOPER: But you did it to yourself.

PAUL WESLEY: I did it to myself.

ALEX COOPER: You almost wonder who was that person?

PAUL WESLEY: Who? And are they pissed that they are not getting the credit?

ALEX COOPER: The credit. Come forward.

PAUL WESLEY: And how do you prove it?

ALEX COOPER: How do you prove who came up with Stephussy?

PAUL WESLEY: Some genius. Who knows?

Stefan and Nina: Behind the Scenes of The Vampire Diaries

ALEX COOPER: Who knows? We’re going to circle back to that. I have a question. Even though obviously you touched on this way earlier, but I still have to ask. When you and Nina started Vampire Diaries and you were like, “We hate each other” — how did you, when you look back, how did you two come together and make it look so good on camera?

PAUL WESLEY: Just, you know, for the record, it’s not that we immediately were like, “I hate you.” It wasn’t like that. We were actually great. And then it was just like we would have these — it slowly, you know — first of all, we were all in our 20s. I will take a lot of responsibility because I was a bit of a curmudgeonly — I was a bit of a grumpy pain in the ass. I was like, “I’m taking my acting seriously.”

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, I heard you were a little intense.

On-Set Dynamics and Chemistry with Nina Dobrev

PAUL WESLEY: No phones on set. I was a little bit intense. And then everyone else was a little bit more chill. And so I think I’m going to take a lot of responsibility for being a bit of a pain in the ass. So that’s number one. But we were both professional and we both knew the work mattered to us. So regardless, we would butt heads on set, but then the minute the cameras rolled, it was like we knew we wanted to make it magical.

Some actors, you can have two really good actors and the chemistry isn’t there. For whatever reason, Nina and I had this chemistry. And I remember when I was screen testing for The Vampire Diaries, it was like me and nine other guys, and I remember all these guys were kind of kissing her ass, trying to whatever. And I remember I just was like, “I’m not going to look at her. I’m not even going to acknowledge her because I want to meet her in the audition. I want to meet her for the first time in the audition.” Because our scene was us meeting for the first time.

And I just remember being in the audition at Warner Brothers, in front of all the executives, and we looked at each other, and it was just this immediate chemistry. We were these two characters, and it just was magical. And so regardless of us not getting along, it somehow clicked. I guess I didn’t really answer your question.

ALEX COOPER: When did you guys start to be like, okay, maybe we can be friends? Was it like season 1?

PAUL WESLEY: No, it was like season— her last season was season 6. And then during season 6, we all kind of grew up and I chilled out and I was less of a pain in the ass. And I just remember looking at her and I was like, “You know what, Nina? You’re going to miss me one day.” I said that to her. And she’s like, “Maybe, maybe.”

And then like two years went by and we kind of kept in touch, and then she came back to do the finale. And we hadn’t worked together in two years, and we looked at each other and I was like, “I missed you.” Like, I missed having her around. And then to this day she’s always like, “I remember you said to me, you’re going to miss me one day. And you know what? You were right.” It’s just this thing that slowly happens.

The Grind of Network TV

ALEX COOPER: You know what’s also cool about that? Because I remember talking to Nina about it. The amount of episodes you guys were doing— TV shows don’t really do it like that anymore. How many were in a season? 22.

PAUL WESLEY: Sometimes we would do 23.

ALEX COOPER: I wish we could go back to those days so I could just binge it all, but now there’s like 8. That amount— you guys were together so much, and sometimes you almost don’t recognize what you have until it’s gone.

PAUL WESLEY: Absolutely. And I also think it’s different environments. There was a lot of stress, and you’re young, and this was very pop culture. We were at the forefront. It was very different from having success in a prestige show where people know you, but you don’t have screaming fans. We had a lot of pressure, and I didn’t know how to handle it in a way that was really mature.

Navigating Fame

ALEX COOPER: How did you feel about becoming so famous and having such a fandom in the beginning? How did you navigate that?

PAUL WESLEY: I was really very deeply uncomfortable, truthfully. And I’m not just saying that out of humility. I genuinely was deeply uncomfortable and I kind of turned into a bit of a recluse. I didn’t go out that much. And thank God, in a way, we were in Atlanta because we were kind of separated from Hollywood and all the parties and all the nonsense. But I definitely tried to hide under a rock a little bit.

I didn’t luxuriate in that moment, because it’s such a special time. Acting is such a difficult career, and to have something that’s successful, that people love and look forward to, is such a privilege. I didn’t take it for granted, but the things that came with it, I didn’t enjoy them. Whereas now I’d be like, “This is awesome.” But at the time, I just didn’t—

ALEX COOPER: You weren’t equipped. Did you guys in Atlanta hang out and go to bars all together? Were you able to go out?

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, we had our one bar that was like our stomping ground. It doesn’t exist anymore, but it was called Krog Bar. It was this tiny little wine bar, and we took it over every Friday night, every Saturday night. The whole cast would go, the crew would go, and nobody else really went. That was our thing, and we didn’t really go anywhere else.

Stefan, Elena, and The Vampire Diaries Fan Questions

ALEX COOPER: Okay, Stefan, lock in. If Stefan had told Elena in season 1 that he stalked her because she looked like Katherine, do you think their relationship would have survived?

PAUL WESLEY: Probably. It’s kind of creepy, kind of weird. No, I don’t think it would have.

ALEX COOPER: Did Stefan and Caroline’s relationship feel like a natural evolution to you?

PAUL WESLEY: Not really.

ALEX COOPER: I agree. I didn’t need that. Do you think he should have ended up with Caroline or Elena?

PAUL WESLEY: I think the brothers should have died together and he should have ended up with no one.

ALEX COOPER: Morbid.

PAUL WESLEY: Ian feels the same.

ALEX COOPER: You guys talked about that a lot?

PAUL WESLEY: Oh yeah. Ian’s like, “I wish I died with you.” He’s so upset.

ALEX COOPER: Did you ever take anything from set?

PAUL WESLEY: Yes. I took the daylight ring and then I lost it. I also took a pair of jeans. They still have Stefan on them.

ALEX COOPER: They had them engraved as Stefan?

PAUL WESLEY: No, just so they wouldn’t get mixed up with Damon’s. On the inside they put Stefan.

ALEX COOPER: You lost your ring?

PAUL WESLEY: I lost my ring.

ALEX COOPER: So you guys can’t go to events and wear your rings together?

PAUL WESLEY: Not that we would do that anyway. Come on, go to events and wear my ring?

ALEX COOPER: Me literally going, “Oh, but you have them.”

PAUL WESLEY: Ian theoretically puts his on. Ian’s like, “Oh, I have my ring on,” just to give me a taste of Damon. I was like, “You’re a loser.”

ALEX COOPER: But you’re also secretly jealous. We need to get you one made for your birthday. I’ll work on that.

Okay, who do you identify most with in real life? Stefan, Silas, or Tom Avery?

PAUL WESLEY: Silas.

ALEX COOPER: That is such a good segue to the next one. Where do you stand with Matt Donovan?

The Matt Donovan Debate

PAUL WESLEY: I firstly love Zach Roerig, who played Matt Donovan. But I have my whole gag with Matt Donovan. The whole reason I’m always giving Matt Donovan sh is because he was the only human, the only mortal, and he’s the only one that didn’t die. How did he not die? How did Stefan die like nine times?

And there’s this one scene where Elena’s drowning in a car with Matt Donovan, and Stefan’s this immortal vampire, and I’m like, “I’m going to go save the love of my life.” He dives down there and he’s trying to get her out, and she’s like, “No, no, don’t save me, save Matt Donovan.” And Stefan’s like, okay. And then he just takes Matt Donovan and she drowns. I’m like, what is going on?

ALEX COOPER: I forgot that it was Matt Donovan in the car.

PAUL WESLEY: That’s my whole beef.

ALEX COOPER: That was so unbelievable. But it was because Elena felt bad for Matt Donovan. Everyone always felt bad for him.

PAUL WESLEY: Are you kidding me? The love of my life. Come on. I’m not going to save the sheriff, and I saved the sheriff and let her drown. To this day it’s a big problem for me.

ALEX COOPER: As it should be. What storyline could you just not get behind still?

The Vampire Diaries Rewatch Idea

PAUL WESLEY: Still? Oh God, there were so many storylines because we did like 170 episodes. It’s like my brain is just this mishmash. Yeah, I mean, there were a couple— what did they have? These— gosh, you know the show better than me. Yeah, I’ve never even seen the show. They had these— I’ve never seen it. I’ve seen the first couple of episodes, and then I directed a few episodes. I watched the episodes I directed. I’ve never seen the show otherwise, so I actually don’t remember.

ALEX COOPER: Oh, we got to do like a rewatch.

PAUL WESLEY: Should we wear daylight rings?

ALEX COOPER: And you know, you want to make some bank? Yeah, you and Ian rewatch podcast Vampire Diaries. I—

PAUL WESLEY: That would probably do well. Call me. I’ll call you. Can we like do a— yeah, we’ll do a whole Unwell.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, I got a whole studio for you. We’ll make it look like Mystic Falls.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay, let’s discuss. We’ll talk.

ALEX COOPER: We’re going to do a whole—

PAUL WESLEY: We’ll talk offline.

ALEX COOPER: We’re going to get everyone too excited, so now you actually have to do it.

PAUL WESLEY: That is— yeah, you can’t fall through.

Paul’s Love Life and Engagement

ALEX COOPER: Let’s talk about your love life.

PAUL WESLEY: Okay.

ALEX COOPER: God, you got engaged last summer. Yes, last summer. Congratulations. Thank you. You guys met in the wild, which is like— that’s so few people meet in the wild now. So can you indulge us? Like, how did you guys meet?

PAUL WESLEY: You know what’s funny? Ian was there.

ALEX COOPER: Of course he was there.

PAUL WESLEY: Ian was there. So it was— we were promoting Brothers Bond, okay? And my buddy owned a bar. The bar doesn’t exist anymore, sadly, in the East Village. And he said, “Hey, pop into our bar and we’ll make you guys a Brothers Bond cocktail and we’ll, you know, shoot a few photos for us, like get us some press for the bar and we’ll support Brothers Bond.” And he’s a good friend of mine. I was like, “Yeah, of course, let’s do it.” So Ian and I were in New York and I was like, “Let’s pop into this bar.”

So we went to the bar in the East Village and we were shooting some content and stuff and I had a couple other friends meet me there and I just see this beautiful woman sitting there and I was like, “Who’s this hot girl?” I was like, I don’t want to be creepy, I’m not going to look. But then I saw her look at me and I was like, “Aha, okay, so clearly there’s something going on.” So I was like, I’m just going to go. And I never— like, I don’t hit on girls, it’s like not my thing, I’m terrible at it. So I was like, I’m just going to go there and I’m just going to say hi.

And thank God my friend who owns the bar happened to be there. And I walk over and he’s like, “Hey, by the way, have you met Natalie?” And she was right there. So thank God he introduced us because it probably would have been a disaster if I just like cold, you know, whatever. And I said, “Hey, nice to meet you.” We started talking and found out she was from Europe as well. She spoke 5 languages. I speak 2 languages. We started talking and just really hit it off. And that was it.

And then I left the next day, actually. We just exchanged numbers and I left. I left for Europe. I went on a guys trip to Europe, to Italy, funnily enough. And then we just were texting and I would send her some pics from Italy. And then I got back to New York and she was still there. And then I asked her out on a date when I got back because we had been texting for like a few weeks.

The Proposal

ALEX COOPER: And then fast forward, you’re now engaged. How was the proposal? Were you stressed? Did you put a lot of thought behind it?

PAUL WESLEY: I put some thought behind it. So once we started dating, we hadn’t been dating for very long, and I had to go to Italy for— I was doing a— there’s a magazine called Icon. It’s an Italian— whatever, it’s a cool fashion mag. And I did the cover and we were doing a launch party in Rome. And they were like, “You can bring a guest if you want.” And we kind of— we’d only been seeing each other for a little bit. And I said, “Hey, do you want to come with me to Rome?” And she’s like, “Sure.”

So it was in October. All the hotels were closing. I was like, “Let’s rent a car and drive down to the Amalfi Coast. Let’s just go see.” I didn’t book anything, and there’s a hotel down there, Belmond Caruso it’s called. And it was the final day before the closing for the season, final 2 days. So we booked a room and we had the hotel for ourselves. And we had this magical time there and really kind of fell in love.

And so I thought, why don’t I contact the hotel— this is years later when I want to propose— and tell them the story and tell them I want to propose there. So I contacted the Belmond. I said, “Hey, this was like our first trip together and I want to make it special.” And they were so awesome. This girl, actually her name’s Elena funnily enough, who works at the Belmond— now she works for a different company, but at the time she worked for Belmond— she’s like, “Of course, I’m going to make it really special.”

So she set up this— we sort of talked about it. On our last night there, I took her to the Belmond, and there’s this private olive grove, and she set up this long table with candles and a private chef. And I tricked Natalie. I was like, “Hey, you know, the Belmond wants to do like a goodbye dinner for us because it’s our last night here.” And she’s like, “Oh, that’s so nice.” I was like, “Dress nicely.” And I kind of made it seem like it was them, like the Belmond did this and not me. And then we got there and she was kind of suspect. And then of course that’s when she realized— oh, this was a setup. Paul set this whole thing up. And then I popped the question.

ALEX COOPER: That is so romantic.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, it was really sweet.

ALEX COOPER: Wow. It’s also so sweet to like connect it to an early core memory that you guys had together.

PAUL WESLEY: Exactly. Yeah.

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds

ALEX COOPER: Wow. Oh my God, I’m so happy for you. Thank you. Well, you have a lot to look forward to. You are starring in season 4 of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds. Yeah. Can you give fans anything?

PAUL WESLEY: What can we expect? I love this show so much, and I play a young James Kirk, which is one of the most iconic characters in the history of television. So obviously it was a huge honor for me to be given this role. And what I love about our show is that it pays homage to the original TOS from the 1960s, which is such an important iconic piece of television history and so important to so many people. While we pay homage to that, we also kind of create our own spin, our modernized spin, and we sort of tell this story pre-Enterprise.

So this is Kirk, James Kirk, before he was captain. He’s Lieutenant Kirk. He’s not— it’s like the genesis of who he is. But it’s really about the crew that was on the Enterprise prior to James Kirk taking the helm as captain. And this show is this beautifully imaginative, adventurous, cinematic series that has humor and heart. And we explore all different genres.

Sorry if I’m blabbing. I just love this show, so I can go on about it. What I love about the original series about Star Trek is that it is so optimistic. It is so filled with imagination. And our show is exactly that. Every episode is kind of individual. You can enjoy them individually because they all have their own sort of story of the week. But there’s this beautiful through line with all the relationships and all the characters. And we’re just really proud of it. We want people to tune in.

ALEX COOPER: No, of course, as you should be proud of it. Also, it’s so cool being a part of such a huge franchise, obviously. And now knowing you and knowing how much you take your craft really seriously, it’s so cool to hear you also talk about recognizing what was so well done before. And still having the respect for that and also leaning into a new version and finding a way to bring that to life while still— yeah, it’s really cool.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, it’s a lot of pressure, obviously, because it’s like William Shatner. It’s like— no pressure. He is.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, exactly. Kirk’s look is quite, you know, the switch up from Stefan’s. Like, talk to me about that costume.

PAUL WESLEY: Well, I mean, it’s the Starfleet uniform. Everyone’s kind of wearing the same thing. Although I will say, when he’s not on the ship, you do see him in some civilian clothing. But it’s definitely a switch-up. And I sort of lean into this sort of— Kirk can be interpreted in so many different ways. And my interpretation of Kirk is a little bit less of the kind of machismo ladies’ man that’s sort of in pop culture. And he’s more of like— I wouldn’t say bookish, but he’s definitely a little bit more— not nerdy Kirk, but still coming-of-age Kirk, like still trying to find out how to be a captain, you know what I mean?

Breaking Away from Stefan Salvatore

ALEX COOPER: That’s what I love so much about obviously everything you’ve done so far. Like, this is so different from Stefan. Yeah. And then even this, I feel like, is so different from what you’re about to do on the show that we’re making. Yeah. Because the character on You Deserve to Know— like, your character is pretty sus. Yeah.

PAUL WESLEY: And when you get cast in a show or when you’re starring in a show that has become so popular, it is so difficult to break away from that image, right? Like, that’s such a thing. Like, it’s like a CW thing too, I feel like, or even like Friends or whatever. And so my whole goal ever since I ended my work on The Vampire Diaries has been like, what can I do that’s the opposite of Stefan? Like, how can I possibly— how can I differentiate myself because I don’t want to be— I mean, now I am Stephussy.

ALEX COOPER: You were forever Stephussy.

PAUL WESLEY: And at least I have that going for me.

ALEX COOPER: No, no, no, that is like in the Hall of Fame. Like, Stefan Salvatore is kind of yet to the wayside, sort of like in the shadows, right?

PAUL WESLEY: It’s kind of not a big deal. It’s not a big deal anymore.

ALEX COOPER: It’s Stephussy through and through. But that’s not even like a television character now. So now you can focus on Kirk, you can focus on our new show. Stefan’s over there, but it is Stephussy’s kind of like the top coat, and then we have all these little things.

PAUL WESLEY: It’s like Unwell, right? And then it’s like we have, yeah, there’s a bunch of different— and it’s like Stephussy, and then within that is, you know. That needs to be on your trailer.

ALEX COOPER: Yeah. I’m going to make sure that’s on your trailer.

PAUL WESLEY: Please, please.

ALEX COOPER: Do you have anything weird on your rider? Like, should I know about anything? Not that I’m going to be filling in your trailer. On my rider? No, no, yeah, like, you know.

Wrapping Up

PAUL WESLEY: Oh, you mean like we just, we want this page in? Yeah, like what’s on your rider? No, should I start being that guy? I don’t know. I feel like Ian would have good shit in his rider. He would. I feel like he would have like hair mirrors and hair products and a cowboy hat, fedoras.

ALEX COOPER: You don’t ask for anything? I don’t ask for any—

PAUL WESLEY: I’m going to start. What should I ask?

ALEX COOPER: You need to put a rider together and we’re going to make— what do you ask for? I asked for like Sour Patch and like— no shit— iced tea. You can do that? Oh my God, yeah. Before I was pregnant, I’d have like Casamigos Reposado in there if I need a little hit. Brothers Bond. Brothers Bond. I told you when you gave me that bottle, by the way, you loved it, Matt and I drank it, we were like, oh. And then it was so nice because like it was really good, and I was like, okay, now—

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, right. No, no, you don’t have to— you don’t have to pretend.

ALEX COOPER: Delicious. Okay, so we’ll work on your rider. Yeah, please.

ALEX COOPER: Paul, this has been so fun. Such a pleasure. I am so like— I love getting to talk to people who have such a good personality, and you are one of those people.

PAUL WESLEY: Oh, thanks.

ALEX COOPER: Where I could talk to you for forever, but the range in this episode from Jersey Shore, from Donnie. Then we had the Stefussy. Then we had the Clam Slam.

PAUL WESLEY: We got that. Yeah.

ALEX COOPER: How is this episode not called “Stefussy and the Clam Slam?” It has to be. Your publicist— that’s a good spin-off.

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, they’re going to— “Stefussy and the Clam Slam.”

ALEX COOPER: They’re like, what is this?

PAUL WESLEY: No, that was— what have you done?

ALEX COOPER: Yeah, Paul, this was— we were going on here with a vision and you went completely the— we’re just—

PAUL WESLEY: Yeah, we went off on a tangent.

ALEX COOPER: No, it was so, so fun getting to sit with you and talk with you. And I— you know I’m a big fan and all the things. So thank you for your time.

PAUL WESLEY: Thank you so much. Thanks for having me.

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